Promise Me
by MapleRose
Summary: Collection of Mwu and Murrue oneshots and drabbles, mostly GS canon. Some humorous and sweet, others angsty and serious, but with one thing in common: romance.
1. Sleep

_AN: after many requests, and my own cravings, I've decided to write a collection of Mwu/Murrue (boy, we need a nickname for this couple, I vote for Mwurrue...) one-shots. I know it's been done before, but I don't want to flood this place with all the separate entries. I like one-shots, it means I can put senseless fluff into them, and I don't have to come up with any decent plots that make sense. Some one-shots are sweet and humorous, while others will be angsty and serious. I'll tell you at the beginning of each one. Happy reading, and don't forget to tell me what you think!_

Disclaimer: What makes you think I own GS, GSD, or their characters? I mean if I did, Mwu and Murrue would get waaay more screentime, in fact, they may been the main couple :D

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**Title/theme: **SLEEP **  
Genre: **Humour/Fluff :D **  
Approx time line: **Phase 8 of GS **  
Summary: **"_Look Captain, we can do this the easy way, or the hard way," he winked. "I've tried to be nice, but you leave me with no choice."_

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Captain Ramius stared out the window into the vastness of space and sighed in relief. They had finally gotten a break from ZAFT's constant attacks, and she was finally able to rest and relax a bit. She was exhausted, but she didn't dare to sleep, for fear of another incoming attack. In a war, there was no pause button, the enemy could attack at any minute. And in outer space, there was no night and day to tell her when it was time to sleep.

She almost drifted to sleep with her thoughts when she felt someone tapping her on the shoulder. She turned and found herself staring into a pair of questioning blue eyes.

"Yes Lieutenant?"

He seemed to be caught off-guard by her accusing tone, but quickly regained his composure.

"I was just wondering what you're doing here at the back of the ship. I thought you'd be sleeping in your room. After all, we don't get that many chances to rest you know."

"I'm fine," she replied. He arched an eyebrow as she stifled a yawn.

"I can't go to sleep. What if there's an attack?" she explained.

"Then all the reason for you to rest. We can't have you getting confused and fire at me or Kira, now can we?"

She was mildly surprised at his concern beneath his sarcasm. She couldn't find any words to retort, so she simply looked away.

"Come on, Captain, go to sleep."

Murrue shook her head while stifling another yawn. "I'm fine."

She was startled as she felt herself suddenly floating in a direction she didn't remember going. She looked and realized that she was being dragged by her arm by the Lieutenant.

"Hey, what do you think you're doing!" she protested and pulled her arm back from his grasp.

"Well, I asked you to go to sleep, but since you didn't listen, I thought I'd help you." He grinned at her innocently.

She arched her eyebrow at him and crossed her arms, not buying his feigned innocence. "I told you I don't need to –" she stopped mid-sentence for an incoming yawn. He gave her a skeptical look.

"Look Captain, we can do this the easy way, or the hard way," he winked. "I've tried to be nice, but you leave me with no choice."

Murrue found herself blushing at his mischievous smile.

"I'm not scared," she answered nonchalantly.

"Really?" he asked, feigning surprise.

"It's hard to find you threatening with that grin on your face."

"Oh," was all he said. But he let his actions speak as Murrue felt herself being lifted by a pair of strong arms, one behind her back and the other under her knees.

For a moment, she was speechless. She had never expected him to be so bold. She blushed and quickly looked away, hiding her blush with her hovering hair, because she knew if he saw her blush, it'd only encourage him.

"P-Put me down!" she demanded once she found her voice. She had meant to sound stern, but it came out more of a squeak.

He chuckled. "You know, it's hard to find you threatening with that tone of voice." His words only made her blush grow deeper.

"I said, put me down!" she tried again, still unable to look at him.

"Uh-uh, I warned you," amusement was evident in his voice. Indignant that he was having fun at her expense, she took a deep breath and turned to him with her best glare, intent on staring him down.

"As your captain, I _demand_ you to put me down at once, Lieutenant La Fllaga!"

But her plan didn't quite work, as she saw him try to hide a chuckle, tried, but failed. She found that the laughter in his blue eyes and his goofy grin were quite contagious. She realized that she probably looked pretty funny, and couldn't help but release a chuckle herself. Big mistake, because it fuelled him on and he gave her a triumphant grin. She sighed, too tired to play anymore. He'd won this battle, and she was ready to surrender, but not before one final try.

"Please, Lieutenant," she looked at him pleadingly.

To her surprise, he relented. Part of her was disappointed as he finally put her down.

"All right, I'll let you walk since you said 'please'. But I'm serious about you getting some rest."

She looked up and saw that he was indeed serious, all traces of playfulness gone, for the moment anyway. And she noticed the fatigue in his eyes that he'd been hiding behind his laughter.

"All right, you win," she sighed. "But you should rest too you know," she added.

He smiled, gently this time. "Yes ma'am," he did a mock salute. "You better go to your room now."

As he turned to leave, she found herself calling after him.

"Wait Lieutenant!"

He paused and turned, a bit surprised. "Yes Captain?"

"Um, could you carry me there?"

* * *

_AN: hehe, think I got carried away with the fluff there :D, but I wrote this at like 11:30 last night, so excuse me if things don't make sense or sound corny... but I'm in need of a lighthearted MwuMurrue one-shot after all those angsty ones I wrote... I think that last line was probably a bit ooc for Murrue, esp since this is set early in the series, but I couldn't help myself, same with Mwu's bold move :D_

_hmm, I think I should take Mwu's advice and get some sleep myself, too bad he can't carry me XD_


	2. Knight

**Title/theme: **KNIGHT  
**Genre: **Angst/Remembrance  
**Approx time line: **between GS and GSD  
**Summary: **_But her childish mind wanted to believe that her life could be perfect like those in the books. After all, like in those stories, she fell in love with her knight. _

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Murrue didn't know that knights existed. Sure she had read about them in books when she was a child, but she'd always passed them off as fairytales, as likely to exist as dragons.

Yet when she though about his actions that day, she was reminded of a knight in shining armour. Yes, a knight, that's what he was.

But whenever she tried to visualize him as a knight as seen in those pictures in her storybooks, she couldn't help but chuckle a bit. Knights were courteous, mature, brave, noble, and polite. While Mwu La Fllaga was indeed brave, he was blunt, loud, immature, and sometimes downright rude. And when she told him that, he had laughed and agreed with her, saying that he wouldn't be caught dead in one of those bulky armours. And then he had teased her by saying that she wasn't exactly the picture of a damsel in distress either, and chuckled at the thought of her being stuck in an overly frilly dress crying for help.

So he wasn't the perfect image of a knight, but he was _her_ knight. She felt so safe with him fighting out there to protect the ship—protect _her_, as the selfish side of her reasoned. He came back for her, to bail her out of trouble, and ultimately came valiantly to her rescue, saving her life with his own.

Murrue knew that life wasn't a fairytale, especially in a war. But her childish mind wanted to believe that her life could be perfect like those in the books. After all, like in those stories, she fell in love with her knight.

_But if this is a fairytale, where's my happily ever after? _


	3. Victory

**Title/theme: **VICTORY**  
Genre: **Angst**  
Approx time line: **after end of GS**  
Summary: **_So, this is victory._

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"Ah, Captain Ramius!" the voice of Andrew Waltfeld greeted her as the captain of the Archangel entered the bridge of the Eternal. "There you are, come and celebrate with us!"

She forced herself to flash a smile. It was over, the long and terrible war was finally over. She didn't feel like celebrating, not after what had happened. But she didn't want her depression ruin the mood for everyone else, so she hid her feelings and came to celebrate with everyone.

_They don't know yet, do they…_and she didn't have the heart to tell them about what had happened.

"Kira!" a girl's cheerful voice broke into her thoughts. Murrue Ramius looked on as the pink princess greeted the young Coordinator as he entered the bridge.

"Lacus?" he was surprised as the girl threw herself at him.

"Oh, Kira, thank goodness you're all right!" the girl buried her face into his shoulder. "You promised to come back to me, so thank you for keeping your promise!"

Murrue smiled sadly at the scene and looked away, giving them privacy. She felt the sting of oncoming tears and hid her face. This reunion, it was what she had imagined herself to be doing, what she _wanted_ herself to be doing. And those words, how she longed to say them to him.

Even though she couldn't help but be envious, she was glad for them. _At least _she_ could be happy… _

"_Don't you worry, I promise to be right back, with victory in my hands." _

She looked around sadly at the cheerful faces of her comrades laughing and joking, rejoicing at their triumph.

_So, this is victory._

* * *

_AN: sorry for another angsty one... (dodges the rotten tomatoes being thrown) but this scene's been bugging me to get written. I've always found that the scene with Lacus seeing Kira off and Murrue seeing Mwu off are so similar, but unfortunately, Kira fullfilled his promise, while Mwu... I've wondered what Murrue would think/feel at Kira and Lacus' reunion..._

_next one will be a happy one, I promise!_


	4. The Heat

_AN: Well, here it is, as promised, a happy/fluffy scene! Thanks everyone for reading and reviewing!_

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**Title/theme: **THE HEAT  
**Genre: **humour/fluff :D  
**Approx time line: **Phase 19 of GS  
**Summary: **"_Hey Captain, aren't you hot wearing that?"_

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"You're his _senpai_, have a talk with him!" the young captain suggested.

"Hmm," he eyed her up and down, "I don't think it'd be good advice." She didn't miss the mischievous glint in his eyes.

"Huh!" she turned with an indignant humph and left him standing there alone.

"Wait Captain!" she sighed in annoyance as he ran to catch up to her. She decided to ignore him.

"Captain?" he tried to look at her face when she didn't answer.

"What!" she snapped, harsher than she intended, as she whirled around to face him.

He stepped back in surprise, and sensing that she was in a bad mood, raised his hands in surrender. "I just wanted to say I was joking. I'll talk to him if you really want me to."

"Sure, Commander," she answered curtly as she turned and went on her way. But he didn't seem to get the hint and followed her once again. She decided ignoring him was the best tactic.

"Hey Captain, aren't you hot wearing that?" she stopped at his out-of-the-blue question.

"What?"

Encouraged that she was actually paying attention to him, he went on. "It's like 1000 degrees in here. Aren't you hot in that?" he pointed to her neatly buttoned up uniform.

"No."

"Really? 'Cause I get hot just looking at you." She noticed that he was wearing a T-shirt instead of his uniform.

"Well, deal with it," she turned to leave again, but he grabbed her wrist and stopped her.

"You know, it's okay to change into something cooler," he said as he eyed her, his gaze following a bead of sweat as it traveled down her temple. Her face flushed as she quickly wiped it away.

"I-I'm fine," she turned quickly to hide her embarrassment. "Besides, I don't have anything to change into," she added in a mumble. She immediately regretted telling his this, as she looked up and saw a mischievous grin lit up on his face.

"Hmm," he eyed her again, as if studying her.

To her complete and utter surprise, he reached down and started to roll up the sleeves of her uniform.

"Commander—" Before she could move to stop him, he went and loosened the high collar of her uniform. Her face flushed, not from the heat, but from his proximity as she felt his gentle breaths tickling her bangs.

"There," he backed up, studying his work, "Much better."

"Wh-how-just-Commander!" she stuttered, flustered.

He laughed. "You need to calm down a bit, Cap'n!"

She glared at him before she started to pull her sleeve down, but was stopped by his hands.

"Uh-uh, remember, relax." He gently pushed her sleeve back up.

She hated to admit it, but he was right, it was stifling hot on the ship. And it did feel cooler and airier with her collar undone and her arms bare. So she let him win. Her shoulders sagged as she sighed.

"Okay Commander, I'll try." She turned to get back to the bridge.

Murrue hadn't walked far when she noticed that she wasn't alone. She groaned as she realized that he was still following her. Even though she was feeling slightly cooler, she was still irritated for some reason.

"Why are you sticking so close to me?" she asked.

"I want to keep ya company," he flashed a roguish grinned as she rolled her eyes. "You know, and to make sure that you don't pass out from the heat."

She closed her eyes and sighed in defeat. He was persistent when he wanted to be, and it'd be easier to play along.

"What the…" She felt herself being ushered in the opposite direction of the bridge and looked over her shoulder. Lo and behold, the Commander was behind her, pushing her with one hand.

"Hey!" she stopped quickly and turned to face him.

"Yes Captain?" laughter twinkled in his eyes.

"Where do you think you're taking me?" she huffed while glaring at him.

"Why, that's a surprise," he winked.

"Well, I have to get back to the bridge. What if there's a sudden attack?" she told him, "With both Natarle and Ensign Yamato out in town, we're short-handed, and I need to be ready!"

"Didn't I tell you to relax?" he was still grinning. Then at her worried expression, his smile softened. "Don't worry, I'm still here to fight for ya!" She almost laughed as he struck a heroic pose accompanied by an over-confident grin.

She exhaled. "All right Commander, but it means you'll have to fight twice as hard," she couldn't help but display a teasing smile of her own.

If possible, his grin got even bigger. "Will do, Cap'n!"

"W-Where are we going?" she asked as he once again led her by her wrist. He didn't answer.

"H-Hey, slow down!" she protested as she found that she had to practically run to catch up with his longer stride.

He turned his head to look at her and chuckled a bit. "Sorry."

Murrue had to shield her eyes with her hand as she came into the sudden brightness. It took a while for her eyes to adjust to the glare of the sun on the desert sand.

"Well?" his deep voice came from beside her.

"The deck, Commander?" she asked, walking to the railing and gazed at the vast expanse of the desert. "It's not much cooler out here than in there." She was right, for the heat was still surrounding them, "And the sun makes it even hotter."

"Hmm, you're right. That's why I told you to change into something cooler." She turned to face him, and was startled at how the sun caught his dirty-blond hair, making it shine like the golden desert sand. A boyish grin spread across his features, and his blue eyes sparkled with amusement. Her face suddenly reddened again, and she told herself it was due to the heat.

He chuckled softly at her awkwardness. "I think I can help you with the sun." He moved to her other side, his tall figure providing some shade for her.

"Thanks," she mumbled.

"But it is a lot airier out here don't you think? I couldn't breath in there." He tossed his head back to catch a gentle breeze. She followed his example and pulled her dark hair up to let the breeze cool off her neck. It did feel refreshing to get a breath of fresh air after being on the ship all day. She felt her previous irritation and bad mood melt away.

"You know Commander, you really _are_ persistent."

He laughed. "I know. I try my best to make the impossible possible." He glanced at her, silently chuckling at her reddening face. "Being so tense all the time can't be good for you, you know."

She smiled shyly, "Well, yes, um, thank you Commander."

* * *

_AN: hehe, isn't that just SO cute:D. I was inspired by Phase 19, when Kira, Cagalli, and Natarle went out into town. (The beginning is with that conversation between Mwu and Murrue when they're talking about Kira and Fllay). I thought these two deserve a little break too you know. I've always wondered how they can wear those uniforms! I mean, they're in the middle of the African desert, inside a metallic ship with the sun shining right on them, and they're wearing these long-sleeved jackets with those high collars that probably don't breathe too well. Murrue's been stuck on the ship for a while, and the heat's probably what gave her the bad mood. I think she needed some help to learn to relax, ne?_

_The ironic thing is, when I first started writing this, I was ice-fishing ('cause I was bored...), and my toes were frozen numb... it was rather interesting to imagine the heat of the desert XD._

_Also, a little shameless self promotion if you don't mind, my first fanart of my dear Hawkie (yes, that's the new nickname I gave to Mwu :D) can be found here: _www. deviantart. com/ view/ 27126305/ _just take off the spaces. I've been wanting to do one of Mwurrue, but haven't managed to finish one yet..._

_Until next time, review please!_


	5. Worry

**Title/theme: **WORRY **  
Genre: **general**  
Approx time line: **during GS **  
Summary: **_Every time he went out, she'd chant to herself that he would be all right, that he would return to her. _

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She didn't know when it happened. She didn't know when she started to worry about him, to feel so scared that this battle would be his last, and she didn't even know _why_ she cared so much.

All she knew that every time he launched, a part of her subconscious would be praying that he would come back, telling herself that he would be fine. Her hands would instinctively fly to where the coffin-shaped locket was hidden beneath her uniform, feeling her heart pounding.

She told herself that he was more than capable of taking care of himself, even so, her heart and mind wouldn't stop worrying.

She was afraid, afraid because he was a soldier like _him_. As she learned first hand, life was cheap on the battlefield, lost in a blink of an eye.

She was afraid because _he_ didn't come back.

"_No, you can't go!" _

_He had looked at her then, surprised by the fact that she came personally. "But I have to go searching for them!" he explained, his face distraught._

"_I can't let you go alone!" her voice quivered a bit, "What would the ship do if you couldn't return!" What would _I_ do if you didn't come back…_

_Despite her efforts to hide them, tears still welled up in her eyes. She had looked down, trying to hide the pain in her eyes._

"_Okay," he had answered softly, his fingers gently brushing her tears away._

So she told herself over and over that his fate was different from _his_, calming herself with her own lies. Every time he went out, she'd chant to herself that he would be all right, that he would return to her.

And every time he landed safely, she would let out her breath she didn't know she was holding.

* * *

_AN: not quite angst, but still a bit sad. In case you haven't figured out, the "him" in italics is referring to her past lover._

_the scene in italics is from Phase 31, which I kinda modified. I love that scene. maybe he wasn't surprised that she came personally, but I was (I didn't think she'd go, I mean, she doesn't leave the bridge too often...). and I think it's so sweet that there were tears in her eyes as she begged him to stay._


	6. Courage

**Title/theme: **COURAGE **  
Genre: **humour**  
Approx time line: **during GS**  
Summary: **_If there was ever one thing that could make the Hawk quiver in fear…_

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Mwu La Fllaga was known as the Hawk of Endymion. It was a nickname earned by his bravery and skills during the battle at the Grimaldi Front. It seemed that people knew him by title even though they didn't know him personally.

It was a name that he was proud of, for it was proof of his courage.

And as the Hawk, he wasn't afraid of much, nothing fazed him, or so it seemed.

He was not afraid to look an enemy in the eye, to fight alone in an outdated Mobile Armour against more powerful Mobile Suits, to risk his life on the battle field, nor was he afraid of a weapon being pointed at him, for he always managed to find a way out of things.

But if there was ever _one_ thing that could make the Hawk quiver in fear…

"Commander!" the stern voice of a woman called out from behind him. He turned and gulped as he looked into the annoyed face of the young captain.

"Yes?" he answered meekly.

"We need to have a talk," came the reply, "About your…behavior on this ship." She beckoned for him to follow her.

His instincts told him to make a break for it. But just then, she turned her head and gave him a "don't you dare" glare that made his knees feel weak. He flashed a false grin as she rolled her eyes.

"Come on."

So he swallowed hard and followed her reluctantly, the gears in his mind whirling to think of excuses.

After all, everyone's afraid of _something_, and the Hawk was no exception.

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_AN: XD! couldn't resist writing this :D. after that half-angsty one, think you can use some humour..._

_Inspired by Chapter 20: Relationship from "Possibilities" by Dominus (great read, I suggest you check it out if you haven't already). As I was writing this, I was thinking, "La Flaga, what did you do -this- time?" :D. I think Murrue could be pretty scary when angry..._


	7. Assurance

**Title/theme: **ASSURANCE **  
Genre: **Romance (mush XD)**  
Approx time line: **Phase 41 of GS**  
Summary: **"_You know what, you're not alone. There's always someone in the world that cares about you and gives you the strength to fight."_

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Murrue Ramius stared out into the blanket of outer space, deep in thought. They had just come back from a meeting on the Kusanagi, and she finally had some down time to think about all that has happened so far. She was still in semi-shock that Uzumi-sama had destroyed Kaguya after sending the Archangel and the Kusanagi into space. Even though she understood what Uzumi-sama was saying, she didn't know how she and her comrades would achieve their goal.

Pieces of debris from past battles floated by, reminding her of the task at hand.

_What should we be fighting for, and how? _

She was suddenly brought out of her reverie when she felt herself being enfolded from behind by strong arms. Gentle breaths tickled her dark hair back as she felt soft kisses being placed on her neck.

"Mwu…" she sighed and closed her eyes in content, leaning back into the embrace.

"A penny for your thoughts Captain?" his deep voice whispered playfully in her ear.

She turned slightly, looking into his deep blue eyes. "Only a penny?" she teased, pretending to be hurt.

He chuckled. "Okay then, how about a kiss?"

She sighed, turning her gaze to the window, at the hazy blue of the Earth.

"It's just that, I'm a little sick of war. I can't believe how powerful the Earth Alliance has gotten. Orb was the last stand against them, and now…" she trailed off, not sure how to continue. He was silent, waiting for her to gather herself.

"I know we promised Uzumi-sama to carry the light, and I understand what we want to fight for. But we're just two ships, how are we ever going to achieve our goal?" she bit her lip, "Looking into space, I feel so small, so insignificant. Can we really pull this off?"

She felt him take her small hand and give it a reassuring squeeze.

"I know," he answered softly. "We are but a few people in the universe. And the endlessness of space really can make you seem small, especially when you're out there in a mobile suit, alone in the cockpit. It can really make you feel lost and scared, believe me. But you know what, you're not alone—you're never alone. There's always someone in the world that cares about you and gives you the strength to fight. We'll be there for you," he paused for emphasis, "_I_ will be there for you. And even though it's just the few of us, we can't let this world disappear. We have to try to bring about a future that we all desire."

She turned around in his arms and hugged him back. "Thank you."

He gently brushed a stray strand of her hair back. "I know it's hard, but please hold on for just a while longer."

Thinking about the battles ahead, she suddenly shuddered. He noticed, but didn't know whether it was from excitement or fear. Either way, he held her tighter, hoping to calm her nerves.

"I, I don't want you to go out there," she suddenly said in a low voice, so low that he had to strain to hear her. Her eyes were lowered, and her voice trembled slightly, "Please stay in here, with me. You can sit at the CIC." She turned to him with pleading eyes.

He smiled softly. "You know I can't. I have to go out there to fight Murrue, you _know_ that." Unable to look at the intenseness in his eyes, she hid her face in his uniform. He cupped a hand under her chin, making her marigold eyes meet his. "Since there's only a few of us, every person has to do their best. You have your duties, and I have mine. If I have the ability to make a difference, I have to put it to good use. The same goes for Kira, for Athrun-kun, and for you too."

She understood what he was getting at, but still, the thought of him out there alone…

"Don't worry, I'll be fine," he assured her at her worried look. "I can make the impossible possible, remember?" She couldn't help but giggle a bit at his cocky tone.

"Okay," she sighed. Then she looked up, eyes serious, "But please, don't get too overconfident out there."

"I won't," he smiled. "Besides," he winked, the seriousness gone and his usual spark back in his eyes, "I'm looking forward for this to be over. Then we'll have all the time in the world."

She smiled and shivered in excitement at the thought of finally being able to spend time with him. She quickly looked down to hide the blush she knew was creeping onto her cheeks. Then looking up, her eyes held the same mischievousness in his eyes, she grinned. "So, now you know my thoughts, where's my kiss?"

He looked surprised at her audacity for a second, but quickly regained his humour. "All right, I guess I do owe you a kiss don't I," he winked.

Murrue closed her eyes and waited for him. But to her surprise, he gently placed a kiss on the tip of her nose. She opened her eyes and pouted.

"Hey! No fair!" she protested as he released her.

"Sorry Cap'n, but you didn't say _where_. Maybe next time, you'll be more specific!" with a cheerful laugh and a wave, he floated down the corridor towards the hanger to tend to his duties.

She knotted her brows before she too started giggling. She sighed and shook her head, that Mwu La Fllaga, he was such a puzzle. But she felt better knowing that she wasn't alone, that he would there for her.

With a content smile, she headed to the bridge, ready for the next battle. After all, she had something to look forward to after the war.

* * *

_AN: Yay for senseless fluff and mushiness! XD. Inspiration came from what Murrue told Kira in Phase 32 of GSDestiny (More on those words can be found in my other story "The Chosen Path"). Also, I've been thinking about the vastness of space, and wondering if they were ever scared of being alone in such a huge place. This idea was originally going to be set earlier in the series (before they descended on Earth), and it was what I was trying to write when I started the first chapter "Sleep" (but that changed directions and turned into something else). So I decided to combine the space/lonely idea with the inspiration from GSD. The fluff and playfulness was thrown in there to counter the seriousness (you know, Mwu can be serious when he wants to be... that's what I love about him :). This also kinda counter-balances "Worry"._

_Aww, Murrue never did get her kiss on the lips :D, maybe next time ;P_


	8. Blushing

**Title/theme: **BLUSHING  
**Genre: **humour/fluff :D  
**Approx time line: **Phase 41/42 of GS  
**Summary: **"_You know Cap'n, you seem blush a lot,"_

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The young captain peered into the cockpit of the Strike, looking on curiously at the man tapped away at the keyboard. She saw the look of concentration on his face and smiled. Sensing her eyes on him, he paused and looked up.

"Am I that interesting to watch?" he asked with his usual smile.

"No, I was just wondering what you were up to. I looked all over for you."

"Did you now," he leaned out of the cockpit, moving his face closer to hers.

She blushed, not knowing why.

"You know Cap'n, you seem blush a lot," he observed. She looked up and opened her mouth to retort, but nothing came out. The amusement in his eyes made her blush grow deeper.

He laughed at her awkwardness before catching her lips in a quick kiss. Before she had time to react, he had sat back down and started tapping at the keyboard again. She stared at him, not sure of what to think or say. He always seemed to have a way of making her speechless.

He finished his work and put the keyboard away. Then he looked up at the dumbstruck captain and grinned.

"Still here? Well, since you seem to be so interested in this mobile suit, why don't you come inside?" Without waiting for her answer, he grabbed her hand and pulled her into the cockpit and closed the door.

"Mwu! What are you—" she protested, but felt blood rush to her face once again as she found herself sitting on his lap.

He studied her as she tried to stand up and move behind the pilot seat in the tiny cockpit. "Yup, you definitely blush a lot!"

Her face grew hot, but she chose to ignore that comment and proceeded to move herself to the side of the seat.

To her confusion, he moved out of the seat and stood on the other side of the cockpit. He gestured to the seat, "Would you like to try?"

"M-Me?" she asked, wondering what he was up to this time.

"I don't see anybody else I could've been referring to," he replied with a smile. "I heard that you were actually the first pilot of this mobile suit, so don't be shy."

Murrue sat down hesitantly, not sure what she was getting herself into. It was ironic that she was the first one to pilot this thing, and now it has passed into his hands.

"What do you want me to do?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

He sighed with feigned exasperation. "Pilot it of course!"

"Who, me?"

Once again, he reminded her that she was the only other person in the cockpit.

Remembering the disaster the last time she had tried to pilot this machine, she protested. "I-I can't."

"Of course you can. You haven't seen the Natural OS that Kira designed, have you. It makes things a lot easier. And if you were able to move it when it wasn't even completed yet, you should be able to move it now quite easily." He placed a hand on her shoulder for assurance.

"Why do you want me to do this?" she asked, looking up at him, confusion evident in her marigold eyes.

"Why, you're the one who seemed to be so interested in the Strike!" he answered with exaggerated surprise. "I mean, weren't you just staring at it so intently?"

"I wasn't looking at the machine," she mumbled, looking down.

"Oh?" he asked, amusement evident in his voice.

"Fine! I'll try it!" she told him with a humph, looking for something to distract him from further inquiring about her actions and further embarrass herself.

She turned on the Strike, watching the activation screen come on. Then she slowly pushed on the foot pedal.

Mwu was right, this new OS made operating the mobile suit a lot easier. And with his careful instructions, she made the Strike do a little dance in the hanger, much to his amusement.

"See? That wasn't so bad now was it?"

She shook her head, smiling. "I guess not."

"Mind if I sit?" he asked once she shut the Strike down. And she gladly let him have the seat back. But before she could move out of the way, he caught her waist and pulled her down so she was sitting in his lap again. She struggled to stand, but he wouldn't let her.

"So, you weren't looking at the machine eh?" he asked with a roguish grin. She reddened again.

She sighed, sensing that he wasn't going to let this one go.

"Okay fine, I was looking at _you_, are you happy now?" she glared at him. "And yes, I do blush a lot," she added.

He laughed merrily. "I never thought I'd see the day when I'd catch _you_ staring!"

She turned her back to him in a huff. Once again, she was angry that she couldn't think of a good comeback. She jumped a bit when his face suddenly came into her view.

"What?" she demanded.

"Thanks for being honest," he grinned, blue eyes sparkling.

Oh great, here come the blush. She tried to hide it by turned her head, but his hand gently turned it towards him. Her heart pounded as he drew her closer.

"You know, you don't make all that bad of a pilot," he told her. Before she could reply, he caught her cherry lips in a soft kiss. This time, he gave her enough time to react and kiss him back.

She drew away first, feeling the sudden need to cool down her flaming face. She pushed the button to open the door and proceeded to climb out clumsily. She turned around as he caught her arm.

"It's okay to blush, Murrue."

* * *

_AN: hehe, more senseless fluff! I just thought that it's kinda ironic that she was the first to pilot the Strike and he was the last TT... I've wondered if she'd ever thought to try piloting an MS, and this kinda spun from that idea. the blushing part just came naturally. It seemed that in a lot of fanfics (including my own), she _does _blush quite a lot XD. and you know how blunt Mwu can be, thought he'd probably tell her :D. The staring part came naturally too, since I love that scene from Phase 19 XD._


	9. Doubt

_AN: the "he" in italics refers to Murrue's first lover_

* * *

**Title/theme: **DOUBT  
**Genre: **slight angst :D  
**Approx time line: **after Phase 38 of GS  
**Summary: **_"Her heart was not ready to accept him, not yet. But even if she was ready, was there room for him?"_

----------------------

The pendant on the silver chain was shaped like a coffin. Engraved on it was a blood red rose. It was a symbol, a symbol of loss.

He'd seen her look at it often, a sad and longing expression on her face as she clutched it tightly to her heart. His heart would tighten, for he didn't like to see her in pain. He wanted to share her burden, to carry it for her so she wouldn't have to suffer alone.

"_You know, I don't like Mobile Armour pilots…" _

From that, Mwu La Flaga gathered that _he_ was a mobile armour pilot like he'd once been. And knowing that, he understood her fear and reluctance to open up to him.

On many occasions, he found himself wondering what was inside that locket, curious as to know who _he_ was, and what _he_ was like. But he'd never asked her about it. It was not his place; he had no right to know.

But still, on those quiet and lonely nights, he'd wonder about _him_, the one who had come before, the man who had left an impression on her heart. He knew that she missed _him_ and still loved _him_, and part of her heart would always belong to _him_. That was fine with him, for he would never ask her to forget _him_ and her past.

She was still mourning, her heart not ready to accept him, not yet. But even if she was ready, was there room for him? He knew he could never replace _him_, but could he fill the void in her heart?

Sometimes, when she looked at him with those sad eyes, he could feel that she wasn't really looking at him; she was looking past him, at the ghost of someone long gone. He could see that those eyes, full of hope and longing, were not for him.

Mwu was not one who lived with doubts. He acted as if he was always confident, always so sure of himself. It seemed that nothing scared him, and nothing fazed him. He seemed determined to win her heart, or at least capture a piece of it.

However, he too was human. In the darkness of his heart, he was envious of him, envious that he'd left such an impression that she'd always remember _him_. _Would she do the same for me? _

Then there was fear. Fear that she would compare him to her lost lover, fear that he would lose, that he would disappoint her. He was afraid that he wouldn't be able to heal her, and gain her love and trust.

As he held her shaking body, trying to calm her nightmares, he wondered if he would ever truly win her heart.

"Mwu?" her soft voice brought him back to reality. He smiled at her, hiding his uncertainties behind his usual grin.

"Yes?"

She smiled up at him then. A genuine smile directed at him and only him, melting away the ice of doubt in his heart.

"Thank you," she brushed her lips lightly against his cheek, the caress like the touch of an angel.

He may not be able to take away all her pain, and she may not be willing to surrender her heart completely to him, but he would try. He would try for her smile.

* * *

_AN: after those fluffy ones, I figured a more serious one is okay for a balance... Inspiration came from my Inuyasha Sango/Miroku (another great couple) one-shot, "Jealous Heart"._

I've wondered if he's been curious about her past lover and what was inside the locket (I know I am). I think as confident and cocky as he is, Mwu probably does have his doubts, esp due to the fact that there was someone who came before him...


	10. Harassment

**Title/theme: **HARASSMENT  
**Genre: **humour/fluff **  
Approx time line: **Phase 25 of GS **  
Summary: **_He never stopped trying. He was persistent, and wouldn't stop until he got her in a lighter mood _

--------------------------

He didn't know why he cared so much. She was the captain, and he was the commander. There wasn't supposed to be anything between them, after all, they were in the middle of a war—a crisis, and they both belonged to the military. But then again, even though he's been in the military for a long time, he'd never gotten used to the strictness of its rules and regulations. Sure, he knew they were necessary in order for it to function, but he still didn't like them.

Perhaps it was the anxiety in her marigold eyes that made him feel concerned about her. He didn't like that look in those eyes, it didn't suit them. He wanted to bring joy to those eyes.

Perhaps it was the worried and distraught look that would frequently find their way to her otherwise pretty face. A smile would be much better. Yes, he wanted to make her smile, to have her laughter chase away her worries.

Or perhaps it was the fact that her small shoulders were often sagged, as if she was being weighed down by the stress of being the captain. He wanted to lift that burden so she could straighten up and walk with confidence.

Whatever the reason, he was attracted to her, wanted to be with her, and tried his best to cheer her up. He knew that sometimes—a lot of occasions actually—that he annoyed her, judging by the look of exasperation on her face. But he never stopped trying. He was persistent, and wouldn't stop until he got her in a lighter mood. And for some reason, she tolerated him, more than any other captain would have.

The Hawk frowned at the tired captain burying her face in her arms on her desk. He didn't like this; he didn't like her sigh of exasperation, nor the sag in her shoulders as if she had the weight of the world there.

He stepped closer and patted her shoulder gently, trying to assure her.

"Stop it Commander," came her muffled voice, "That's harassment."

He quickly withdrew his hand and stared at it, not sure what to say. He hadn't expected _that_ from the usually shy captain. Yes, for once, he was silent. But it wasn't long before an idea hatched in his mind.

"Captain?" he called.

"Yes?" There was concentration and slight frustration on her face as she looked up at him, eyebrow raised. This didn't suit her either, it didn't suit her at all.

"What do you call this then?"

Reaching across the desk, he gently lifted her chin with his fingers and placed a soft kiss on her cheek. He released her and stood back, grinning to himself as he watched her cheeks grow pink.

"C-Commander!" she managed to stutter out in her accusing tone. She stood up, not meeting his eyes, looking flustered as she struggled to stay professional.

_Yes, now that's much better._

* * *

_AN: hehe, after that angsty one, yay for more fluff! hehe, I adore that scene from Phase 25, poor Mwu XD. I imagined what would happen after that infamous line :D_


	11. Insomnia

**Title/theme: **INSOMNIA  
**Genre: **Fluffy  
**Approx time line: **Phase 41-42 of GS  
**Summary: **"_I-I can't sleep," she answered softly._

--------------------------------

Murrue Ramius wandered the halls of the Archangel in her nightdress, her uniform coat draped over her shoulders. The halls were mostly empty, save for a few people staying on guard. She didn't know where she was going; all she knew was that she couldn't sleep.

In outer space, there was no night or day to dictate when to sleep and when to wake, but since the Archangel and the Kusanagi had managed to avoid detection by the Earth Alliance and the ZAFT forces, they were finally getting a moment of peace. Not wanting to waste what precious little time they had, it was suggested that the crew get some good sleep, because they'd need strength in case the enemy shows up.

The young captain had retired to her room, and tried to enter slumber. She was exhausted, but her mind wouldn't let her rest. She shivered as she lay alone on the bed, her fear and irritation over the events in Alaska and Orb plagued her. Frustrated, she got up for a walk, hoping to clear her mind.

She stopped in front of a familiar door and hesitated. Maybe talking with him would help set her mind at ease.

Without thinking, she punched the code for the door. She stepped in the doorway as it slid open. The room was dark, and she suddenly realized that he must have been sleeping. He was probably tired too, and she should let him rest.

Just as she was able to turn to leave, she heard a movement from the other side of the room. She looked, and saw him stir slightly. In the dim light from the hallway, she saw his right eye crack open.

"Murrue?" came his mumbled voice.

Not sure what to do, she entered the room and heard the door slide shut behind her.

"What's wrong?" he asked, sounding half-asleep.

She moved closer to his bed and pulled her uniform tighter around her shoulders.

"I-I can't sleep," she answered softly. She felt her cheeks grow hot, and was grateful that the darkness of the room hid her embarrassment.

He grunted in reply. And without saying another word, he lifted the cover with one hand, as if inviting her.

She looked around for a while, as if debating what to do. Then she took a deep breath and slowly approached his bed, letting her uniform slide off her shoulders. She hesitantly climbed onto the bed on the room he made for her, her heart pounding so loudly she was afraid it'd wake him.

Before she could change her mind, she was enveloped by a pair of strong arms and felt herself being pulled close to him. Her cheeks grew hot again as she could feel his gentle breaths tickle her bangs and heard a content sigh from him.

"Mwu!" she protested softly. But her words fell to deaf ears as she realized that he was already asleep.

She sighed. His embrace was so warm and comforting. She felt her doubts and fears melt away, because of the knowledge that he was there.

Murrue shifted to a more comfortable position and snuggled close to him, drawing another happy noise from him.

She was finally able to sleep.

* * *

_AN: aww, wasn't that sweet? I got the idea when I was trying to fall asleep, imagining it must be nice to snuggle up to Mwu... (yeah, fangirl side of my brain taking over for a moment...)_


	12. Breakfast

_AN: This one takes place right after the scene from last chapter: Insomnia_

* * *

**Title/theme: **BREAKFAST  
**Genre: **Fluff  
**Approx time line: **Phase 41-42 of GS  
**Summary: **"_What's this?" she asked as he set the tray down in front of her. _

----------------------

The captain of the Archangel cracked open an eye and yawned. She murmured in content, for it had been a while since she had a good night's sleep. She looked around the darkness lazily, not wanting to quite get up yet. There was no daylight to speak of in outer space to dictate when it was time to get up. She looked around, searching for her clock to tell her when her shift on the bridge would be starting, but the clock was nowhere to be found. Her eyes snapped open as she realized with a start that she was not in her room.

A wave of panic came upon her as she bolted straight up, her heart pounding. _Where am I? _

She observed her surroundings in the dim light from the monitor screen in the room, her eyes having already adjusted to the darkness.

She was alone, sitting on the bed in her nightdress. There was a desk in the room, similar to hers. On the desk was her uniform coat, sitting unceremonially in a heap. Beside her clothes was a pile of magazines; the light was too dim for her to make out the subject.

So she sat there, trying to figure out where she was. The clue that tipped her off was another uniform coat hanging on the back of the chair in front of the desk. In the dim light, she was able to see that instead of a red shoulder band like hers, this one had a black shoulder band with one yellow stripe.

_Mwu's uniform? What is it doing here? Wait… _

She suddenly remembered the events from before she went to sleep, how she had wandered into his room, wanting to talk to him, and ended up…

Her thoughts trailed off as she felt her cheeks grow warm. She smiled to herself at the memory and looked to the spot where he had laid beside her.

_Wait, why am I alone? Where is… _

Just as she was about to get up and find out where he went, the door slid open. She looked and saw a tall figure being framed by the light from the hallway.

"You're awake I see," came his smiling voice. He entered the room and flicked on the lights. "Oops, sorry," he said sheepishly as he saw her blinked rapidly to adjust her eyes to the sudden brightness.

Murrue shook her head. "It's alright. What time is it?"

"Your shift doesn't start for another twenty minutes," he answered as he came over to her, carrying a tray.

She inhaled the scent wafting from the contents on the tray. "What's this?" she asked as he set the tray down in front of her.

"Breakfast in bed," he answered proudly as he straightened up, an impish grin on his face.

She laughed. "Oh Mwu, you're so silly!" But she was touched that he cared enough to bring her food.

"I know," he answered matter-of-factly and kissed her on the cheek before heading for the door.

"Wait!" she called. He paused in his step and turned. "Don't you want to share?" she asked, holding up a piece of toast.

To her disappointment, he shook his head. "I already ate. I have to go check on something."

She pouted. "Aww, you brought me food and want me to eat it alone?" She chuckled as he gave an exaggerated sigh.

"Alright, I suppose I can stay for a while."

She scooted over to make room for him as he sat down beside her and watched her eat.

"So, did you sleep well?" he rested his chin on her shoulder and hugged her, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.

Murrue blushed and nodded, which made him chuckle. Before he could say anything more to embarrass her, she stuffed a piece of muffin in his mouth. She giggled as his eyes widened in surprise.

"Yes, I slept well. Thank you."

"You're welcome to stay, you know," he offered once he managed to swallow the muffin.

She smiled. It was a nice thought. "I'll think about it," she replied as she finished the food on the tray.

"Where's my coffee?" she asked as she eyed him.

"Hey, I only have two hands," he protested, "Besides, I don't want you to spill it all over my bed you know."

She grabbed the pillow beside her and hit him in the face with it. "I'm not messy, unlike you!"

It was a pretty simple breakfast, but it was the best breakfast Murrue had in a long time.

* * *

_AN: hehe, more cheesy and senseless fluff XD. for some reason, I don't see Mwu as a very neat person, so I don't think he quite cares that he leaves his magazines out in the open like that XD, or help her fold her uniform all nice and neat. he probably just picked it off the floor and dumped it on his desk (like I would do...)_

_Also, I have a question about Murrue's EA uniform. Have you noticed that she's the only person we've seen in the series whose uniform has red shoulder bands instead of black (like Mwu's and Natarle's)? I wonder why that is..._


	13. Understanding

**Title/theme: **UNDERSTANDING **  
Genre: **Serious/a bit of angst **  
Approx time line: **Phase 33 of GS **  
Summary: **_More than ever, she didn't want him to leave, she needed him, for more reasons than one._

---------------------------

He didn't like the worried and distraught look on her face. She looked as if there was a huge burden on her shoulders.

"You know Captain, you don't have to look so depressed. We made it to Alaska alive."

"Hmm?" she turned towards him, as if she hadn't heard a word he said.

"Tell me what's on your mind," he stated as he placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Commander, am I a good captain?" she asked softly, "And please don't lie."

He was slightly taken aback by her sudden question. "Well," he scratched the back of his head, "I—"

"I know I'm not the best, I hadn't even expected to become the captain of this vessel. But," she looked up at him, "Did I at least do an okay job?"

"Well, we've made it this far despite constant pursuits by ZAFT, that counts for something, doesn't it?" he offered.

"I suppose…" she sighed.

"Hey, don't worry too much about it okay?" he patted her shoulder gently.

Her thoughts wandered back to the inquisition earlier in the day, getting irritated as she recalled Colonel Sutherland's words. Sensing her distress, his furrowed his brow.

"Captain?"

"I was just thinking about the inquisition," she replied, anger evident on her face.

Mwu grabbed a chair and sat himself on the other side of her desk. He understood her anger, for he felt the same. The Colonel had blamed many disasters on the actions of the Archangel, particularly on Kira, who was still MIA, and the decisions of the Archangel captain.

"Does his words bother you _that_ much?" he asked, hoping that she would talk to him about it, in order for her to get her frustrations out. But it seemed to be the wrong thing to say, as instead of answering, she glared at him. But then she sighed; maybe it was better to talk about it rather than keeping it in, and she was sure that he would understand.

"I was just thinking that maybe the Colonel was right in some aspects," she sighed. "I let Kira-kun handle a piece of top-secret military equipment. Coordinator or not, he was still a civilian student, he wouldn't have been able to know the power of the Strike, and I hadn't even warned him. If I hadn't let Kira-kun use the Strike then, Heliopolis—"

"If you hadn't let Kira use the Strike, we wouldn't be here right now," he cut her off. His fists clenched in anger as he thought back to Sutherland's words during the inquisition. "The fact is, if he hadn't been there, or had he been a Natural student who wasn't able to update the OS, we'd all be dead, because the Archangel would've never made it without the Strike and Kira's abilities. If he hadn't been there, the Strike would've fallen into the hands of ZAFT."

Seeing her surprise at his anger, his tone softened slightly. "And who knows what would've happened to Heliopolis if we hadn't retaliated," he sighed. "Besides, what's the use of wondering what could've happened?"

"Yeah, I know," she said slowly, "But so many people have died because of the Archangel and the Strike."

"We're in a war here, for crying out loud!" he replied, exasperated. Then seeing her defeated look, he sighed and continued in a more even voice. "Look, those incidents, Heliopolis, Artemis, the advanced fleet, and the Eighth Fleet, nobody could've predicted them, and nobody should be blamed for them. I'm not trying to justify our actions, but, even though many people died because of them, many people were also saved."

She had no answer to that. Looking up, she saw a hint of anger in his eyes that he was trying to hide.

"What are you still so angry about?" she asked.

He hadn't expected that from her. But since they were talking about the inquisition, and she was telling him her thoughts, he might as well tell her.

"I'm angry at the fact that Sutherland is blaming everything on the kid. Kira's a good kid, with good intentions on protecting his friends, and like I said, without him, we wouldn't be here." Mwu paused to control the anger slowly creeping in. "After all Kira had done for us, I can't believe that Sutherland would talk about him as if everything was _his_ fault simply because he was a Coordinator. It wasn't as if Kira _wanted_ to be a Coordinator, or to be fighting his own people." Mwu recalled the conversation with the kid back in Orb, and remembered the distress and turmoil on his face whenever he had to go out there to fight.

Murrue listened intently. She too, had been angry about that. She was every bit grateful to Kira as the rest of the crew was. And every time he went out there to fight, she'd feel a pang of guilt.

"I know. Kira-kun didn't want to fight…" she said softly.

"It's all my fault! I was the one who dragged him into this!" she clenched her teeth, angry at herself for putting Kira through such agony.

"So what if it's your fault," he replied in a somber tone. "Can you go back and change the past?"

She looked up, surprise written all over her face. She had not expected him to say that. He wasn't looking at her, but rather staring out the window of her room.

She sighed to herself and looked down again. He was right, but it was still hard to swallow the guilt.

"The Colonel said that I was right to detain them, but I think I've made a huge mistake. Because of me, Tolle-kun and Kira-kun..." she paused, unable to continue. "They're still so young, and I dragged them into this war." She looked up at him for assurance. "Was it all a mistake?"

"Look Captain, I'm not here to judge you," he answered quietly. "I wasn't there, so I can't say if what you did was right or not. But what difference does it make? It's already happened, mistake or not.

"There's no use wondering what could've happened. As selfish as this sounds, what's important is that we're here now. We've accomplished our mission, and you and I are still alive, aren't we?"

"Yes, but in the end, we lost the Strike, and Tolle-kun and Kira-kun…"

"I know." She saw that there was a slight pained look in his eyes. Mwu had remembered the lost and sad look in Miriallia's eyes as she searched in the hanger for the other Skygrasper, and how he wasn't able to do anything. As for Kira, he had grown quite fond of the kid, and it was rather hard for him to swallow the fact that the young boy was gone. "But what can we do now? You said it yourself, let's trust Orb for now."

"I-I should have stayed and searched for them," she looked down and clenched her fists.

"No," he stated, "We were right to leave. If we had stayed, we wouldn't have been able to survive. For once, the Lieutenant was right."

Murrue rested her head on her arms and sighed in defeat. "Perhaps Natarle would've been a better choice for commanding this ship than me. I, I can't always follow the rules of the military. And I seem to always make the wrong decisions."

"Stop it Captain!" She looked up in surprise. He had meant to sound stern, but it came out harsher than he had intended. Realizing his mistake, his voice softened.

"What has happened is now behind us. We don't know whether or not the Lieutenant would be a better captain because we can't go back to change the past. What's important now is to think of the future."

The future. Now that the Archangel had finally reached its destination, Murrue wondered what would be in store for her and the ship. But whatever her next assignment would be, she'd have to do it alone, because both Natarle and the Commander were being transferred.

That thought had made her gasp in realization. _They were being transferred. _

"Captain?" he reached over the desk and placed a hand on her arm.

"Oh," she looked up. "I was just thinking how I'd handle things without Natarle's help. And without you—"

She promptly stopped herself and quickly looked away, hiding the tear buds beginning to form in her eyes. She didn't want him to know. There was no point, since she'd probably never see him again.

"What about me?" he asked softly.

She felt his hand on her shoulder. Quickly blinking her tears and regret away, she turned to discover that he was standing beside her.

"I-It's nothing, really," she refused to meet his eyes and tried to steer the conversation away from the current subject. "I was just wondering if I'd be okay by myself."

"Oh, you'll be fine. You're a pretty capable person," he smiled, but noticed that she wasn't smiling. If anything, she looked more depressed.

She knew that he was trying to make her feel better, like he'd done many times in the past. And that thought just made her even more depressed, because she reminded herself that he wouldn't be there anymore when she needed him. Tears gathered in her eyes again. Afraid that he'd see them, she turned away.

She was surprised, to say the least, when he grabbed her wrist and pulled her into his arms, letting her head rest on his shoulder.

Murrue couldn't hold back her tears anymore, as they ran down freely down her cheek, soaking into his uniform. But he didn't seem to mind, for he held her as she cried silently, relieving herself of all the pain and stress of being the captain.

What was she doing? She was acting like a child! She was the captain, and the captain was supposed to stay strong. She wasn't supposed to show her emotions and her weaknesses in front of others. But then again, like she said herself, she wasn't exactly the conventional captain.

But of all the people she could break down in front of, why him? And of all the times, why _now_, the day before he had to leave?

More than ever, she didn't want him to leave, she needed him, for more reasons than one. He had been there to make her smile, to help her out, and most of all, he understood her situation and her stress. Before, when he had wanted to go searching for the kids, she had been able to stop him—she had the authority to stop him. But this time, she couldn't prevent him from leaving her. And that thought just made her cry even harder.

Mwu knew that Murrue was strong, that she would be able to handle things on her own, and that she would be fine without him. Maybe he was selfish, but he didn't want to leave as much as she didn't want him to leave. So as he held the shaking captain in his arms, he began to formulate a plan.

* * *

_AN: I had this idea in my mind for the longest time, but I had been debating whether to set it before or after he came back... so I've decided to write a scene for each. The inspiration came when I re-watched Phase 33, the scene of the inquisition. I got SO angry at Sutherland's words, because he's saying that without Kira, and if they weren't involved with Kira, Heliopolis wouldn't have been destroyed, blah-blah-blah, and everything was Murrue's fault because she let him into the Strike. I wanted to slap him (actually I half-expected Mwu to go up and punch him...), because he fails to see that without Kira, and him being a Coordinator, they'd all be dead, 'cause Miguel would've captured the Strike, and killed Murrue in the process (actually, without Kira, Athrun wouldn't have hesitated when he was about to kill Murrue...). and without Kira, the Archangel would be done for. So anyway, Mwu's words there are just my rants about stupid Sutherland's words..._

_Another thing I put in here was Murrue blaming herself for dragging Kira and his friends into the war, because I've always wondered if she feels guilty about that, esp seeing how Kira always agonizes about fighting (though he never outright blamed Murrue), and how Tolle died so young. I know that Murrue's a stronger captain and more sure of herself than I made her out to be, but I'm sure she probably wonders/agonizes once in a while... and that scene in Phase 31 with Mwu watching Milly cry in the hanger, and seeing the expression on his face, it just broke my heart..._

_And another thing, I didn't want Mwu to just tell Murrue "It's okay, it's not your fault" or "You didn't make a mistake", because I see Mwu as the sort of person to give others a reality check, even if he has to be blunt/rude about it (judging from his words to the rebels, to Kira, and to Athrun in Phase 41). and rather than having him comfort her with false assurances, I think the words I used would have a bigger impact. But that's what I love most about the Mwurrue relationship, the fact that he's always there to cheer her up and put her mind at ease, to relieve her stress. and towards the end, we see the tables turn a bit as she started to do the same for him._

_Hmm, it didn't quite flow from one issue to another as smoothly as I had hoped, and I probably repeated/contradicted myself a lot... oh well. As for the ending, I just have this feeling that Mwu had never intended to leave in the first place, I get the feeling that he had planned to come back shortly after he'd been told about the transfer._

_(phew, this AN's getting long... sorry for the ranting...)_


	14. Fear

**Title/theme: **FEAR  
**Genre: **angst  
**Approx time line: **During GS, AU after SEED, or after GSDestiny  
**Summary: **_She looked up at him, eyes still full of terror, tears streaming down her pale cheeks. _

------------

A whimpered escaped the woman as she stirred in her sleep. He paused in his work and turned to look at her with a worried expression as she tossed and turned on the mattress.

"No! Don't go!" she cried out suddenly, the sound so full of sorrow and anguish that it broke his heart.

He quickly abandoned what he had been doing and raced to her side, his heart pounding. He sat on the bed and lifted her so that she was in his arms. Her body felt like ice to him. He could feel the rapid beating of a heart, whether it was hers or his own, he couldn't tell. Shaking her gently, he tried to wake her up.

Amber eyes opened and looked at him with a vacant stare. For a moment, she didn't seem to recognize him, as she seemed to look past him.

"Murrue!" he gently shook her shoulders again, trying to get her to snap out of it.

It seemed to work, as life returned to those eyes. Tears began to gather as she shifted, sitting up in his embrace. Wrapping her arms tightly around his neck, she wept into his chest. Her small frame was trembling with fear and her sobs.

"Shh… It's over now, it's just a dream," he told her as he tried to calm her down as well as slow down his own racing heart.

After getting over her initial shock, her sobs subsided. She looked up at him, eyes still full of terror, tears streaming down her pale cheeks.

"Mwu…I…" she choked out through her hiccups, "I, I love you…"

"I know," he gently kissed away her tears.

"I…love…you…so much…" her grip on him tightened. "Please…please don't…don't leave me!"

The eyes that stared up at him held such panic and despair. He could only stare back, not knowing what to do, what to say.

More than anything, he wanted to tell her, tell her that everything was going to be all right, that he would never leave her.

He _wanted_ to, but looking into her frightened, tearstained face, he couldn't. He couldn't lie to her, because he knew that in this world that they lived in, either one of them could die so easily.

So he did the only thing he could. He held her tightly, soothing her—and himself—by running his hands up and down her back, and prayed that he wouldn't have to leave her.

* * *

_AN: more Murrue angst, inspired by a quote from "Never I do, Never die" by Alone in a New Place._


	15. Seeing You Off

_AN: here's my version of the hanger scene. I seem to be on an angst kick... but I like writing angst... (yeah I'm weird, I know...)_

* * *

**Title/theme: **SEEING YOU OFF  
**Genre: **angst  
**Approx time line: **Phase 48 of GS  
**Summary: **_She did remember what he'd told her, but still, she wanted to be selfish, wanted him to stay with her._

--------------------

The captain of the Archangel rushed through the halls of the bustling warship, a sense of urgency within her. She had just come back from a meeting on the Eternal, adrenaline pumping through her as she thought about what was to come. They had come this far, and it was time that they ended this pointless conflict. Everyone was getting ready for the final battle, and she knew that she should be getting ready to lead the ship, but there was one thing that she absolutely had to do before she assumed her position, and she had to hurry.

Like everyone else, Mwu La Flaga was preparing as well, checking over everything to make sure that the Strike was ready. A small beeping noise caught his attention. He looked up and saw her floating towards him on the Strike's camera.

"What the?" he muttered to himself, surprised at seeing her in the hanger. He took off his helmet and opened the door of the cockpit.

"What are you doing here?" he asked as he caught her.

"Phew, I was afraid I wouldn't make it in time," she sounded a bit winded.

He chuckled. "In time for what silly!"

But she didn't share his laughter. Instead of answering, she lowered her gaze and bit her lower lip. The silver, coffin-shaped pendant escaped from under her uniform and floated up between them, catching his attention.

He reached out and gently touched it. "Was he a mobile armour pilot?" he asked gently. She nodded, still not meeting his gaze, and he noticed the lingering sadness and slight fear in her eyes.

He understood. He understood why she'd come, and why she was afraid that she wouldn't make it to see him off.

"Don't look so worried," he brushed her cheek with a gloved hand.

She looked up and opened her mouth, about to say something, but thought better of it and turned her gaze away, the anxiety still evident in her eyes. He didn't like her looking so worried. So he brought her closer and turned her head slightly so that she locked her gaze with his. There was such gentleness and love in his deep blue eyes, and she felt some of her sadness melt away.

"I'll be right back, with victory in my hands."

He reached down and brought her face close. Her eyes fluttered shut as he caressed her lips with his. She embraced him as he entwined his fingers in her dark hair, deepening the kiss. There were other people in the hanger, but right at the moment, they didn't care who saw them. This moment was theirs, and theirs alone. And neither had wanted it to end.

But like everything in life, all good things must come to an end. Their tender moment was interrupted by the sound of the intercom echoing in the hanger.

"Captain Ramius to the bridge," it said, repeating the message a few times before becoming silent once again.

"Well, they're calling for you," he told her, flashing her his usual grin. His smile faded when he saw that something was still bothering her.

"Murrue?"

"I-I don't want to…yet," she mumbled, and he only managed to catch pieces of what she said.

"Don't want to what?" he asked softly.

She looked up, eyes pleading. "Are you sure you don't want to stay here with me? We can use your help on the bridge," she tried.

Mwu sighed softly. So that's what this is about.

Caressing her cheek softly with the back of his hand, he shook his head.

"I'm sorry Murrue, but they need me out there even more. Remembered what I said before?"

Her eyes strayed from his again and nodded slightly. Yes, she did remember what he'd told her, but still, she wanted to be selfish, wanted him to stay with her. She buried her face on his shoulder and held him tightly, afraid to let go.

The intercom came again, calling her to her duties.

She didn't know what she was doing, why she was being so childish and selfish, and even abandoning her duties. If Natarle were here, surely she'd be yelling at her already, telling her to get back to work. But Natarle wasn't here, she was now an enemy, and Murrue had to fight her former comrade.

But she didn't want to go, to let him go, even though she knew she _had_ to. She was afraid, afraid that he'd leave her. _Besides, didn't he always come back to me?_ she reminded herself. _And it's not like he's never been out there fighting before_, she reasoned.

"Come on Murrue," his voice whispered in her ear, "They need you there, and I have to go soon."

"But—"

He cut off her protest with a gentle kiss.

"Please? You know I can't stay in here. You have your duties, and I have mine."

She should be understanding what he was telling her, and her mind had relented. But her body wouldn't listen to her, it wouldn't move, wouldn't release him.

"At this rate, the only way I can fight is if I take you with me," he joked half-heartedly. She didn't smile, the same anxiety on her face.

He sighed. He knew that nothing he could say could erase her anxiety.

"I know it's hard, but please stay strong for just a while longer. Lets end this together," he smiled softly. "Then you never have to let me go."

She nodded, and didn't protest when he gently removed her arms from clutching tightly around him.

"Besides, aren't you forgetting that I'm the man who—"

"Stop it!" she cut him off, "Stop _saying_ that!" She looked at him, slightly irritated.

For once, he was the one speechless. He looked away, knowing that he'd upset her.

A moment of silence passed between them as Murrue struggled to keep her emotions under control.

"Look, I just," she broke the silence, fighting to keep her voice even, "I just don't want you to be reckless out there, okay?"

He smiled softly in understanding. "I won't. I promise."

As he disappeared inside the cockpit of the Strike after a final kiss, she prayed that this would not be the last time she'd see him.

_Please be safe._

* * *

_AN: I've wanted to write this scene for some time now, the one in the series was too short, I feel there should be more to it. This one kinda ties in with "Assurance" with the things he said to her._

_I think there's some foreshadowing with the fact that they put this scene in the series, because he's fought countless times before, but she doesn't go to see him off, so I put some foreshadowing/irony in this too._

_You know, I went back and checked. In the dubbed version and the subbed version that I saw, he never actually used the word "Promise" when he was talking about how he will come back (or it could be a translation thing...). but at the beginning of phase 50, Murrue does say "but you promised me...", so it made me think that maybe he promised something else._

_ugh, I think I made Murrue ooc again. she's a lot stronger than I usually make her out to be (well, at least she didn't cry this time...), in the scene, she didn't look as scared or worried (or desperate/clingy) as I made her out to be._


	16. Reunion

_AN: originally I was only going to write canon scenes from SEED, with the "original" Mwu, but this reunion scene just entered my head one night and refuses to go away until I write it down... So, may contain spoilers from Destiny for those who haven't seen it yet..._

* * *

**Title/theme: **REUNION  
**Genre: **Fluffy/humour/angst  
**Approx time line: **After GSDestiny  
**Summary: **"_What's this, a welcoming party?" he smiled, his eyes full of recognition and love as he gazed at the woman before him. _

----------------------------

Murrue Ramius sighed in relief, it was finally over. She looked around, waiting impatiently for arrangements to be made so she could leave the bridge to attend to a very important—well, important to her—business.

The bridge crew could see her anxiety and they stifled a chuckle, they knew why she was so impatient.

"Captain?" Neumann turned around at his seat at the front of the bridge to face her.

"Yes?" she answered absent-mindedly, tapping her fingers on the armrest of her chair as she struggled to keep her excitement under control.

"You can go ahead, we'll take care of things."

That got her attention. She looked around in surprise, and everyone else on the bridge nodded, a knowing smile on their faces.

Looking a bit flustered and embarrassed, she slowly stood up. "I-I couldn't, I still have work to do."

"It's okay Captain, we know where you want to be," Miriallia winked at her, "We can handle things." The crew nodded again, and thwarted any feeble protests that she made.

"T-Thank you everyone, and um, I'm sorry." With that, she entered the elevator.

As soon as the doors to the elevator opened, she rushed out and headed for the hanger as fast as she could go. She wished that she could run; sometimes gravity proved to be useful. Her heart pounded in excitement as she imagined the meeting.

"_I'm alright," his face had come up on the monitor, "I'm not going anywhere anymore. Let's finish this and go home, Murrue!" _

She had been afraid, so afraid when she saw the beam of energy from Minerva coming at her, and the golden Gundam throwing itself in its path to take the blow. Déjà vu. She had felt her stomach churn and her knees feel weak as that horrible moment from the past played back in her mind. _Not again! _

But this time, he had made it, with the help of a better-equipped machine. And she smiled as she recalled the way he said her name.

The young captain entered the hanger just in time to see the golden Gundam land in its spot. Remembering seeing the vacant spot left by the Strike, she pinched herself to make sure that she wasn't dreaming.

Ignoring protests by several mechanics, she pushed herself off the floor and floated in the low gravity of the hanger towards the cockpit. Just as she got there, the door opened, revealing a young man wearing a purple pilot suit. He stood up and removed his helmet, revealing his long dirty-blond locks.

"Murrue?" He was slightly surprised at seeing her here because she rarely came to the hanger. But his usual grin spread across his features as soon as the moment of surprise passed.

"What's this, a welcoming party?" he smiled, his eyes full of recognition and love as he gazed at the woman before him. _My dear Murrue… _

She was in such a rush to get here to see him, but now that he was here in front of her, she suddenly felt shy.

But before she could have a chance to overcome her shyness, she was pulled into his embrace.

"See? Didn't I tell you that I'd come back?" he whispered softly in her ear.

Murrue cried. She couldn't help herself as tears gathered in her eyes and floated away in blobs in the low gravity.

"You stupid irresponsible _jerk_!" she cried out, burying her head on his shoulder and pounded her fist on his chest in time to each word. "You _selfish_ moron! First you made me fall in love with you, then you just..._leave_ me all alone!" Her pain, fear and anguish from the past two years that she'd kept bottled up spilled out with her tears. "And when I finally thought you came back to me, you..." Her frame shook with sobs, and he held her tighter, soothing her as he stroked her back.

"I-I thought…I was…going to…going to lose you again…" she managed to choke out between sobs. "You're _such_ a reckless _idiot_!"

"I know," he answered softly, "But I'm back aren't I?"

Her sobs subsided, and the strength in her fist weakened until it stopped, as she wrapped her arms around his neck. Her tears didn't stop, but these were tears of relief and joy.

"Why do you always have to be so heroic?" she mumbled into his shoulder.

He gently lifted her face so that her tear-filled eyes met his shining blue ones. She noticed that there was a wetness in his eyes, though she knew he'd never admit it.

"I'm sorry Murrue, I really am," he said sincerely before he kissed her through her tears. "I, I put you through so much pain…" he looked away. She could see the pain in his eyes and took his hand in hers and gave a gentle squeeze.

"But in the end, you did come back to me," she whispered, more tears spilled out with her words.

"Please don't cry anymore." He wiped her tears away with the cloth from his gloves. She nodded, still hiccupping slightly, kind of embarrassed at her display of emotions.

"Come on, let's go celebrate," he said as he released her from his embrace. Leading her by the hand, he floated towards the exit. They headed for the bridge, hand in hand. Neither said anything, enjoying the silent company of the other.

"So," he stated, breaking the silence, "I'm a stupid irresponsible jerk eh?" He glanced down at her, familiar twinkle in his eyes.

She looked up, playful smile matching his.

"Yes, yes you are. And you're also selfish, loud, immature, cocky, rude—"

"Okay, okay!" he laughed as he held up his hands in surrender, "I get it already, Miss Perfect!"

Then he moved his face closer to hers, blue eyes laughing. "But you still love me, right?"

"Yes," she giggled as she kissed him. "You're still lovable."

* * *

_AN: So here it is, my version of their reunion. In a way, I'm kinda glad that the reunion wasn't in Destiny, 'cause it gives us fanfic authors more room to improvise and come up with our own scenes..._

_Oh boy, I made Murrue ooc again... I think her actions are more like something Cagalli would do... but it's rather fun to have her call Mwu a "stupid irresponsible jerk" and "reckless idiot" :D. And I couldn't help but put that ending there XD, lets just say that she's giddy from having him back..._


	17. Illusion

_AN: angst warning! I think this is the most angsty one so far, but it was bugging me to get written._

_This is sort of a semi-songfic, the bold italic lines are from the song "I Wanna Go to a Place" by Rie Fu (GSDestiny third ending song). Those lines are sung in English, so no translation was required._

* * *

**Title/theme: **ILLUSION  
**Genre: **pure angst  
**Approx time line: **After GS  
**Summary: **"_And every time I look, I thought you were there"_

--------------

Captain Ramius breathed a sigh of relief. The battle was finally over, and she had just gotten the news that Genesis had been destroyed, and that Kira was okay. She removed her hands from the armrest of her chair, realizing just now that she had been clutching on so tightly that her knuckles were white.

She stood up, body stiff and mind numb.

"Good job, everyone!" she called out to everyone on the bridge with false cheerfulness. As she made her way to the elevator, she could feel everyone's gaze on her, as if asking if she was okay. Thankfully, nobody said anything aloud, because she didn't know if she could reply without breaking down.

Throughout the dialogue with the other two ships immediately after the ceasefire, she had managed to keep her emotions at bay and her voice even. She had managed to push her thoughts about what had just happened aside for business talks. She would, and did, stay strong until the end, because she was the captain. And she promised herself that she would remain strong, and not let anyone see her tears.

The elevator door opened and she stepped into the corridor. She didn't quite know where she was going, but she knew that she didn't want to stay on the bridge longer than she had to. She forced herself to keep her mind blank, to not think about it. It wasn't that difficult, since her mind had turned numb.

Her feet carried her to a familiar closed door. Before she knew what she was doing, she punched the code and the door swished open.

She peered inside. Everything was left in its place, as if waiting for him to come back. Her eyes found an Earth Alliance cap lying un-ceremonially in a corner. She remembered that he never did like to wear the hat, the only time she'd seen him wear it was in Alaska, when—

She had to stop herself there, forcing the thought away. She bit her lower lip to stop it from trembling. For she promised herself that she wouldn't cry.

Murrue quickly rushed out of the room. No, this place wasn't the best place to not think about it. It wasn't much better than the bridge.

Feeling suddenly weary, she ran to her room and lay on her bed, squeezing her eyes shut and concentrated on making her mind go blank.

But the darkness had provided no distractions, and her mind wondered back to her memories. She had wanted to get up and do something, to distract herself, but her body wouldn't let her, it protested that she was tired and needed rest.

She dreamt of him in her restless slumber. The reoccurring nightmare played back over and over in her mind, even though she tried her best _not to think_ about it. She woke up, laying there in the darkness, afraid to lose herself to sleep for fear of the nightmare again. Instead, she tried to think of all the happy times she had with him.

--

**_I wanna go to a place where I can say  
That I'm all right and I'm staying there with you._**

--

She remembered how happy she was when he showed up out of nowhere when they were trying to defend Alaska, how after getting over her initial surprise, her heart had lifted when he had called to her and ran to her side. And later, when she asked him why he came back, he had responded by kissing her. She didn't know which surprised her more: the fact that he came back for _her_, or the fact that she kissed him back.

_But this is what you wanted, right?_

She had been trying to push him away, because he was a soldier. She reminded herself that she would not make _that_ mistake again. No, unlike the rest of the world, she would learn from the past to make sure that history wouldn't repeat itself, the coffin-shaped pendent was a constant reminder of that.

But she forgot, he had made her forget.

She had hidden her heart away, underneath her military uniform. But Mwu La Flaga really was the man who could make the impossible possible, for he somehow broke through the walls of military code, and around her heart. Or maybe, she had make it easy for him, because inside, she could not change the fact that she too, was human, that inside, she was just a woman who wanted, _needed_, love. She needed him to be there for her, to support her in the way that only he could, to chase her nightmares away and warm her heart with his smile, his embrace, his kiss. So she welcomed him into her heart, taking the chance even though she knew her heart could break again.

And look where it got her.

She took the chance, and fate had failed her.

Murrue let out a bitter laugh. What did she expect? She had known all along that this could happen. After all, they were living in a war-torn world, where a precious life could be taken away in a matter of seconds.

_Why did you have to leave me?_

She supposed that she should hate him, hate him for making her fall in love with him, then leaving her all alone; hate him for breaking his promise to her. But it was also her fault for letting him in so easily, her fault for not being able to protect her heart. If only she could see the future. If only she'd known it'd end up like this.

But looking deep into her heart, she knew that she couldn't hate him, she could never hate him. Because she was glad that she hadn't been able to see the future back then, and even though she kicked herself for doing so, she was glad that they had met and fell in love. Because he had brought her happiness, if only for a short while. For a short while, she was in a place where she was content because she was with him.

--

**_I wanna know if there could be any way  
That there's no fight, and I'm safe and sound with you._**

**_  
_**--

They never really talked about the future, being more content in thinking about the present. It was easier that way, daydreaming was too distracting. They hadn't dared to hope what would happen _when this is over_, because war was unpredictable as it was unreasonable. So even though they all worked for that day when the fighting ends, they didn't think about what would happen after.

But during the silence between battles, she couldn't help but feel excited and wonder slightly about the future despite protests from her rational mind, dreaming about the promise of finally being able to spent time with him, fantasizing how they can just be "Murrue" and "Mwu" instead of "Captain" and "Commander".

Most times, she chose not to think about the future, choosing to distract herself with current battle strategies because she was afraid that if she did, she would get her hopes up too high, and would fall harder; because she didn't want to disappoint herself; because if it couldn't happen, her heart would break again. And every time she thought about how everything would be right, a part of her mind would think about everything that could go wrong. Her mind was trained for this, as part of the military, she learned to expect and prepare for the worst.

But even though she prepared herself mentally, if unconsciously, for the worst case possible, what had happened still came as a shock. She found her questioning herself countless times, _Is this real?_

--

_**And every time I look, I thought you were there,  
But it was just my imagination.**_

**_--_**

She always seemed to be losing him; her heart seemed to always break for him. She thought she had lost him in Alaska, and that they were to never meet again, her heart breaking as he walked away from her. But he came back for her, and mended her heart.

With that mindset, many times she found herself half-expecting to see him standing there, grinning at her, or assuring her from his usual place behind the captain's chair. But when she did a double take and reached out to touch him, reality would come crashing down on her as she realized that she was alone, that her fists clutched only air.

"_I knew I could make the impossible possible!"_

When she had heard his crackling voice over the intercom, sounding so nonchalant, as if it was no big deal, then disappearing with the Strike, her heart finally shattered as tears escaped her eyes. Because she knew that even though Mwu had always said he could make the impossible possible, Death was one thing that he could not overcome, one thing that he couldn't make possible.

But she would learn to cope. She was strong, right?

Getting up, she put on her uniform and left her room, feeling the need to clear her head. She was thinking too much again.

She wondered around the ship aimlessly, avoiding the people who passed by. And they, understanding her feelings, said nothing to her. This ship held so many memories. His presence was everywhere on this ship, haunting her, yet she was strangely comforted by it. She reached out a hand to touch the cool metal of the corridors, remembering how it used to echo with his voice and merry laughter. In times of war, he was somehow always able to make this place seem less dreary and brought light to the tough situations. Now, she didn't know what to do. He had always managed to take a load off her shoulders, cheer her up, and if only for a moment, forget the stress as the captain of the "legged ship".

Her feet had taken her to the hanger. She stared at the empty dock of the Strike and felt her heart clench. The Strike had left a void in the hanger, just as he had left a void in her heart. In her mind's eye, she replayed when she had come to see him off.

"_Don't worry, I'll be right back, with victory in hand."_

He had kissed her then, _his last kiss_, and she could still feel it on her lips.

It was the last time she'd ever saw him, she suddenly realized. It finally seemed to sink in that he would never come back, never to be with her again. Tears stung at her eyes, and she quickly wiped them away. She would stay strong. But nevertheless, she left the hanger quickly, feeling the need to get away from those thoughts and memories for a while.

Without realizing it, she had wondered into the locker room. It was her first time in here actually, but it was a place where he had spent a lot of time. Absent-mindedly, she started opening the lockers. Most were empty, as they had more lockers than pilots. But when she opened one, her tears threatened to spill again as her heart tightened.

There, in the open locker, hung an Earth Alliance uniform.

With trembling hands, she reached for it. As she almost reached it, her hand recoiled a bit, as if afraid to touch it, afraid that it was just another ghostly image, a creation of her mind, an illusion.

Her fingers came into contact with the soft fabric, and slowly, she bunched the material in her hands, assuring her mind that it was indeed real. Gently, she lifted it off its hook.

She stroked it in wonder. A single tear escaped her eyes and landed on the black shoulder band that marked his ranking.

She buried her face in the soft material, taking in its scent. It still held his scent, coupled with the smell of detergent. Tears fell from her eyes, soaking into the fabric as she cried silently.

A clank of an object hitting the floor caught her attention. She looked up from the uniform turned her gaze to the floor. Her eyes caught a small black velvet box. She deduced that it must've fell from the pocket of the coat.

She gently set down the uniform on the bench, and kneeling down, she picked up the object with trembling fingers. She turned the box in her fingers, feeling the softness of the velvet. Her heart pounded as she proceeded to opening it, whether from excitement or fear, she didn't know. The box clicked open, and she felt her throat tighten.

Inside, was a beautiful golden ring with a single diamond.

It was then, that she finally gave up trying to hold her emotions back as tears spilled freely from her eyes, floating in the low gravity like drops of diamond. She knelt there on the floor, her shoulders shaking uncontrollably as she wept.

She tilted her head back, sitting against the lockers for support as she struggled to breath through the choking tears. In her hands, she clutched the black box tightly. One thing ran through her mind at that moment.

_Why…_

--

_**I wanna go to a place where I can say  
That I'm all right and I'm staying there with you.**_

--

The battles and fighting had finally ceased. The day that they'd both been looking forward to, the time that she was supposed to be spending with him was finally here. But now that it had arrived, she didn't know what to do. She had nowhere to go, no one to spend the peaceful times with.

_The world has its peace, but where's **my** peace?_

* * *

_AN: I think that was the most angsty one. I like writing angst (hides behind Mwu from the rotten vegetables being thrown) because it comes so easily. I've been wanting to write the after scene for a while. and those first few lines of "I wanna go to a place" (beautiful song) immediately made me think of Mwu and Murrue._

_the locker room scene was inspired by Phase 30 of SEED, the scene where Athrun was crying into Nicol's uniform, and then those sheets of music tumbled out._

_also, the illusion idea came from the after SEED OVA, when there was a10 second scene with Murrue sitting in her living room drinking coffee, then on an opposite chair,sat a see-through, ghostly image of Mwu, smiling at her and raising his mug to her. that scene just broke my heart TT_


	18. Parting

**Title/theme: **PARTING  
**Genre: **slight angst  
**Approx time line: **Phase 32-33 of GS  
**Summary: **_She tried to bury the regret creeping into her mind that he would never know how she truly felt._

-----------------

A loud, beeping sound woke Murrue rudely from her slumber. She reached out, hand flapping to find the snooze button to turn the obnoxious sound off. She had finally gotten to sleep after her thoughts had kept her awake for so long, and she didn't want to open her eyes.

The sound came again. With a frustrated groan, she cracked open an eye and glanced at the device beside her bed with annoyance, only to have her eyes pop open as she read the time.

7:15

Oh no!

She sprung out of bed, hastily getting dressed. She didn't want to be late.

As she got over her initial panic and gotten fully dressed, the thoughts that kept her awake last night came back with a vengeance and hung over her like a gloomy cloud.

Today was the day, the day that she'd been dreading, the day that they were to part ways.

She checked in the mirror hastily to make sure that there were no signs of tears, and that her eyes weren't red. After a deep breath, she walked out of her room, mentally preparing herself so that she would not cry when she would bid him goodbye.

They were supposed to meet at the exit at 7:30, where she as the captain would see her three crewmembers disembark. As she headed there, she kept her mind blank, making herself think of anything but the fact that he was leaving.

When she first heard the news of his transfer, she was surprised and disappointed. But it wasn't until that he came in to talk to her after the inquisition, checking on her to make sure that she was all right, that she realized just how much she needed him, how much she really cared for him, and how much she didn't want him to leave.

_Great timing Murrue!_

She was so lost in thought that she didn't realize someone else was in the hallway until she bumped into him. Instinctively, she put her hands out and shoved the person away to keep her balance.

"Woah there Cap'n!" his smiling face turned to her as he caught his hat that was knocked off when she pushed him.

"Are you that eager to get rid of me?" he chuckled.

He immediately regretted saying that as she turned and hid her face, biting her lower lip.

"Wait, I, I didn't mean that. I mean, I was just joking." He tried to look at her face, to see if she was angry or not. She turned back to him, eyes dry, and a cheerful smile on her face. _Too_ cheerful it seemed, but he didn't say anything.

"I see you're all ready and packed," she stated as she eyed him. For once, he was wearing his uniform right, with his collar done up, his hat on his head, and his sleeves…

With an exasperated sigh, she reached over and pulled down his rolled-up sleeves and smoothed them out.

"Come on, can't you wear your uniform properly? Your superiors will get angry."

He grinned. "I guess I've been spoiled here, since my superior never yelled at me for it."

"Well, maybe I should have!" she humphed and turned away, starting to walk down the hall again. "Come on, you're going to be late."

He stared at her back for a moment, dumbfounded, before shouldering his bag and followed.

On the way, they walked in silence. She kept her head down so she wouldn't see how depressed she was, and how hard she was trying to hold her tears back. He didn't need to see, because he'd only worry, and there was no point in him knowing since he'd be leaving in a few minutes anyway. She had to bite her lip again at that thought. No, she was the captain; she wouldn't let anyone see her tears, especially not him. What would the others think of her if she was so emotional over something like this!

He watched her, eyebrows knitted. Even though she tried to hide it, he could still tell that something was not right. She seemed as depressed and worried as he was, but he didn't ask, knowing that she would just deny it. Instead, he occasionally made joking comments, hoping to cheer her up, but gave up and fell silent as he realized that she was in no mood for jokes.

"Captain," he called gently as he placed a hand on her shoulder, stopping her. He could feel her stiffen as she turned to look at him.

"Yes?"

"Are you, going to be all right?"

A pause.

"Yes," she answered, voice firm and assured. In truth, she was far from all right. She already lost one guardian angel for the ship, and now she was about to lose another, as well as her combat commander. How would she ever manage on her own? On top of that, she was trying to hide her feelings and remain professional despite the fact that what she really wanted to do was to cling to him and beg him not to go. But this time, she did not have the authority to stop him, no matter how much she wanted to. She tried to bury the regret creeping into her mind that he would never know how she truly felt.

"I, I want to thank you," she said instead, at least she would let him know her feelings as a captain.

He looked up, in surprise, confusion replacing the concern in his eyes. "What for?"

"For protecting and taking care of this ship until now," _and for supporting and caring for me until now._ She forced the stinging of tears away and flashed a grateful smile. "I really can't thank you enough."

He smiled softly. "No, I should be thank you."

"Eh?" it was her turn to be confused.

Instead of answering, he pulled her into his arms and held her tightly.

"It's going to be okay Captain," he whispered into her hair, "I know you'll be fine. You're more than capable of taking care of things."

His words and his arms felt so comforting. Tears trailed down her cheeks at that thought, tears that she desperately tried to hold back. Quickly, she wiped them away with her sleeve, hoping that he didn't notice.

"I sure hope so, Commander," she whispered back as she returned his embrace, wishing that time would stand still, that it would grant her just a few more moments with him.

* * *

_AN: well, that was my version of the goodbye scene. I really love that scene, how she was trying to hold back her tears, and he looked really sad for once. and I wanted her to thank him in a more private scene instead of in front of everyone. This one kinda ties into chapter 13: Understanding._


	19. Abandoning

_AN: kinda follows previous chapter_

* * *

**Title/theme: **ABANDONING  
**Genre: **general  
**Approx time line: **Phase 33 of GS  
**Summary: **"_I need to go back, I forgot to do something!" he answered as he ran away._

----------------------

"I'm fine."

As he walked away from the Archangel, shouldering his bag, he remembered the look on her face.

_No you're not, you're not fine at all._

Even though she tried her best to hide her tears and sadness, he could still see them there. He'd come to know her emotions too well.

He sighed. There was nothing either of them could do, even if they wanted to. Just as she predicted, the Personnel Office was no help, they repeatedly told him how important how his next assignment was, and how his duties aboard the Archangel had come to an end, until he got frustrated and gave up trying to reason with them. There was only one choice left: he had to take matters into his own hands.

After saying goodbye to Natarle with a handshake and "I hope we can meet again someday", and giving instructions to that Fllay girl, he turned away from the line up.

"Wait, where are you going?" he heard the girl cry out.

"I need to go back, I forgot to do something!" he answered as he ran away. No, they were wrong, his duties aboard the Archangel were far from ending.

Perhaps he was worried about her, worried that she would not be able to manage on her own. But he knew that she was more than capable to take care of herself and the ship. So why was he running away from his duties?

Because he was selfish, because of his selfish desire to be with her.

He knew that he was deserting, abandoning his duties and neglecting his responsibilities to the military in order to fulfill his selfish desires. But he didn't want to leave her, and knew that she felt the same. So in a rash act, he chose to be selfish.

As he ran through the base, he felt that something was amiss. The base was surprisingly empty, save for the people boarding to leave. He imagined the headquarters would be much busier. Sure they sent the main troops to Panama, but there should be people here to command the base.

He stopped as he suddenly felt a familiar tingle in his mind.

_Rau Le Creuset! Here? Why?_

Taking his gun out, he crept towards the source of the feeling. There, in the dark, abandoned room, was the masked man, leaning over a computer.

As Mwu was about to shoot, it seemed that Rau had sensed him as well. He turned around and fired a few shots before running to another door. Mwu entered the room and hid behind the computer, waiting for an opportunity to shoot.

Rau chuckled. "Still here? Then it must mean that your uses to the Earth forces have come to an end. Oh Hawk of Endymion, how the mighty have fallen!"

Angry, Mwu stood up and fired a few shots at him.

"Sorry, but no time to chat!" the masked man laughed and took off.

Mwu was about to chase after him when something on the computer screen caught his eye. He looked and his eyes widened as he took in the information.

_Cyclops system! Damn it, the Archangel!_

Realization hit him and he took off running. Now it was urgent that he _had_ to go back; he had to warn them to leave.

He wasn't sure how or where he was going to find the Archangel amongst the chaos, but he would find a way, he always did. After all, Mwu La Flaga made the impossible possible.

As he ran through the streets of JOSH-A, only one thing was on his mind.

_Please hang in there Archangel, I'm coming. Wait for me, Murrue!_

* * *

_AN: I have a feeling that Mwu had all of this planned out, that he hadn't planned on boarding the submarine at all. I find it ironic that it was Rau who tipped him off about the cyclops system..._

_the ending was inspired by the fact that he always seemed to say "don't let them get you before I come back" :)_


	20. Alive

_AN: wow, 20 chapters already! thanks everyone for the support!_

_I don't usually like to write AU, I prefer canon, but this is another idea that had been nagging at me, so here it is._

* * *

**Title/theme: **ALIVE  
**Genre: **slight angst  
**Approx time line: **AU after GS  
**Summary: **_She sat by his side, contending herself to watching the gentle rise and fall of his chest, assuring her mind that he was still alive._

-----------------

Murrue stared at the man lying there on the Archangel infirmary bed and felt hot tears gather and spill out from her eyes. She didn't know whether they were tears of relief and joy, or tears of fear and anxiety.

The man in front of her was covered from head to toe in bandages. Even his face was covered, revealing only his eyes, which were tightly shut. A machine beside the bed was aiding in his breathing. If you didn't look closely enough, you'd probably think that he wasn't breathing at all, for his chest moved only the slightest with his shallow, raspy breaths.

When Murrue first heard the news that they managed to find his body floating in outer space, alive—though barely, she almost cried with relief. And if it wasn't for the fact that she still had business to take care of as the captain, she would have rushed straight to the infirmary the moment they brought him in. _Somehow, he managed to survive!_

But in a way, she was glad that she didn't, because as the doors swished open, revealing him lying unconscious on the bed, her heart almost stopped at the sight of him covered in so much bandaging. She realized that she probably would have fainted if she had seen him in his bloodied and broken state.

It had been a week since they found him, and peace talks have been well under way. The Archangel was getting ready for its descent to Orb. As the captain, Murrue was pretty busy getting things in order. So despite her anxiety, she pushed her personal business and feelings aside for the moment to complete her duties.

However, she spent every moment that she was off duty sitting by his side, contending herself to watching the gentle rise and fall of his chest, assuring her mind that he was still alive, and calming her nerves .

Occasionally, she would reach out and gently touch his bandaged body, as if to assure her mind that this was real, that he was really there, and not just some illusion her weary mind had created. But she would always quickly remove her fingers right after it made contact, as if afraid that he would shatter if she touched him for too long.

She stayed with him and watched him, looking away only when the doctors came to change his bandages. She couldn't stand the sight; her body and mind could not accept it, she learned that after fainting the first time she saw his wounded body. Even though she'd seen plenty of carnage during the war and managed to stomach the sights, she couldn't stand the sight of her beloved in such pain, knowing how he had come to be in his condition, his every wound reminding her of her pain and fear after that horrible moment when the Strike had disappeared.

She stayed with him because she wanted to be the first thing that he would see if—no, _when_, her mind quickly corrected—_when_ he woke up.

She had overheard the doctors talking, and they weren't sure if he'd make it, given the severity of his injuries. When she asked them once, they looked at her sadly, and only said "We'll do our best". She thanked them and left it at that, knowing that his life was hanging by a thread. A part of her mind feared that he wouldn't wake up, but those thoughts had always been quickly pushed aside for more positive ones. He had somehow managed to survive the explosion up until now, so why was there any doubt that he wouldn't make it? He was strong, he would fight, just like he always did. And he did say that he could make the impossible possible, and if ever there was a time for that, now would be a good time. Besides, he said that he would return to her, and she trusted him. So for now, she pushed the doubts and fears into the farthest corners of her mind, and chose to let hope fill her heart, ignoring the nagging thought that she would just disappoint herself if things didn't go well. For now, she was content that he was _alive_.

One day, the day before their descent to Orb, in the middle of the night, when everyone except those few on duty—and Murrue—was sleeping, he opened his eyes.

She cried in joy and relief as she saw the familiar clear blueness staring back at her. She was so excited that only a part of her subconscious noted that there was something amiss in those blue orbs, but she pushed that tiny thought away like she did her fears, and chose to let joy fill her heart.

But that joy quickly turned to horror and sadness at his whispered words to her.

_Who are you?_

* * *

_AN: sorry for the angstiness, but it seemed to fit. anyway, I think I was a little bit influenced by Tsubasa RC, when Sakura woke up..._


	21. Annoyingly Charming

_AN: finally, some senseless fluff after all that angst._

* * *

**Title/theme: **ANNOYINGLY CHARMING  
**Genre: **fluff XD  
**Approx time line: **during GS  
**Summary: **"_Why you…" she was at a loss for words. He was so…_

-----------------

The door slid open with a swish. The commander was just about to head for the mess hall to grab something to eat, when he caught something in the corner of his eye. He turned and saw her walking down the corridor, away from him, shoulders slumped. His brow furrowed. She looked tired and stressed again. So, he decided it was time to go to work.

He snuck up on her and stood to her side. Before she could react, he placed a hand on her shoulder and planted a kiss on her cheek.

He watched with amusement as her cheeks grew pink as her amber eyes widened.

"M-Mwu!" she protested, face full of surprise.

He just grinned at her, making her blush even more.

"N-Not here! Someone might see us!" she exclaimed.

"What, are you embarrassed to be seen with me?" he pouted, pretending to look hurt.

"Well, I, no, but," she stammered, struggling to think of a defence. "This isn't the time and place."

She looked so kissable standing there, looking up at him, face flushed, lips slightly puckered in irritation at his audacity and her own inability to come up with a good retort.

Why let a perfect opportunity go to waste?

Lifting her chin with his hand, he touched his lips to hers in a quick but passionate kiss.

"W-What the-I-how," she could only stutter as he released her, fully enjoying seeing her flustered as he grinned from ear-to-ear.

"D-Didn't you hear a word of what I said!" she huffed once her heart calmed down slightly, and when she had managed to find her voice.

"Nope," he leaned down and nuzzled her neck, "I was too busy looking at you."

"Why you…" she was at a loss for words. He was so…

He was as irritating as he was charming!

She didn't know whether to yell at him or let him go on. Her heart wanted him to go on, but her rational mind wouldn't let her. They were in the middle of the hallway after all, where people could easily see them, and she had to go back to work.

"Stop it, someone might see us," she hissed, eyes narrowing and pulling away as he let out a small whine.

He studied her face. "You know Cap'n, you're quite cute when you're angry."

Once again, she was speechless. She didn't know whether to feel offended or flattered at that comment.

"Stop changing the subject!" she ended up huffing.

He laughed. "Okay then, do you want to go to some place more…private?" he grinned, chuckling to himself at her reddening face.

"No!" she objected, more to convince herself than him.

"Please?"

She looked up at him and immediately regretted it. He had his puppy-dog expression on: eyes soft and pleading, though it seemed like he was holding back laughter, brows furrowed and lips pouting in feigned disappointment.

She sighed as she shook her head in defeat. He knew her weaknesses when it came to this, and he was not afraid to use it against her.

"Fine, you win," she sighed as she tried her best to keep the smile off her face and glare at the annoyingly charming commander.

She scowled at that overconfident grin of his as he claimed victory. But she found it hard to keep the scowl on her face as he wrapped her in a hug as if to thank her. She just couldn't stay angry at him when he was so happy.

A beeping sound interrupted her thoughts. She saw Mwu look at his watch.

"Oops, sorry Cap'n, but you'll have to wait for me," he winked. "I'm supposed to start my shift down at the hanger."

She stared at him, speechless as he released her. First he tempted her with affection, then when he finally convinced her to put away her shyness, he had to leave? He was always like this, leaving her hanging, breathless and at a loss for words.

After a quick kiss on her cheek, he left.

She scowled again at his laughing, retreating back. That man really _was_ annoying! But once again, she found that she could not keep the scowl on her face and the smile from creeping in.

Yes, a lot of times he annoyed her to no end, sometimes even going overboard. But he had always managed to put her in a better mood, like right now. She felt her previous stress and anxiety melt away as she laughed to herself at his antics.

The Archangel captain shook her head and chuckled as she walked back to the bridge, in a much better mood.

* * *

_AN: hehe, that was random, but wasn't it cute! I love how Murrue doesn't seem to know how to deal with him sometimes. I hope I captured Mwu's personality alright._

_This little fic was inspired by my first finished Mwu/Murrue fanart:_ www. deviantart. com/ view/ 28984462/

_I just started doodling one day while watching SEED, and ended up with this. then I thought, "hey, it looks like he just snuck up on her while she was walking in the hallway", and that became this little ficlet. _


	22. Birthday

**Title/theme: **BIRTHDAY  
**Summary: **_Today was his birthday_

------------------------

November 29th.

The date circled in red on the kitchen calendar stared back at the former warship captain.

_Today is the day._

She bustled around, trying to get everything ready and in order for the party starting soon. It was going to be just a small party with their closest friends, those who knew him best, but she wanted it to be perfect for him.

The doorbell rang as she was putting the finishing touches on the cake. Wiping her hands on her apron, she went to open the door.

"Oh, Kira-kun, Lacus-san! Welcome, please come in!" she gestured, smiling at the young boy and his date.

"Are you sure this is okay Murrue-san?" the young Coordinator boy asked, slight concern in his voice and on his face.

Murrue smiled softly. "Of course it is."

The teenagers entered and offered to help Murrue get ready, chattering idly while they waited for the other guests to arrive. One by one, they came and filled the house with their laughter. Murrue watched them, a serene smile on her face. It was good to live in peace. Ironically, even though the war had taken many lives and torn others apart, it also brought their lives together. Because of the war, they were able to meet and become friends.

Soon, lunch was served. They laughed and talked while eating, happily enjoying the company. Although the party was being thrown in his honour, it was also an excuse for friends to get together and celebrate peace.

The topic of the conversations ranged from how everyone was doing, to the latest technology and gadgets, to the food being served, to people's love lives—much to Kira's embarrassment—to news and current events. Finally, it settled on things concerning the birthday boy when the cake was brought in.

It was a beautiful and elegant cake, with white icing and purple trimmings shaped to look like feathers. A silhouette of a hawk in flight drawn in dark icing made up the background. In an elegant script written with purple icing, spelt the words "Happy Birthday". Twenty-eight candles stood to attention on the cake like soldiers lining up for inspection.

"Wow, twenty-eight, that's old!" Dearka remarked as the candles were being lit.

"For you guys maybe," Andrew Waltfeld chuckled, "Twenty-eight is not old at all!"

"That's because you're an old man yourself," snorted Dearka.

"Shh, stop arguing!" Miriallia held up a hand as Andy was about to retort, "The wax is gonna melt all over the cake."

And so, they all sang "Happy Birthday", or tried to, since Lacus was the only one who could sing on key, before all twenty-eight candles were blown out with the help of everyone.

As they devoured the cake, they talked about him and the good times they had. Kira smiled a bit as he remembered how the commander had guided the young boy and motivated him to fight, and how together, they protected the Archangel in its run from Heliopolis to Alaska. Murdock joked about the conversations he and the commander had in the hanger, some of which made the girls, and Kira, blush quite a bit. Andy remarked how the Hawk's tastes in kebob sauce was similar to his own, drawing a laugh from Kira as he remembered the Tiger's arguments with his sister. Dearka was made fun of for always getting picked on, and beaten, by the Hawk, despite the fact that he was using only a mobile armour and later, a fighter plane. Finally, it was Murrue's turn. She blushed slightly as she recounted how he had always cared and supported her, cheering the crew up with his carefree personality. And despite laughing encouragements from the others, she refused to share the juicy details of their more personal relationship.

The house echoed with the laughter of friends, and for that day, it seemed that the chair at the end of the table wasn't empty at all. The memories of friends floated around and surrounded the table. For that day, it seemed that Mwu La Flaga was there, laughing and joking with friends.

* * *

_AN: You guys probably hate me now --;;, but this in another one of those stories that wanted to be written down. I checked the official website, and the second battle of Jakin Due ended on Sept 27, well before his b-day._

_this one, like chapter 17 "Illusion", had part inspiration by that 10 sec scene in the after SEED OVA, where we see Murrue sitting in her house drinking coffee, and a ghostly Mwu sitting across from her, smiling and raising his cup. that scene just broke my heart..._


	23. Injured

_AN: sorry for the long delay, having editing/tweaking issues..._

* * *

**Title/theme: **INJURED  
**Genre: **Serious  
**Approx time line: **Phase 46 of GS  
**Summary: **"

------------------

Murrue Ramius breathed a sigh of relief as the enemy disappeared from their radar. Finally, they had a moment of peace.

Calling out a few instructions for the crew to keep watch, she exited the bridge and headed for the infirmary. She felt a sudden anxiety to get there quickly, to see if he was all right.

She was scared when she heard Kira's voice over the intercom telling her that Mwu was injured. Her knees grew weak as her imagination ran wild with thinking about what could have happened to her beloved. Then the rational side of her brain argued that Mwu was an experienced soldier, and he could take care of himself.

The door to the infirmary slid open as she got there. The doctor was just exiting.

"Is he asleep?" she asked him tentatively.

The doctor shook his head. "No, you can visit for a bit, but he'll need to rest soon."

She nodded and entered the room, sighing with relief when she saw that he was still conscious and smiling as he saw her enter.

"Hey, look who's here to see me!" he grinned at her as he tried to push himself up to a sitting position. Even though he tried to hide it, she still saw him wince in pain. She quickly ran to his side and gently pushed him back down.

"Stop it, Mwu."

It was up close that she'd saw the extent of his injury. Judging by the amount of bandages on his abdomen and right shoulder, and the forced-looking smile on his face, she concluded that even though it wasn't life threatening, it was still pretty serious.

She must have looked pretty worried and scared, for he patted her hand with his left hand to reassured her. "It's just a scratch," he said nonchalantly.

Instead of making her feel better, he saw with dismay as tears began to gather in her eyes.

"Why are you crying? I thought I was the one who's supposed to be in pain." He chuckled slightly as he tried to tease her, but it came out half-hearted. His laugh had sounded strained and tired, lacking in its usual cheer as he tried to hide another wince, and there was no mirth in his usual grin.

"When I heard from Kira-kun that you were injured, I, I was scared." She looked away, slightly embarrassed, but she couldn't help herself. She knew they were in a war, and both Mwu and herself could be easily injured. But it had always been an unsaid fear in the back of her mind that she could lose him, just as she had lost her past lover.

"You told me you would be careful!" she turned back to him with an accusing tone, furiously trying to hold back her tears. "And why do you have to hide your pain like that!"

"I'm sorry," he answered softly. She looked away again, feeling guilty as she caught his weary tone.

A moment of silence passed between them. It was finally broken by her soft, mumbled voice.

"I-I'm sorry too. I just…"

"It's okay Murrue. Please don't worry about me too much. It's not as bad as it looks."

Another moment of silence.

"So, how's the kid doing?" Mwu asked suddenly.

"I don't know," she answered. "I'll go ask," she added when she saw the worried look on his face. She went over to the phone and dialed the number for the Eternal.

Mwu closed his eyes and sighed, trying to ignore the numbing pain in his wounds. The actual wounds weren't too serious, but he was quite tired after running so much and using up too much energy. He also lost quite a bit of blood as well. But he tried to hide his pain, because he didn't want to scare her or to make her worry about him.

Murrue returned from the call and pulled up a stool next to his bed.

"They said that Kira-kun is fine," she answered the questioning look in Mwu's eyes, "He didn't seem to have any physical injuries, he just fainted, probably because he was tired."

Mwu nodded in acknowledgment. "That's good to know. Poor kid…"

Picking up a leather-bound photo album beside her, she asked softly as she flipped through the pages absent-mindedly, "So, what exactly happened in there?"

So Mwu told her about their encounter with Rau Le Creuset in Colony Mendel, how they entered the lab and discovered the works of Dr. Hibiki.

"Even though Kira's not injured physically, he must be in a lot of psychological pain," Mwu said softly. "I'll never forget that look of shock and dismay on Kira's face when Rau told him about his birth. I wonder if what that man said is all true, that bastard!"

Murrue could see the anger in Mwu's blue eyes. She gently stroked his hair to calm him.

"He said that Kira was Humanity's dream, the Ultimate Coordinator," Mwu continued, calmer this time, "He said that Kira was something that shouldn't be allowed to exist," he finished softly, "And that many of his siblings have been sacrificed for his birth."

Murrue looked down, not sure how to reply. Instead, she flipped through the pages of the album idly, pausing at a photo of a man carrying what looked like a young Mwu on his shoulders.

"This is…" she whispered questioningly.

"My father, he was a rich and an arrogant man who always belittled other people," he said simply, turning his head away from her. "He died when I was young, and that was all I could remember of him."

"But this," his fist clenched, "This is…" he paused and struggled to find the right words. "This is unbelievable! How could this have happened! That man, Le Creuset, is my father's clone, and a failed one at that. His telomeres are shortened, which means that his life will be shortened as well."

"It's not your fault Mwu," she whispered softly as she caressed his brow.

"I almost feel sorry for him, being the result of a rich man's fantasies, and being cast aside after being discovered to be a failure. That man has no past and no future. He cannot have any dreams or a life. But he wants to bring the world to an end with him. I can't just sit here and let him do that! I have to stop him."

"Please, don't be so hard on yourself," she whispered softly, "We all want to stop this war, you're not alone. So please don't try to shoulder everything yourself."

He laughed weakly. "No, you're right, it's you who has the tendency to do that." Then he turned towards her with a grateful smile. "Thank you."

He tried to reach her face with his uninjured left hand, but since she was sitting on his right, he couldn't quite reach. She had to stifle a giggle at the soft childish whine coming from him and the slight look of disappointment and frustration on his face.

"Oh Mwu," she giggled as she leaned down, "I'll make it easier for you then."

Reaching out, he gently caressed her cheek, and smiled as she closed her eyes and leaned into his hand.

"Thank you, Murrue." He pulled her face closer, eyes closing as their lips met in a tender kiss.

* * *

_AN: aww, isn't that cute... I know he came out onto the bridge before she came to see him, but I kinda forgot that part as I wrote this, so let's pretend that scene didn't happen... I actually wrote this a while ago, but was having issues editing and finishing it (I have a couple of ideas like that, floating around, waiting to be finished...). but I love their little talk in the infirmary, and it did seem that Mwu kinda felt sorry for Rau, because I think he knows what it feels like to be cast aside. anyway, what she tells him at the end kinda echoes what I had him tell her in "Assurance"._


	24. Answers

_AN: I've written a lot from Murrue's perspective, and I've been wanting to write from Mwu's perspective for a change, and why/how he had come to love her._

* * *

**Title/theme: **ANSWERS  
**Genre: **romance/introspective  
**Approx time line: **Phase 46-47 of GS  
**Summary: "**_He started to question his purpose and place in the world, and she had given him the answers."_

---------

Mwu gazed lovingly at the woman lying in his arms. She looked so peaceful in her slumber. Her smooth, pale face and thick, dark hair reminded him of a porcelain doll, so beautiful and delicate. A complete contrast to her commanding air during battle.

He admired her. He admired her leadership skills, her kindness and compassion towards her comrades, and the silent strength that seemed to emanate from her presence.

He admired her as a leader. There was no question in his mind that she was a competent captain. Even if she might not always think so, the fact that they've made it this far despite the hardships they've had, was all the proof that he needed.

What he admired about her the most was the fact that she was willing to accept and admit it when she was wrong, and listened and took advice from others. Even though she seemed troubled by the hard time Natarle had given her, she never really blamed her for acting that way. "_She's just doing her job," _she told him when he asked her about it. But when she wanted to, she was willing to put her foot down, and he could see Natarle respected her for that.

"_Are you crazy? I can't let you go out in this condition!" _

He'd never met anyone like her before, especially someone in the military. Sure, his superiors in the past had cared about his life, but he couldn't help but somehow feel that they cared because he was an ace pilot, another tool to the military. She was different, like a breath of fresh air. She was kind to him and was concerned about his life. Not just the life of "Commander La Flaga" or the "Mobieus Zero pilot", but also the life of "Mwu".

"_I'd go search for them myself if I could, but right now, we can't. If you were to go and not come back, I…Please stay and trust in Orb for now." _

She was the first person to shed tears for him in a world where he viewed that most people only cared about themselves. She was sincerely considerate of her comrades and her crew, not just because they were soldiers, but she saw them as humans and cared about their lives. Mwu remembered seeing her so agonized and angry at herself after losing Tolle and Kira; and remembered how at Alaska, she took the full responsibility of the decision on her own shoulders so that no one else would be held responsible. Some would say that she was too soft to be in the military, commanding a battleship and fighting a war. So maybe she wasn't the conventional captain, but she was capable and did her best, and took care of her crew and felt responsible for their lives—he remembered how she thanked each and every member earnestly for their help when they were in Orb—and in the end, her kindness came back to her. She persisted in wanting to find Cagalli, despite protests from the combat commander, and in turn, the young girl had helped them out. Mwu couldn't help but think that maybe her compassion was one of the reasons they've made it this far, because they appreciated her kindness, and when they were given a choice, only eleven disembarked, the rest of the crew chose to stay with her.

Growing up in the military, Mwu was trained to fight; his mind had been conditioned to not question the motives for fighting, but to fight to protect oneself first and foremost. Because of this, he never really had friends, only comrades. Sure, he agonized over the deaths of his comrades—even though he may not show it—but he always managed to bury those thoughts in the back of his mind like he was trained to do, knowing that if he faltered, he could be next. Instead of thinking about the losses, he chose to let those feelings of darkness turn into anger, and use it against the enemy.

_Who is the enemy anyway? _He found himself asking more and more lately.

He had always avoided thinking about these things, because it was easier for him to think about the enemy as some force needing to be conquered instead of human beings just like himself. It was easier on his conscience to think that if he didn't shoot, they would. That way, when he fought, he wouldn't hesitate.

He didn't want to fight, nobody did. But he felt obligated to do so because he felt he should be putting his abilities to good use. He was taught to fight because he was told to, because they needed to protect themselves. That was then, what about now? What was he fighting for now that there was no one to give him orders? For whom and what was he obligated to put his abilities to good use?

At times, he felt alone as he sat in the tiny cockpit, flying around in the vastness of space. He was trained to not think about those things when fighting, but once the fighting was over, sometimes those thoughts of loneliness would seep into his mind, thinking how small and insignificant he seemed to the world. Would anyone care or notice if he ceased to exist?

Even when surrounded by people, he felt a certain loneliness. He felt detached from the world, wary of its inhabitants and the looks they gave him, as if judging him, whispering to each other about what he couldn't do. He often felt the ghosts of his past coming back to haunt him, jeering at him for being inadequate, and that he'd never become something great.

"_Take care of him and educate him well. Don't let him turn out like that **idiot**, that woman's child!" _

Ever since he was little, the people around him looked down on him, because he was "that woman's child". They always compared him with the other boy, commenting on how much better the other boy was. They often commented about how even though Mwu was the older son, he was "unfit" to inherit his father's fortune. His father rejected him, and his mother became ashamed of him. Mwu's initial dejection turned to anger.

"_I'll show you, someday, I'll become someone great, just you wait!" _

They say man's greatest enemy is himself, and Mwu was no exception. Another reason that he chose to enlist and to fight was because he wanted—needed—to prove to _them_ (and himself really) that he was not useless like he was made to believe, that he could make something out of himself, and that being "that woman's child" didn't mean that he was an idiot. He worked hard to hone his skills as a pilot, and when he earned the title of "Hawk of Endymion", he silently yelled an "I-told-you-so" to his long-dead father.

"_You have nothing to prove, Mwu. I like you the way you are." _

It wasn't until she said those words to him, that he realised how stupid and pointless all that was compared to the larger scheme of things. He had pulled her into his arms and embraced her tightly when she uttered those words, straining to hold back tears. She probably had no idea of the gravity of her words, and what they meant to him. But she was the first one to tell him that he didn't have to pretend, that he should be living his own life the way he wanted. She was the first one to accept him for who he was as a person, regardless of what he was or what he did, or didn't, achieve. And he felt relieved at her words, because it meant that she understood him, and he no long needed to feel wary or judged around her.

But what was it that made someone who they were? Was it their genetic code? And if so, are their personality and character pre-programmed? Who exactly was Mwu La Flaga?

"_My father was an arrogant and selfish man. He died when I was little, and that was all I remember of him." _

Before the Mendel incident, Mwu had no idea just _how_ selfish and arrogant his father had been. And when he did find out—from the product of Al Da Flaga's arrogance of all sources—it stirred a new fear within him. They say that the child resembled the parent. And as much as they both despise it, the fact was that Mwu was his father's son. Did that mean that he would turn out like his father? Whenever thoughts like these crept into his mind, Mwu would shove them away like he usually did, but they seemed to constantly seep back into his consciousness. He liked to think that no, he was _nothing_ like his father, and would never be like him, but there was always that fear. There was an even greater fear, one that came from "What if she found out?" Would she reject him and scorn him like the others?

"_It's not your fault, Mwu. You are _you. _Even if you carry some of his genes, you're still your own person, with your own life." _

Once again, he felt moved by her words. He was touched that she came to his side as soon as she could, calming his anger and chasing away his doubts with her smile. He felt comforted as she stroked his hair, lulling him to sleep. He was beginning to see what he would be fighting for.

Presently, she stirred in his arms, drawing him away from his thoughts for the moment. She let out a soft sigh, her soft breath tickling his neck.

"Mwu…" she murmured contently as she snuggled closer, her smile growing as if experiencing a wonderful dream.

He smiled at her sleeping form, thinking how wonderful his name sounded on her lips. Not many people referred to him by his first name. In fact, only three people did at the present—one of whom he didn't particularly like. He wasn't close enough to many people really to have them call him "Mwu" so casually. Growing up scorned by those who took care of him, and then in the strict environment of the military, he didn't trust people easily. Although he put on a friendly façade and seemed to get along with everyone well enough, he avoided getting truly close to people, especially since they were fighting in a war, not knowing who was next to go. It was easier that way; it'd save him a lot of emotional distress.

He wasn't the only one like that. A lot of comrades that he'd met felt the same way, creating a polite, but not really friendly environment. That was why she surprised him so much, the fact that she trusted so easily and readily. She trusted a Coordinator boy whom she hardly knew with a top military machine—given they had no other choice—when any other officer would have been skeptical, him and Natarle included. When they were in Orb, she trusted the nation and accepted their help, despite protests from Natarle. She trusted a bunch of student volunteers to help with the operation of the ship. And they, in turn, trusted their lives in her decisions. With him, she trusted and respected his abilities, and he learned to trust her decisions and instincts. Watching her, Mwu learned that it was okay to get close to people; it was okay to trust, because she'd shown him that the kindness would one day come back.

She stayed professional and strong on the battlefield, and despite her misgivings sometimes, hid her complaints until after the crisis had passed. And for that, he greatly admired her, which was probably why he'd always instinctively come to her defence against Natarle. He was surprised at how much she tolerated his laid-back attitude and gentle teasing, and that she was willing to relax around him, especially seeing how she seemed so tense around Natarle. That only encouraged him, because he wanted to hear her laugh, to see her smile. She was the first to show him love, and for the first time in his life, he wanted to love in return. Her compassion had stirred something within him, a desire for him to return the kindness. And it was that desire that inspired his actions at Alaska. He was worried about her life as he fled through JOSH-A to return to her side.

It never occurred to him that he was holding the captain of the Archangel in his arms. To him, she was just "Murrue". He had learned, as she showed him, to trust and love her for who she was.

He brushed back her dark hair, gently caressing her soft, warm skin. He smiled as she leaned into his touch, murmuring happily.

She had taught him and inspired him so much, even if she didn't realize it herself. She'd shown him the lighter side of human nature, the side that held compassion, acceptance, trust, and love.

Mwu wasn't afraid of death, and he never really cared to think too far into the future, choosing to live one day at a time. There was no point in thinking ahead too much, because it would just be another distraction, a fantasy that he dared not to think about. No, growing up in the military, he'd learned to accept the fact that each fight could be his last. However, he, like the rest of humanity, still struggled to live, wanting to continue their existence for as long as they could. But what was he living _for_? Why was he fighting so hard? He never really questioned that either. However, after what he'd seen and experienced, he started to question his purpose and place in the world, and she had given him the answers. He would fight and live for tomorrow, a better and brighter future. She had given him a desirable future, and a place in the world, a place where he belonged and could return to, a place where he would always be accepted and loved no matter what.

He gazed upon her peaceful face before gently kissing her brow.

_Thank you for everything… _

He smiled softly. It was nice not to be alone. She was there for him, her warmth reminding remind him that he was not alone, that his life would not be lived in vain, and she'd given him a future to look forward to.

And in the end, that was all he really wanted. They would support each other, and together, they would find peace and true happiness.

* * *

_AN: hehe, I think I went a bit philosophical there :D. A lot of ideas/themes came out of a discussion I had with AbbyKat on the Imdb boards. We started to discuss Mwu's character and his relationship with Murrue, sharing our opinions. A lot of people think that Mwu loves her because he wants to protect her or because she's vulnerable, but I don't think that's all there is to it. I think he loves her mostly because she was different and that he admired her. and going back, I feel that Mwu might be somewhat emotionally distant, considering how he grew up, while Murrue's emotionally stronger and more accepting._

_The title/theme comes from AbbyKat, "Kira may be the main reason Mwu starts questioning his role in the war and his reasons for fighting, but Murrue is the one who gives him the answers to those questions."_


	25. Gift

**Title/theme: **GIFT  
**Summary: **_She kissed him gently and smiled, face content. "It's okay. The fact that you came was the best gift I could've ever asked for."_

-----

October 12.

It was a joyous occasion, with the war ended, and everyone gathered at the little seaside house to celebrate the birthday of one special person.

"Happy birthday Murrue-san!" the young Coordinator boy shouted as he raised his glass to the former warship captain.

Murrue smiled and blushed in embarrassment. "Oh come on, Kira-kun, aren't I getting too old for this?"

"Oh come now Captain Ramius," Andrew Waltfeld gave her a nudge and a wink, "You're never too old to party!"

She shook her head and let them have their way. It was after all, just another excuse for friends to get together and celebrate the peace that they've been having for the past year. She was glad to see the smiles on everyone's faces, especially Kira's, that she allowed herself to be talked into having a party like this.

But despite her smiles, she seemed a little sad, as she looked around for the one person that she wanted to, but wasn't, seeing.

"Are you sure you don't need any help?" Lacus asked as she stood in the doorway with Kira. The party was over, and guests were leaving one by one.

"Yes, thank you for the offer Lacus-san, but I can clean up by myself."

She closed the door behind the last of her guests and sighed. As she turned to go back to the kitchen, she almost jumped at the blond figure standing before her, a familiar grin on his handsome face.

"Hey there!" he said, smile growing.

"Don't do that! You scared me," she grumbled as she made her way back to the kitchen.

"I'm sorry," he laughed as he followed her.

"You should be," she scolded. "And you're late too!" she complained as she took two plates and headed for the sink, pretending to be angry.

"Aww, I'm sorry," he tried to peer at her face. When she wouldn't let him see, he sighed and resorted to wrapping his arms tightly around her, nearly making her drop the plates out of surprise.

"Mwu!" she protested, but the protest turned to laughter as he nuzzled her neck, tickling her with his gentle breath. She could never stay angry at him.

"You're late," she whispered, a bit sadly, "I thought you'd forgotten."

"Me? Forget!" he protested with feigned offence, "I'd _never_ forget your special day Murrue."

She smiled. She didn't think he'd forget. "But you missed the party."

"Hmm, I know," he answered, kissing her cheek. "I came late on purpose, 'cause I want to have you all to myself."

She giggled and poked him on the nose. "You're so selfish, you know that?"

"I know," he whispered in her ear, his breath a soft breeze, before releasing her and stealing some leftover cake.

"Stop that!" she grabbed the cake from him and put it in the fridge, despite his childish whine. "You didn't make it on time for the party, so you can't have any cake."

"Aww, no cake…" he looked at her in disappointment, and she couldn't help but giggle slightly at his childishness.

"Oh yeah," he came up to her, as if remembering something important. "I haven't told you yet, have I?"

"What?" she looked up and found herself staring into his blue eyes shining with laughter.

"Happy birthday Murrue."

She closed her eyes as he kissed her on the lips, the brush of his lips reminding her of a playful summer breeze.

"Thank you." She smiled, a genuine smile that reflected her happiness.

"So, shall we take a walk outside?" Before she could protest, he grabbed her hand and led her outside onto the beach and stepping into the shallow water. She watched as the sun reflected off his golden hair and smiled. He was just how she remembered.

"So, how have things been for you?" he asked as they watched the waves gently lap at her sandaled feet.

She looked into the horizon. "I'm managing," she answered softly.

He looked wistful. "I'm sorry," he whispered as he took her in his arms.

"It's alright Mwu, I'm fine." She leaned her head on his shoulder, "I just wish we could stay like this, forever."

He didn't say anything, but Murrue thought she felt him nod.

"Maybe we should go back," he whispered as he felt her shiver slightly due to the wind starting to pick up.

She shook her head. "Please, let's stay like this, just for a while longer."

There they stayed, watching the sun dye the sky and the ocean with its colours as it slowly sank towards the horizon.

"I-I have to go, soon," he whispered, eyes on the setting sun.

She gasped softly as she looked at him in dismay, but nodded in understanding as she turned her gaze back to the horizon. "I know."

"Oh yeah, I, um," he looked down, slightly embarrassed, "I forgot to get you a present."

She kissed him gently and smiled, face content. "It's okay. The fact that you came was the best gift I could've ever asked for."

The wind picked up, tossing her dark hair. The sun was just a glimmer of light above the ocean now, and they both knew what it meant.

"I have to go now Murrue," he told her as he caressed her face, his touch like that of the wind. She nodded, but pulled him closer, as if wanting to keep his fleeting presence there with her.

"I'm sorry, but I can't stay, you know that," he looked sad as he gently brushed away the tear trailing down her cheek.

She smiled sadly and nodded again. "I know. But promise you'll come again."

"I promise. I'll visit you in your dreams."

With a final kiss that was soft and gentle like the spring wind, he melted away into the ocean breeze.

_Happy birthday!_ she heard it whisper and smiled.

_Thank you Mwu, for giving me the best gift ever… _

* * *

_AN: that wasn't what you expected, was it? another piece inspired by the OVA scene (I really do like that scene...), kinda companion piece to "Birthday"._


	26. Trust

**Title/theme: **TRUST  
**Genre: **general  
**Approx time line: **Phase 24-5 of GS  
**Summary: **_She saw that he seemed to breath a sigh of relief. "So then, you have faith in my abilities?" _

--

"I can't believe she actually said that," Murrue heard someone say as she walked past the cafeteria.

"Yeah, the Captain sure has guts, standing up to the Lieutenant like that. I sure wouldn't have," someone relied.

Murrue sighed and shook her head. Let them talk about what they wanted, she didn't care. She was too tired to care.

"They're right, you know," came a familiar voice from behind her. She sighed and simply kept going.

"I heard about what you said to the Lieutenant, and I have to say, I'm quite impressed," the voice persisted when she didn't answer.

"I suppose I should feel flattered?" she mumbled without turning around.

He chuckled, "Well, I _am_ trying to compliment you."

She rolled her eyes, he didn't see of course, "In that case, thank you."

They walked in silence. She still didn't turn around, but she knew he was there, following her.

"You know, you shouldn't let her harass you like that," he said softly, breaking the silence.

She sighed, "She's just doing her job Commander."

"Oh?" Mwu raised an eyebrow, "Since when is it the job of the Vice-Captain to harass the Captain?"

Silence.

"No, that's _your_ job, isn't it Commander," she finally replied.

Mwu blinked in surprise. It took him a moment to realise she was just joking. She couldn't keep the slight twitch of her lips as he laughed nervously.

"Oh come on, why are you being so mean to me?" he protested with feigned offence.

She laughed on the inside, "Because you were asking for it."

They stopped outside her office as she punched the code to open the door.

"Can I come in for a bit?" he asked as she entered. She glanced at him with a raised eyebrow. Even though he was asking for permission, he was already halfway into her room.

"Sure, I guess," she waved her hand and sat at her chair. He followed and sat down on the edge of her desk.

"You look tired," he observed as she massaged her temples.

"You try being the Captain," she retorted as she leaned on her arms.

He chuckled. "I'd love to give it a try," he leaned closer and stared into her eyes, "As soon as I find someone to replace me in the Skygrasper." There was a look of challenge in his blue eyes.

She humphed and looked away. "You know I can't pilot that thing." Then she grinned, "And I doubt you know how to command this ship."

He opened his mouth to retort, but she cut him off.

"Let's stick to our jobs Commander, especially now."

He smiled softly. "Aye aye Captain!" before patting her shoulder, "Just don't work yourself too hard."

"I'll remember that. Thank you Commander."

She looked back to him, "Did you want something specifically?"

He looked surprised for a moment, but caught himself. He smiled gently; there was something in his blue eyes, something that Murrue couldn't quite place.

"I just wanted to thank you."

"Thank me?" she was taken aback, "For what?"

He shook his head, "I'll tell you someday, but not right now."

She knitted her brow, "Commander, if you have something to say, say it now, because 'someday' may not…" her voice trailed off.

But he still shook his head. "Now's not the right time. You'll know one day," he told her firmly.

Silence passed between them. It was broken by the gentle clearing of her throat.

"Commander?"

"Yes?"

"Could you please not sit on my desk?"

Mwu was speechless for once. He quickly stood up and walked to the other side of the room.

"Actually, there's something else I wanted to ask you," he started.

"Yes?"

"Why did you want to search for that girl so badly?" he turned to her, "I mean, from a strategic point of view, it's not the smartest thing to do."

"I know," she answered softly, not looking at him, "Natarle made sure to let me know that quite clearly."

"No, I didn't mean it like that!" he said quickly, "It's just that, well, it's not something that is done. I mean, sending out the Strike to search for one person when we're in ZAFT territory, when we didn't even know if we'd find her or not." Then at her troubled look, his tone softened, "Look, I'm not trying to chastise you or question you, I'm just curious."

"I just want to take care of my crew," she answered softly, "Everyone's been so kind to me, even though I know I'm not the best of captains."

"I know your intensions are good Captain," he said softly, "But you could've endangered everyone else by sending out the Strike like that. We could've been attacked, and without Kira—"

"I _know_ that!" she cut him off, surprising him with her tone. It softened as she realised she was almost yelling. "I know that. But Cagalli-san helped us in the desert. She's just a girl, not even in the military, yet she's lending us her strength by helping us fight. It's the least that I could do in return. Besides," she mumbled, as if not wanting him to hear, "I wasn't worried. Even if Kira-kun was out, you were still here if they'd attacked."

"You really are too soft," he whispered.

"So I've heard," she sighed.

He smiled, "But, that's probably just what we need for this ship."

"Eh?" she looked up in surprise.

"One more question before I leave you alone," he walked to her desk and leaned closer, "If it'd been me in that girl's place, would you do the same for me?"

She looked at him square in the eye. "No."

Mwu straightened up in surprise. Once again, he was speechless. That was not the answer he was expecting.

"W-Why not?"

She couldn't hide the smile at his surprise and disappointment. "Because you're so mean to me." She giggled at his confused look, as if not sure how to react. She took a deep breath to calm herself down.

"But seriously Commander," she smiled, "I wouldn't do that for you because I _know_ you'd never get yourself into that kind of situation in the first place. I trust you to take care of yourself."

She saw that he seemed to breath a sigh of relief. "So then, you have faith in my abilities?"

She shrugged and smiled, "I've got no other choice, now do I?"

He grinned from ear to ear. "Then I'll trust in your decisions as well," he told her softly and patted her shoulder.

"Get some rest Captain," he said as he headed for the door, "Don't worry, I'll hold down the fort for ya. You can trust me with the ship!"

"Hey wait! I said I trust in your abilities as a pilot, not—"

But he was already out the door.

She sighed as she headed for her bed. Yes, it was true that she trusted him during a battle, which was why she couldn't help but feel so safe with him out there, but what she didn't tell him was that if it ever came down to it that he needed help, she'd be the first to assist him, even if she had to go against everyone to do it.

_What can I say? I really am too soft of a captain…_

* * *

_AN: I dunno, randomness... just noticed that most of these are set either late or after SEED, just wanted to write something earlier, and with Murrue teasing Mwu for once... and that they may not always agree on everything. I think Mwu's more of a soldier than Murrue, so he may not understand everything she does... but I really do think they trust in each other's abilities..._


	27. Forgiven

**Title/theme: **FORGIVEN  
**Approx time line: **Phase 46-47 of GS**  
Summary: "**_His eyes widened at her remark. Before she could react, he pulled her into his embrace, holding her tightly." _

-----

"So this is where you've been hiding," a voice came from behind as she entered the little space at the back of the ship.

"Hmm?" the man standing before the window turned and smiled at the newcomer. "I'm not exactly hiding Captain."

The captain giggled, "Then what are you doing?"

"Thinking," he answered, turning back to staring out the window at the endless vacuum of space.

"About what?" she asked as she floated up to join him at the window.

A pause.

"Murrue," he turned to her, and she was surprised by the intenseness in his blue eyes.

"Y-Yes?"

"Why did you join the military?"

"E-Eh?" she was taken aback by the sudden question. But before she could formulate an answer, he went on, as if talking to himself.

"Ever since I was little, people kept on telling me how I'm useless, how I can never become anything great," he told her softly, "Because I was 'that woman's child'". He was not looking at her, but she could tell by the troubled look in his eyes that this was not something easy for him to talk about. So she reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"I was told that I was unfit to inherit my father's fortunes, and if my father had his way, I wouldn't even be living in his house." Mwu placed a hand on the cool glass and swallowed, but went on, "At first, I was dejected, but then I felt angry, who were they to tell me what I can and cannot do? So when I heard some people comment that I had some special abilities that could be useful to the military, I joined right away. I joined because I felt that I needed to put my abilities to good use, or that's what I told everyone what my reason was." He looked down and lowered his voice, "But the real reason I joined was because I wanted, no, I needed, to prove to everyone that I could make something out of myself, but mostly, I needed to prove to _myself_ that I'm not useless."

He turned his gaze to her, and again, she was taken aback by the intenseness in them. "Isn't that a selfish reason to fight?" he said softly, chuckling almost nervously.

She placed a hand on his and turned her gaze to the window. "Everyone has different reasons to fight, and no one reason is better than another. And we all have our selfish reasons." She looked down and added softly, "But you know Mwu, you have nothing to prove, I like you the way you are."

His eyes widened at her remark. Before she could react, he pulled her into his embrace, holding her tightly.

"Mwu!" she exclaimed softly in surprise. She was about to ask what he was doing, but stayed quiet when she felt him shaking slightly. Instead, she hugged him in return, gently patting his back.

They stayed like that for a while, before he finally released her and turned towards the window again.

"Mwu, are you crying?" she noted softly, startled at the realisation.

He didn't answer, just stared out into space, his face half hidden in the shadows. She was about to lean closer to see if he was all right, when he turned to face her.

No, he wasn't crying, she realised. His eyes were dry, but the look on his face reminded her of that of a lost little boy, as if he was trying to hold something back.

"You know Mwu," she told him softly, "Despite what they say, it's okay to show your weaknesses, no one will think less of you if you do."

She floated up to him and gently caressed his cheek, smiling softly. He was grateful for the kindness and understand in her eyes.

"Murrue, I…" he embraced her again, and buried his head on her shoulder. She held him and patted his shaking shoulders.

"It's okay Mwu…"

And when he looked at her again, the look on his face was that of relief, like he was forgiven.

* * *

_AN: a scene expanded from what she told him in Ch 24: Answers. Many people (including me) wrote about circumstances where he told her it's okay to cry, and I just wanted to do the reverse. I know we never do see Mwu show his weaknesses or cry (unlike the younger boys), but I don't think he could be like that all the time... and no, we don't quite see his tears here either :)_


	28. Pest

**Title/theme: **PEST  
**Genre: **fluff  
**Approx time line: **Phase 26-28 of GS  
**Summary: **_She did her best to ignore him, but he was quite persistent_

--

He watched from the doorframe as her fingers tapped on the keyboard. He guessed that she was working on some damage report or another. The look of concentration on her tired face looked almost comical, but he dared not to laugh. He could sense that all the work that she had been thrown at due to repairs of the ship had made her short-tempered and tired.

"You're in my room again Commander," she stated without looking up as she continued tapping. He could hear a slight tone of impatience under her politeness.

"Not yet I'm not," he grinned. Then stepped uncertainly into the room. He was pretty sure that it wasn't the safest thing to do, but then again, Mwu La Flaga didn't always play it safe. "But now I am."

He detected a low growl of annoyance in her throat. "What do you want?"

The room was silent except for the light clicking sound of her tapping away at the keyboard. When he didn't answer, she looked up, and almost jumped when she discovered that he was leaning over her desk as if trying to see what she was writing.

She stopped and gave him a hard glare. "What do you want?" she asked again, enunciating every word clearly.

He just grinned, unfazed. "Just wondering how you were doing."

"Couldn't you bother me at some other time? I'm busy right now," she gave an exasperated sigh before turning her attention back to the screen.

"Well, maybe it's time for you to take a break," he replied smoothly. "Wanna go exploring with me?"

She paused mid-tap as she stared at him incredulously. "What?"

He grinned, happy that he got her attention. "You know, go outside for a bit, walk around the streets of Orb. I need some fresh air after being stuck here so long," he leaned closer, and pretended to study her features, "And apparently, so do you."

Murrue was speechless for a moment before regaining her composure. She went back to typing and answered nonchalantly, "Sorry, unlike you, I've got work to finish."

"Oh come on, you can finish that later," he tried to grab her hand to pull her along, but she pulled her hand away.

"If you want fresh air that badly Commander, find someone else to go with you," she said without looking up.

"But I want to go with _you_!"

She raised an eyebrow. "Sorry, like I said, I'm busy."

"Please?" he begged, pretending to look hurt.

She groaned in annoyance and decided to ignore him and concentrate on her work. However, it was rather difficult, as he seemed to try his hardest to pester and distract her. When she ignored his words, he walked around the desk and looked over her shoulder, pointing at various things on the screen and either asking what they meant, or wondering aloud what they were for. In between his ramblings and (annoying) questions, he'd whisper "Please?" in her ear. She did her best to ignore him, but he was quite persistent, until finally, she saved her work and closed her laptop with a huff.

"Will you stop that!" she exclaimed and stood up. "You're such a child!"

He gulped as he feared that he'd pushed her too far. He quickly stepped away from her, nervous grin plastered on his face.

"Sorry," he mumbled. "I just thought you needed a rest…"

She heaved a deep sigh and turned to him with a defeated look.

"I'm never going to get this done at this rate," she muttered. "And you're never going to leave alone until I say yes, aren't you?"

The nervous grin turned into a triumphant one as he nodded.

She scowled. "Just this once Commander, don't push your luck."

"I won't," he chuckled as he followed her out the room. But he couldn't help but ask, "But I'm good, aren't I?"

She could feel a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth, but quickly hid it.

"Unfortunately, yes. You really _are_ a pest!"

* * *

_AN: think we could use some fluff (and good ol' Mwu's antics) after all that angst... I was actually gonna write the outing, but turned into this :) guess I'll have to write that some other time..._


	29. Peace

_AN: continuation of last chapter_

* * *

**Title/theme: **PEACE  
**Genre: **fluff  
**Approx time line: **Phase 26-28 of GS  
**Summary: **"_Come on," he grinned, "You and I both need to go outside. We've been stuck indoors for so long that I wonder if we've become creatures of the night" _

_--_

"This is a bad idea," the Archangel captain mumbled as she walked towards the exit of the ship. "What if someone needs me?"

The man walking beside her sighed. "Relax Captain, like they said, the ship's safe here. It can't even be detected by satellite, so they can't find us."

"But, what if the crew—"

"Let the Lieutenant deal with it," he cut her off. "I'm sure whatever problem they have, they can wait until you get back."

"But—"

"Whatever work you have to finish, it can wait. For now, just relax and stop worrying," he stated with finality. Then at her unsure look, his tone softened. "They'll be fine for a few hours. Have a little faith in the crew."

She sighed and nodded. She'd already agreed to go take a walk with him, and she doubt he'd let her go back on her word. Guess they'd just have to do without their captain for a few hours.

"Come on," he grinned, "You and I both need to go outside. We've been stuck indoors for so long that I wonder if we've become creatures of the night. I bet you probably don't even remember what the sun looks like."

She giggled, "Why would you look at the sun directly?"

But he was right. They've been either inside the ship, the hanger, or the Morgenraete facilities since they've arrived at Orb. And before that, they've been inside the ship since leaving the desert.

As they reached the exit, Mwu suddenly stopped her.

"Wait, you can't go out dressed like that," he said.

Murrue looked down at herself. He was right. She couldn't exactly walk around Orb in her EA military uniform. It was supposed to be a secret that Orb was helping their ship. She looked up and noticed that he was wearing a plain t-shirt and jeans (where did he get that anyway?). She sighed inwardly. So he planned this all along.

"Well, what am I going to wear then?"

He looked thoughtful, but shrugged. "I dunno, but not that."

Before she could react, he leaned forward and started to unbutton her uniform collar for her, then moved as if to help her unzip her jacket. Her cheeks flushed as she stopped his hand with hers.

"I-I can do it myself Commander," she managed to stutter. She was wearing a t-shirt underneath, but still…

She heard him sigh in defeat. "Of course Captain," then in a tone that barely hid his amusement, "But could you let go of my hand first?" he chuckled.

She looked at him blankly as his words sank in, as if not knowing what he was talking about. Then she realised that she was still holding on to his hand. She gasped and quickly released her grip, face flaming. She dared not to look at him as her heart pounded in embarrassment.

"W-Wait here, I-I'll go change into, into a Morgenraete uniform or something," she stuttered before quickly running off, faintly hearing his muffled laughter.

She came back a moment later in the red coat and green pants of Morgenraete. She thought she saw slight disappointment cross his features, but shook it away, telling herself it was just her imagination.

They walked away from the ship and out onto the streets. It was mid-afternoon, and the sun was shining gloriously in a blue sky that matched his eyes.

"Ah," he took in a deep breath, "Sky, trees, fresh air! How I've missed you!" He tilted his head towards the sky, then pretended to cover his eyes in pain. "The sun, it burns!"

She laughed. Sometimes she could hardly believe that he was actually older than her.

"This way," he gestured as he led her to a waiting car. She raised an eyebrow. So he really did plan this.

"I thought you said you wanted to take a walk."

He grinned. "Yes, but we have to get away from the military facilities first."

As they drove along, Murrue tilted her head back to enjoy the breeze. She could feel that her head was clearing already with the fresh air and sunlight. She wondered faintly where he was taking her as she looked at the peaceful neighbourhoods they've passed. Looking at this, you really had no idea that a war was going on just outside the border.

They parked the car on a peaceful side street and decided to walk to the dock. The street they took was lined with shops and stalls, and people roamed casually in and out without a care in the world. They passed a park, where children laughed as they played, and couples sat together enjoying each other's company. On the street, people were bustling about in their cars, on foot, or bicycles. Billboards and screens displayed ads and music videos instead of image of battles and propaganda. And for the two soldiers who had been in the military for so long that they'd forgotten what normal life was like, they envied these people.

"It's so peaceful here," Murrue noted as she glanced at the displays in the store windows.

"Yeah," he agreed. "Hard to believe there even _is_ a war out there."

"Heliopolis was like this too," she said wistfully, "before…" she trailed off.

Her eyes widened a bit as she felt him grab her hand and squeezed it gently in assurance. She blushed slightly and smiled in thanks, noticing how warm his hand felt.

"Um, Commander?" she glanced at him shyly. He gave her his usual grin.

"Yes?"

"C-Could you let go of my hand now?"

"Oh, sorry," he chuckled and did as he was asked, but with a bit of reluctance.

They walked on in silence, content to watch the citizens of Orb go about in their everyday life. And since they were out of their uniforms, for the moment, they could pretend that they too, lived in peace. For the moment, they could get away from fighting wars, from developing strategies of their next battle, repairing military equipment, doing paperwork, and pretend that they had no other care in the world except to take a walk through the streets.

"Makes me wonder sometimes why I chose to give this up in the first place," she mused aloud.

"I know," he said softly. "But I feel a bit better thinking that what we're doing right now could one day bring this"—he gestured at the surroundings—"to the rest of the world."

They reached the dock and stood there gazing at the azure waters, breathing in the salty air. In the distance, a gull cried out as it dove into the waves.

"Phew, it's getting hot," she commented as she unbuttoned and shrugged off the jacket, revealing her blue t-shirt underneath. Even though the ocean wind was cool, they no longer had any shade here, and the mid-afternoon sun made her quite hot inside the thick coat.

"That's better," she inhaled as she tilted her head back to enjoy the cooling wind.

Mwu stood beside her, and found his attention being drawn to her rather than to the scenery, and watched her with a gentle smile. He had wondered how she would look without her uniform on. He had wanted to take her out so that she could enjoy herself without the obligation of being captain, but also because he wanted to see her in a different setting, a casual setting, and he wanted to see her be herself and smile genuinely. He was slightly disappointed when she shed her EA uniform only to put on another one, but now that she'd taken her jacket off…

She looked so peaceful. It was hard to imagine that this woman was indeed the captain of the now famous "legged ship" that evaded ZAFT for so long. She looked like an ordinary woman. But he knew that she was far from that. If he looked closely, even without her uniform, he could still feel her silent strength, poise, and commanding air of a warship captain. Her dark hair danced as the ocean breeze threaded its fingers through it. Her marigold eyes shone happily as they gazed into the horizon. Her pink lips were curved up slightly in a gentle and content smile. She looked relaxed but still dignified, and was absolutely breathtaking.

"Murrue…" he breathed in awe as he watched her.

"Hmm?" she turned towards him absent-mindedly. "Did you say something Commander?"

Realising his mistake, he quickly replied, "Uh, nothing Captain, just that it's so peaceful here."

She turned back to the scenery, gentle smile still there.

"And it's so beautiful too."

"Yes," he agreed softly, but he wasn't looking at the scenery.

"Wouldn't it be nice if we could live in someplace like this one day?"

"Yeah," he answered, nodding, "That would be great."

"Until then, let's work hard together to bring that about," she smiled, turning to him with determination in her eyes.

"Yes," he returned her smiled, "Let's work together," he echoed.

Without thinking, he reached for her hand. But this time, neither asked the other to let go.

* * *

_AN: aww look, two fluffy chaps in a row from me, hope it makes up for "What the Heart Desires"?_

_anyway, idea actually came from Destiny, when Neo asked Murrue if she wanted to go outside for some fresh air since she's been stuck on the ship for so long. I wondered if that ever happened in SEED. I wanted them to relax in Orb, but debated whether to set it the first or second time they're in Orb. I set it to the first time because it's when they're beginning to really like each other. and the uniform, well, I just like the idea of Mwu loosening Murrue's collar for her -_


	30. Agreement

**Title/theme: **AGREEMENT  
**Genre: **slight angst  
**Approx time line: **After GS  
**Summary: **_It was a mutual agreement, though one made almost subconsciously _

--

"_Don't let them get you until I return." _

He would always say those words when he went on ahead for a sneak attack. And every time he said them, she would always answer silently, _I won't, I promise._

And every time he returned after mission accomplished to find the ship in tact, just the way he'd left it, he would smile, his eyes saying _I knew you'd be all right_.

It was a mutual agreement, though one made almost subconsciously. She would always fend them off, not once failing to keep to the agreement. And he too, kept his word by returning with a victorious smile every time.

When it was almost over, he had reiterated his terms.

_"I'll be right back, with victory in hand."_

She nodded, believing that if they kept to their routine, everything would be fine. After all, he had always kept his word before, as long as she kept hers.

_Come back, I'll wait for you._

Once again, she kept her terms, waiting patiently for his return.

But he didn't.

Just once, he'd failed to keep his word.

She had kept her end of the agreement until the very end, but he had broken his.

--

**Word count**: 200

* * *

_AN: a double drabble this time, inspired by how Mwu always says those words before going out. I wanted to write something with an exact number of words, and believe me, it was harder than it looks..._

_Wow, 30 chapters! thanks everyone for the support!_


	31. Shattered

**Title/theme: **SHATTERED  
**Genre: **angst  
**Approx time line: **After GS  
**Summary: **_Everything was shattered with the Strike. _

---

Everything was shattered with the Strike.

Her heart, her hopes, her happiness.

Her silly and childish belief that things would be all right, that her love was enough to keep him safe.

Everything.

Shattered to tiny pieces like the debris floating in the void of space. Broken to countless pieces that scattered with her tears.

It hurt, the pain manifesting in the physical sense, but it did serve to numb her mind somewhat.

She remembered seeing images of shattered Junius Seven—the event that started this war that took him away.

But in the end, it was her that shattered.

---

Word count: 100

* * *

_AN: a true drabble this time, exactly 100 words. It's rather hard to write in such a short space, but I rather like how this one turned out._


	32. Impossibility

**Title/theme: **IMPOSSIBILITY  
**Genre: **slight angst  
**Approx time line: **After GS  
**Summary: **"_How exactly do you make the impossible possible?" _

--

"_Am I not the man who can make the impossible, possible?" _

The first time that she heard him say those words was when they floated amidst the debris of Heliopolis, trying to formulate a strategy. She had raised an eyebrow, but didn't say anything. Personally, she found the phrase to be absurd, ridiculous even.

"What does that _mean_ exactly?" she had asked him once, exasperated, when the curiosity became too much for her. "How exactly do you make the impossible possible?"

He just winked at her, grinning. "One day you'll understand," he answered mysteriously.

Indeed, over time, maybe she did come to understand, as she saw him succeed in seemingly impossible missions. Like the time when they were caught between two ZAFT ships on their way to Artemis, when his cunning plans had enabled them to pull through. Though she never really understood _how_ he did it. Perhaps it was his skill, or maybe his almost unnatural amount of luck. However he did it, she didn't really care.

But in the end, he could not overcome every impossibility. There was one that had eluded him, and she knew that even the great Hawk of Endymion could not make that possible.

--

Word count: 200

* * *

_AN: wow, I didn't even try this time and got 200 words exact! though I don't think this is as good as the last couple. _


	33. Vengeance

**Title/theme: **VENGEANCE  
**Genre: **angst/dark  
**Approx time line: **Phase 49 of GS  
**Summary: **_Dark emotions flowed into her heart. Anger. Hatred. Vengeance. _

-----

She could only stare in shock at the void where the Strike had been moments ago. Her eyes searched for any sign of the cockpit that somehow might've survived, but the Gundam was shattered to pieces.

As her numb mind tried to process what had just happened, tears gathered in her eyes and scattered.

The first thing that registered after the passing of the initial shock was excruciating and numbing pain. Her heart felt like it was being ripped from her body. Her head was pounding and dizzy from the overflow of information and emotions. She didn't know the pain of heartbreak could be so physical.

But there was no time to mourn, as the crew informed her that the Dominion was still approaching, waiting for her command.

Through her tears, she saw the Archangel's sister ship heading closer. The pain subsided somewhat, making way for the darkness in her heart. Her hard, unforgiving eyes narrowed as she glowered at the enemy ship gritting her teeth.

Three words formed on her mind.

_You…killed…Mwu!_

Dark emotions swirled into her heart. Anger. Hatred. Vengeance.

"_War is a vicious cycle. Someone's killed for killing another, then that person's killed for killing him. How is that kind of twisted thinking ever going to bring us peace?"_

Somewhere in her subconscious, a voice told her not to succumb to those dark feelings. Because if she did, she would be going against all that she stood for, all that they were trying to prevent. That voice told her to stop it; it told her that even if she did take revenge, it would not bring him back.

But at the moment, she didn't care, brushing aside all her logical reasoning. She was human. She _needed_ selfish revenge to put her mind at ease, despite the fact that it went against their ideals. But ideals were so trivial at this point. She succumbed to her weaknesses and ignored that voice.

She snarled low in her throat and gave her order with a hard single-mindedness, her voice bitter, angry, vengeful.

Three words formed on her lips.

"Aim…the Lohengrin."

---

Word count: 350

* * *

_AN: I really love doing these drabbles. It's a great challenge, getting the emotions across in such few words. This one was inspired by that hardened look of bitterness in her eyes as she told them to aim the Lohengrin. I wanted to write how she felt after, but this was such a good place to stop, and I don't want to ruin it. So I'll do that separately._


	34. Lost

_AN: continues_ _from previous chapter..._

**

* * *

Title/theme:** LOST  
**Genre:** angst/dark  
**Approx time line:** Phase 49 of GS  
**Summary:** _But it was so hard to retain her sanity when everything else of hers was lost. _

--

"FIRE!"

She yelled as the beam of energy shot from the Lohengrin. With fascination, her eyes followed the path of the beam and watched in awe as it slammed into the warship.

As she watched it crumble in the silence of space, she felt a sick satisfaction as her lips curled upwards into a grim but triumphant smile. She heard a collective sigh of relief from the crew, and let out the breath she didn't know she was holding.

Her heart felt no remorse. It was too full of other emotions.

In fact, she felt rather proud of her accomplishment, and felt a strange and appalling urge to laugh. Her mind was set at ease, knowing that she'd avenged his death.

But the moment of darkness had passed in her heart, and she suddenly became terrified. Terrified at what she had done. Terrified at what she had been thinking and feeling moments ago. Terrified that she too, had become like _them_.

Then she felt a slight regret as she questioned _Had I done the right thing? _

She knew that the Dominion was a threat to their goals, and that if she didn't take action, they would. And this time, he wouldn't be there to help them. But what frightened her was the fact that she had felt happy to see it disintegrate; satisfied and feeling triumphant as the battleship became merely debris in space. What frightened her was the glimpses of images her mind had shown her, as she thought up ways to make the one responsible suffer as she was suffering, to make him feel the excruciating pain that she was feeling without mercy. What frightened her the most was the image of herself staring down coldly at the mangled, broken body of the perpetrator without fear or remorse.

The first time that she had to kill someone, it made her stomach churn, and she had nightmares for days. But as time went on, she got used to it, pulling the trigger without blinking. However, never before had she felt _pleasure_ in taking someone's life; never before had she felt _proud_ for killing someone. And it scared her. She was horrified and sickened by herself.

The Strike had broken her heart, that much she was sure of. But did it shatter her mind as well? Was her sanity and morals crumbling along with her heart?

But it was so hard to retain her sanity when her everything else was lost.

"_We're not murderers, we're soldiers!" _

True. She was a soldier, not a murderer. But what was the difference? What distinguished one from the other? The line was so thin that she could've easily stepped into the undesirable.

_I'm, I'm not really like that, right? _

She felt sick as tears washed her face, suddenly feeling lonely and lost.

For the moment, she lost sight of everything. She lost sight of her hopes and dreams, lost sight of what she was supposed to be fighting for, what she _wanted_ to be fighting for. She'd lost herself and her sanity, when she lost sight of the Strike.

_Please, help me… _

She had needed him the most at this moment, and he wasn't there. Her inspiration for fighting was gone, and hopelessness filled her heart.

_What am I supposed to do now? _

She hugged herself as she shivered, choking on her tears. She had always prided herself for being strong and resilient, but she realised at this moment that she had only been fooling herself, that she was just as weak as everyone else. She had simply watched, helplessly, as he sacrificed himself for her sake. Then she had fallen to the darkness of her heart, because she was weak.

_But I'm only human, right? _

Was this what it means to be human, to have flaws and weaknesses, to feel pain, anger, hatred, fear? Was it fair for her to attribute her flaws to human nature, something beyond her control? Or was it simply an excuse to justify her actions?

Now she understood. Truly understood the causes and effects of war, and just how difficult it really was to end the cycle of hatred. She sympathized with the feelings of those left behind by those she'd killed.

She closed her eyes and saw his sad and disappointed face. _No Murrue, _it begged, _Please… _

No, this was not what he had wanted her to become. This was _not_ why he had sacrificed his life. She would not go down that path; she would _never_ follow that path.

She took a deep breath to collect herself. She needed to be strong, now more than ever.

She had already lost him. And now, she couldn't lose herself. She couldn't _afford_ to lose herself. She had to keep going, to continue for the both of them. And maybe, maybe she wasn't so lost and alone. Maybe he was still there, guiding her, helping her find the way.

--

Word count: 820

* * *

_AN: this one's kinda dark, hope Murrue's not -too- evil, but I wanted to show her weaknesses and her feelings as she realised what she'd done. Inspired by that look on her face as she watched the Dominion sink._

_the quote of being soldiers, not murders comes from Mwu, when he was lecturing Kira in phase 30._

_phew, this turned out a lot longer, and more philosophical, than I first planned. but oh well. review?_


	35. WinLose

**Title/theme: **WIN/LOSE  
**Approx time line: **After GS  
**Summary: **_There are winners, and there are losers._

---

Everyone wanted to win.

Win: v.

a. To take in battle; capture;

b. To achieve victory;

c. To gain the affection or loyalty of;

They were in the middle of a war, and there was no guarantee that they would win. But still, everyone wanted to win. They all had the mindset that if they tried hard enough, they _would_ win.

For him, winning was everything. He was confident that if he did his best, Victory would be his. That was what he believed. And that was what he promised. He had already won one thing that he desired, so what was stopping him from winning the other?

But winning wasn't for everyone.

Lose: v.

a. To be deprived of

b. To be left alone or desolate because of the death of

c. To remove (oneself), as from everyday reality into a fantasy world

They were in the middle of a war, and losing was a possibility. But they didn't want to lose. Nobody did. After all, everyone wanted to be a winner, everyone wanted to succeed. But in order for there to be winners, there had to be losers. The loser was the one who didn't try hard enough, or perhaps the loser was the one whom Fate frowned upon.

For her, losing was heartbreaking. She tried her best, but she was robbed of everything except herself. But all that Fate had left her, she willingly lost. She'd rather live in a world where _she_ wasn't the loser.

Life is a game. There are winners, and there are losers.

For them, they had both. Victory was theirs, but not without its cost.

He had won, but she had lost.

---

Word count: 280

* * *

_AN: something quick, trying out new writing style. original idea was them winning the war, but she lost; but idea changed as I was writing, and ended up this way. quite interesting, I must say._

_Sorry for all the angsty-ness, but I like writing these drabbles and can't seem to stop... hopefully the next one will be happier..._

_Definitions copied from dictionary. com. _


	36. Daydream

**Title/theme: **DAYDREAM  
**Genre: **humour  
**Rating: **PG 13, for innuendos XD  
**Summary: **_He did a double take and gulped nervously as he took in what she was wearing._

**--**

"Hey!" the Hawk of Endymion knocked on the door of the Captain's quarters before sauntering in casually.

"Oh, hello," she looked up and smiled at him.

Instead of sitting at her desk where he had expected her to be, she was sitting on the edge of her bed. When he walked in, she stood up to meet him.

He did a double take and gulped nervously as he took in what she was wearing. His palms started to sweat as his gaze swept her graceful body.

She wasn't wearing her uniform.

Not even close.

In fact, all she had on was a tank top and a tiny skirt that barely hid her ample curves. Around her shoulders was a thin, semi-transparent shawl that did nothing to conceal her pale, smooth skin.

"So, did you want something?" she whispered seductively as she moved closer.

He grinned, uncertainly at first, but it grew as he marvelled at the sight before him. She was the most beautiful creature that he'd ever seen. Her face was turned up towards him, her soft red lips were parted slightly, as if inviting him to taste them, and her eyes, her beautiful eyes of dark gold were brimming with, was it desire?

Was this…Did she…

"Well, that is, I…" he stammered, either too nervous or too pleasantly surprised to form a complete sentence.

"You know, we're all alone," she drawled in a husky voice as she placed a hand on his shoulder, then stood on her tiptoes as if to kiss him. Her soft breath tickled his hot face.

He swallowed again. Was she really…

"Well, that's, uh, well, great…" Once again, he found himself unable to talk properly. Why wouldn't his tongue work?

He could feel his heart pounding, though he wasn't sure whether it was from nervousness or excitement. Almost instinctively, he reached out to touch her.

"Oh Commander…" she laughed as her face came closer, her scent cascading over him. Her hands released the semi-transparent cloth and it fell from her shoulders, pooling on the floor.

"Commander…"

"Commander!"

Mwu blinked. There she stood in front of him, eyebrows knitted as she waved a hand in front of his eyes. He blinked again, and saw with slight disappointment that she was fully dressed in her uniform as she stood there, looking annoyed.

He cleared his throat and chuckled nervously. "I'm sorry, d-did you say something?"

She let out an exasperated sigh and gave him a withering glare. "I said, is there something I can do for you?"

He gave her a mischievous grin, and mumbled, "Heh, that would be nice, wouldn't it…"

When she raised a questioning eyebrow, he grinned sheepishly and elaborated, "I could tell you, but I don't think you'd want to know."

She narrowed her eyes in suspicion and studied him, then shook her head. "No, you're right, I _don't _want to know." With that, she humphed and kicked him out of her room, leaving him to his daydreams in the hall.

--

Word count: 500

* * *

_AN: hehe, think after all that angst, we could use some humour/innuendos XD. it was amusing to write (though somewhat difficult...) so, did I fool anyone?_

_inspired by a chapter from "Wing of Words", and phase 19 (of course)_


	37. Heaven

**Title/theme: **HEAVEN  
**Genre: **supernatural/spiritual  
**Approx time line: **After GS and AU Destiny  
**Summary:** "_This is what I've been waiting for all this time" _

--

An elderly woman stared out the window of the hospital, lost in thought. She stared at the clouds, wondering where the gateway to heaven was.

She knew that she didn't have that much time left here on earth, but she wasn't scared. In fact, she had been looking forward to this moment for a long time. It wasn't because she had a miserable life. No, she had quite a fulfilling life, the life that he gave to her, surrounded by friends who supported her and cared for her. She watched as they grew, found their paths, and started their own families. She didn't have a family of her own, but she didn't mind, her friends were her family. Still, there was always something missing, something irreplaceable…

"Are you going to be okay, Murrue-san?" the man by her side asked.

"Yes, Kira-kun, I'll be fine," she smiled at him. Kira was in his late sixties, but to her, he'd always be a little boy. He was like a brother to her, always there to take care of her. So when he looked somewhat worried at her condition, she assured him, "This is what I've been waiting for all this time." He nodded in understanding.

She smiled softly, closed her eyes, and took her last breath.

--

When she opened her eyes again, she was lying on a soft field of grass. Pushing herself up, she looked around.

The field ran on to what seemed like forever. In the misty distance looked like hills and mountains. Somewhere in the distance was a small stream, fed by a gentle waterfall. She could hear birds singing, but couldn't see any. The sky was the bluest she'd ever seen, like the colour of his eyes. It was light, and seemed to be daytime, but there was no sun.

_I guess this heaven then. _

She eagerly looked around, and saw only saw few people milling around in the distance. He was nowhere in sight. Suddenly, she felt unsure. What was she supposed to do now? How did she plan to find him in such a huge place?

The seed of uncertainty grew. Questions flooded her nervous mind.

What would he look like? She assumed that people's appearances here were the same as when they came here. So do people age in heaven? If they did, how would she recognize him even if she did know how to find him? And if they didn't…

He had always stayed the same in her mind, her heart. He had always stayed young, beautiful, perfect. But what about her?

She was no longer the pretty, young woman she was some half a century ago. Would he recognize _her_?

And even if he did, did he still want her?

Her heart had stayed frozen all this time, faithfully and patiently waiting for the time they would meet again. But now, she wasn't sure if it'd work out.

Had it been too long? Do people retain their memories in heaven? Do they change? Would he still even remember her? Would he still love her?

She sank slowly to her knees with that thought. Maybe she should've come here 50 years earlier. Because even if they did grow and change in heaven, they'd grow together.

She was so absorbed in her uncertainties that she didn't hear soft footsteps coming from behind her. She almost jumped in surprise as a pair of hands covered her eyes. Her heart sped up as a familiar playful voice tickled her ear.

"Guess who?"

* * *

_AN: inspired by a Milly/Tolle fic. _

_I dunno, do people age or change in heaven? I was gonna write more, with him telling her he didn't care what she looked like (or maybe she can choose to look whatever age she wanted), but I like this ending where it is. so you guys can decide :)_


	38. Accident

**Title/theme: **ACCIDENT  
**Genre: **humour/fluff  
**Rating: **PG 13, for innuendos XD  
**Summary:** "_Oh, I'm sorry Captain, I must be in the wrong room." _

---

Commander La Flaga yawned and stretched as he strolled along the hallway of the Archangel. He had been working on the Skygrasper for the last couple of hours, and the idea of a nice warm shower felt good right about now.

He yawned again, feeling the fatigue from his muscles and mind. He slept lightly for only a few hours the previous night, feeling the need to keep half-awake in case the enemy attacked.

_After a shower, I'm going to bed… _

He stopped by his room, grabbed a towel, and headed for the shower room, whistling to himself absent-mindedly.

The door to the shower room slid open with a swoosh as he came towards it. His tired mind wasn't really paying attention as he sauntered into the room.

However, there was someone in the way, trying to exit.

"Oh sorry," he apologized as he started to sidestep to make way for the other person, but stopped immediately in mid-step as his eyes made out who it was.

He was standing face-to-face with Murrue Ramius. Her hair was wet, and she was only covered by a fluffy towel wrapped around her body.

An awkward silence passed as they stared at each other. Both of their minds blanked, before trying to figure out what was going on.

"C-Commander!" she managed to stutter out as her face went beet red.

"Uh…" his sleep-deprived mind refused to function properly as he could only stare at her, stupefied.

"What are you doing in here?" she mumbled, pulling her towel upwards and looking away in embarrassment.

"Huh?"

He had wanted to ask her the same question. What was she doing in the men's shower room?

Unless…

He gulped. Did he just…

"Oh, I'm sorry Captain, I must be in the wrong room." He apologized immediately, hoping to save whatever shred of dignity he had left, and quickly headed for the door.

"Yeah…" she refused to look at him, her cheeks burning, and chose to stare at the floor instead. But something on the floor caught her attention. She bent down and picked up the object.

"Wait Commander!" she called out. He stopped and turned towards her.

"You forgot your towel," she told him as she held out the said object. He smiled gratefully and came toward her.

Unfortunately, she forgot that the hand that she had used to hold up her own towel was now holding out his towel.

Without the support of her hand, gravity won as the fluffy white towel around her body unravelled and slipped to the floor.

He stopped again mid-step as he stared at her, his mind blanked, once again refusing to function properly.

She realised too late. Her face went bright red again as she let out an embarrassed squeak. She tried to cover up using his towel, but not before almost instinctively shoving him away. The door slid open as he stumbled backwards and landed in the doorway.

Her whole body shook and was red with embarrassment, as she looked anywhere but at the man sprawled on the floor, halfway in the room and halfway in the hallway. And he quickly looked away, saving her some dignity.

One thing was for sure, he wasn't sleepy anymore.

And as if things couldn't get any more awkward, Natarle Badgiruel just had to choose this exact moment to pass by.

She raised a questioning eyebrow as she surveyed the scene before her, looking slightly disgusted.

"This isn't what it looks like!" Mwu and Murrue both protested at the same time.

--

--

"I can't believe you two!" Natarle scolded darkly as the three sat in the Captain's office. "What kind of example are you setting for the rest of the crew!" They didn't answer her, nor did they meet her angry gaze, finding the wall or floor more interesting.

She turned to Mwu with a death glare. "Of all people…Commander, what were you doing in the women's shower room?"

The man in question held out his hands defensively. "It was an accident, I swear!"

Natarle raised her eyebrow. She wasn't convinced, knowing him…

"I don't care what excuses you have. That was sexual harassment, and according to military code, you could be facing court martial right now," she told him.

He palmed his face. "I told you, I didn't mean to, honestly! I entered the wrong room by mistake," he tried again to clear his name. But the Lieutenant just ignored him and ranted on about the military code and how he should know better.

Meanwhile, Murrue sat behind her desk, rubbing her temples as she listened to the exchange. She had never felt so embarrassed in her life. But Natarle was making way too big a deal out of it, and she didn't feel it was fair to Mwu. He hadn't really meant to after all. And it was sort of her fault that landed them the awkward situation that Natarle had found them in.

"Oh drop it Natarle," she told the other woman, holding back her annoyance. "Like he said, it was an accident. I'm willing to look over it, and so should you." She stared at the Lieutenant, and missed the grateful smile that Mwu gave her then.

The two women stared at each other wordlessly, challenging one another. Mwu looked on, not sure whether to feel worried or amused.

"Why are you letting this go so easily Captain?" asked Natarle. Then with a sarcastic raise of an eyebrow, she added dryly, "Could it be that you actually liked it?"

Murrue wasn't expecting that. Her eyes widened and she quickly looked away, the redness creeping onto her face again.

Mwu grinned mischievously and wagged his eyebrows at her as this new possibility dawned on him via Natarle's comment. "Now there's an idea…" he mumbled to himself, his voice low enough that the other two (luckily) didn't hear.

Murrue's gaze turned to him by accident and found her face growing even hotter at the expression on his face. She quickly turned away again, but not before giving him a warning look.

"You realise, Captain, that I may have to put this in the report as well," the Lieutenant said calmly, deliberately ignoring the exchange between the other two, despite the fact that it was caused by her comment.

"What!" Murrue looked up quickly, horrified. "Natarle, you can't…"

"This is yet another…incident that I have to report," she reiterated her statement firmly.

"Don't tell me," Mwu spoke up before Murrue could, "That you're jealous, Lieutenant Badgiruel," he stated casually with an amused grin and a quick wink at Murrue.

Murrue had to bite her lip to keep from laughing as Natarle turned a deep shade of crimson in answer. They weren't sure if she was shocked or embarrassed or indignant. But it was pretty rare, and amusing, to see the prim woman looking so flustered.

With a slight growl low in her throat, Natarle stared at him and stated clearly through clenched teeth, "No. I'm not."

"Oh really," he raised his eyebrow the same way that she had, looking unconvinced.

She looked away quickly, seemed to swear under her breath, before she finally sighed and grumbled, "I'll overlook it _this_ time."

She turned on her heels, gave them a final disgusted look, and left the room with her head held high.

They waited until they heard her footsteps fade down the hall before bursting out laughing.

"Thanks Commander, that sure was an…interesting way of getting her off my case," Murrue told him between her laughter.

"Hey, any time!" he grinned. "That woman needs to learn to loosen up a bit."

"Hmm," she agreed. "I'm just glad that she's not reporting this. Because it'd be very, um, awkward."

Mwu imagined their superiors reading the report, and wanted to laugh at the mental image of their reactions. But in reality, he was glad too that Natarle had let this go. After all, it wouldn't look too good on _his_ record either.

"Look Captain, I'm sorry about what happened. I honestly didn't mean to." He didn't want her to get the wrong idea about him.

"I-It's okay," she answered. "And I guess I'm sorry for shoving you like that." She looked away, to hide her blush, but also to hide her sudden urge to laugh.

She didn't hide it very well, because he noticed and laughed, causing her to laugh as well.

"I guess military training does have its uses eh?" he laughed.

"Yes, but I would've never thought it'd come in handy in this situation," she answered with a grin.

"So," Mwu leaned closer, suddenly feeling bold as he wanted to know the answer to another question. "Was the Lieutenant right? Did you like it?"

That earned him a well-deserved slap on the cheek.

* * *

_AN: lol, I've been bitten by the humour bug XD. I was tempted to stop at when Natarle found them, but the second scene was too amusing XD_

_Inspired by a scene from the 2nd vol of manga, when Mwu got blamed on for spying on the younger girls, got water dumped on him and slapped by the girls, before getting chewed out by Natarle... poor guy... and he didn't even do anything..._

_I'm not sure whether Murrue has her own bathroom, but we see in phase 9 (?) that the girls do have a public bathroom with showers..._

_hehe, it was fun picking on Natarle at the end XD. The scene was kinda inspired by the 1st vol of the novelization (much better than manga, so many cute Mwurrue moments...), where it seems much more often that Mwu and Murrue ganged up on Natarle XD_


	39. Pawn

**Title/theme: **PAWN  
**Genre: **slight angst  
**Approx time line: **Phase 34 of GS  
**Summary:** _He knew that in the life he chose to lead, being the pawn that he chose to become, he'd eventually have to say goodbye._

**-- **

He didn't want to leave.

That much he knew.

As he slowly packed his bags with leaden hands, his mind kept on asking why, why did he have to leave. He knew that he didn't really have a choice, it wasn't his decision to make. But why?

Because he was a pawn for the military, having to go wherever he was told to, doing whatever he was told to. However talented and precious of a pawn he was, in the end, he was still just a pawn. And that was all there was to it.

That pawn's purpose had been to protect the Archangel and the Strike. And now that purpose had been fulfilled, the pawn had no reason to stay. Now that they had arrived at Alaska, there was no longer a place for him. The base had enough security, enough pilots to protect it. The Archangel didn't need him anymore. She didn't need him anymore.

But why was it so hard to leave?

He had been transferred around quite a lot during his years with the military, going on various missions with different teams. And while goodbyes had always been a bit sad, it had never been _this_ difficult.

Was it because he had finally found his place? Because he had found a place where he belonged, where he _wanted_ to belong?

Mostly, it was because of _her_.

She had been on his mind constantly since the inquiry, when he was told of his transfer. He couldn't get her out of his mind.

Would she be sad to see him leave? Did it hurt her as much as it hurt him?

He cared for her. He had grown fond of her, attached to her, in the past months.

That much he knew.

As he zipped his bag shut, his mind questioned, did she care for him as well? Or was he simply a pilot to her, just another crewmember, another comrade.

He wanted her to care. More than anything, he selfishly wished that she would care. Not because of his job, but because of who he was. Just as he cared and admired her, not just because she was the captain.

Maybe she did. Maybe she did like him, if just a little.

She had come to the hanger that day, begging him to stay with tears in her eyes. Was that proof? Proof that she cared?

Of course, his mind reminded himself, she could have done that because she didn't want to lose another pilot, the only pilot they had left at the time.

But his childish mind wanted to believe that she had come because she was concerned about _him_.

And as he wiped her tears away that day, he told her that he wouldn't leave.

Except now… he was breaking his promise. And it pained him to do so.

Would he ever see her again?

He paused as his mind asked that question. His hands shook a little as he slowly shouldered the bag.

Probably not, he answered himself. She was staying here, while he was going far away. What are the chances of meeting again in the chaos of war?

He was terribly saddened by that.

_Murrue… _

Maybe he should forget about her, forget everything that had happened.

But it was impossible. She had plagued his mind, haunted his dreams, for quite some time now. And he doubted he'd ever be able to forget her. He didn't want to.

He stepped out of his door, and bumped into her. Or rather, she bumped into him.

"Woah Cap'n! Are ya that eager to get rid of me?" he joked, trying to keep the mood light and his thoughts away from gloomy ones.

But he stopped as he saw the expression on her face. She was biting her lip, not a sign of laughter on her pale face.

It was the wrong thing to say. He mentally kicked himself as he mumbled an apology.

She eyed him and let out an exasperated sigh, and then reached out and rolled his sleeves down from his elbows, where he'd left them.

"Come on, can't you wear your uniform properly?"

He watched as she patiently smoothed out his uniform, and memorized every detail of her face, wishing time would stop for them, making this moment last forever.

But time waited for no one, and in the next moment, she beckoned him along, saying something about him being late.

He followed her silently, grudgingly. He eyed her figure. In the few months that she'd sat in the captain's chair, she had managed to fill that role quite admirably. She looked confident and composed, her back straight as she walked. But her head was bowed in defeat.

"Are you all right, Captain?" he asked gently.

She looked up and nodded. He noticed that her face was dry, and she looked calm and collected, her emotions tucked away carefully. But he wasn't fooled. He didn't buy it. He could see right through her, and it worried him somewhat. On the other hand, he realised that it also meant…

So she did care.

Maybe… he should tell her. Tell her how he felt before it was too late.

"Captain, I," he turned towards her, hands placed firmly on her shoulders and looked straight into her eyes of dark gold. But the words died on his lips as his blue eyes took in the sight of her. Dignified and poised, with her uniform neat in every spot, the image of her was every bit of a captain, a soldier. And it only reminded him how silly his notion was.

He felt a terrible pain in his heart, like it was being torn apart. He hadn't felt like that for a long time, since that night when the fiery inferno engulfed everything he had known.

This was why he had kept his distance, kept his heart floating above everything, out of reach. Because he knew that in the life he chose to lead, being the pawn that he chose to become, he'd eventually have to say goodbye. This was why those past goodbyes hadn't been as difficult, because he had remembered to keep his distance.

But this time, he forgot. Because she was different. Because she had a certain warmth about her that he had wanted to feel since childhood. Because she didn't see him as a pawn.

_Will I be all right without her? Will she be all right without me? _

He didn't want to find out. He'd always been curious, but this was one thing he didn't want to know.

As he held her in his arms, he closed his eyes and let her warmth fill his heart. Yes. He found a place where he wanted to stay, a place where he was important, because he was _him_, and not just another pawn.

* * *

_AN: yay, I'm not dead! I dunno, angst is so much easier for me to write..._

_I think Mwu obviously liked (if not loved) her by this point, and probably has a suspicion (or hope) that she felt the same. did he really know for sure how she felt? I actually have a theory that Murrue was the first person that Mwu really cared about and loved, so it was esp difficult for him to say goodbye._

_kinda a rewritten scene from chapter 18: Parting, from his side. I think I rather like writing for Mwu, it's interesting to try to figure out what he's thinking about..._


	40. Hair

**Title/theme: **HAIR  
**Genre: **humour  
**Approx time line: **Phase 45-46 of GS  
**Summary: **"_Do you think I'd look good with long hair and a mask?" _

**----**

Long blond hair.

Black uniform neat and tidy.

White gloves on both hands.

_A mask with cold glass eyes hiding his features. _

He raised his right arm, the figure in the mirror moved accordingly. He shook his head, the figure on the other side of the mirror shook his head as well.

_Is this…me… _

_Oh no, I've become… _

Mwu gasped as his eyes shot open in the dark room. He looked around, there were no mirrors, and no sign of gloves or masks or black uniforms.

_Okay, it was just a dream…_

Still a bit uneasy, he reached up and felt for his hair. He sighed in relief as his fingers told him the strands were short, just the way he'd left them.

Assured, his breathing calmed down. But as he went over the details of his dream, he shuddered involuntarily at the thought of himself becoming like _that man. _

The figure beside him stirred.

"Mwu?" came her sleepy voice as she rolled over to face him. "Something wrong?" she asked.

"I-It's nothing," he answered her as he tried to get that lingering image out of his head.

"Bad dream?" she asked. Her eyes were now open as they traced over his features.

"Heh, well, I guess you could say that," he replied sheepishly. "But it's nothing, really." He didn't want to worry her.

"Hmm." She decided not to ask. Instead, she snuggled closer to him, and went back to sleep.

"Murrue?" he whispered after a moment of thought.

"Hmm?"

"Do you think," he paused, suddenly feeling silly for wanting to ask his question. But he went ahead anyways. "Do you think I'd look goodwith long hair and a mask?"

She lifted her head to look at him quizzically, wondering where the sudden and random question came from. She was about to ask if he was joking when she caught a glint of worry in his blue eyes as he waited eagerly for her answer.

She sighed and lay back down. Stifling the urge to laugh, she asked instead: "Why would you want to hide behind a mask?"

He chuckled then, realising how silly and strange his question must've sounded to her. She was right, why _would_ he wear a mask?

"To save the world from blinding itself from my handsomeness, of course."

That drew a delightful giggle from her. "All right, you do that."

She was about to close her eyes when he asked another question.

"What about my hair?"

"What about it?" she asked, her voice muffled by his shirt.

"Do you think it'd look better long?"

"Why? Are you thinking of growing it out?" She wondered faintly where these random questions came from. But decided not to ask, because she didn't really want to know.

"Well, no," he admitted. "I don't know, should I grow it out?"

She sighed and reached up, ruffling his blond curls playfully. "That's up to you. I'd like it however you want to your hair to look."

He seemed to be slightly relieved at that, though he still seemed uncertain about something. But he decided to brush that aside; she wanted to sleep, and he didn't want to disturb her anymore. He was happy though, to know that she'd like him no matter what his appearance was like.

He shifted to a more comfortable position, drawing a happy murmur from her, and closed his eyes.

He was halfway to falling asleep when her drowsy voice reached his ears.

"But if you ask me, I like your hair the way it is…"

--

Word count :590

* * *

AN: I like his hair short too... a strange little idea that popped into my head a while ago, when I noticed how similar Neo was to Rau ('that man') at first, and how much _I wish Neo would chop off his hair! Long hair so does NOT suit Mwu!_

I think Mwu would've been rather worried if he saw himself in the future, looking (and acting a bit) like Rau XD. And the fluff was thrown in there.

Whee, 40 chapters! thanks everyone!


	41. Useless

_AN: no, I'm not dead... I wanted to write something with angst and humour/fluff, dunno if I've achieved it or not..._

* * *

**Title/theme: **USELESS  
**Genre: **angst/fluff  
**Approx time line: **after Phase 38 of GS  
**Summary: **_Perhaps that was the life he was meant to live. No matter how hard he tried to prove or redeem himself, he would always be useless._

**---**

_Useless._

That word stung like a slap on the cheek. It reminded him of all those moments in his childhood when he was told he was incompetent, that he would never amount to anything, that he was an idiot who couldn't do anything right.

As he watched helplessly when the fiery inferno engulfed everything he knew, he felt that word echo in the back of his mind again. Because he couldn't do anything for them. He could only stare and cry.

He _wanted_ to feel useful, because nobody liked to feel useless. He wanted to prove that he could do something right in his life. And that was why he decided to enlist in the military.

But when he went out onto the battlefield, that word haunted him once more. While nobody uttered it in his presence anymore, his conscience would repeatedly berate him whenever he failed to do something he could have.

Time and time again, that awful feeling of helplessness overcame to him as his comrades died around him, and all he could do was watch, not being able to save them.

Maybe that was why he empathized with Kira. Because the boy reminded him of himself. But once again, he could not do anything for the boy, except to make him into a soldier like himself.

Perhaps that was the life he was meant to live. No matter how hard he tried to prove or redeem himself, he would always be useless.

The door swished open, and he could hear her frustrated grunts. He saw that she was trying to reach a box from a high shelf that was just out of her reach. She was about to find a chair to stand on when she heard him come in.

"Mwu!" she beckoned him over, "Can you help me please? I can't reach."

He laughed as he walked to her side. Kissing her cheek, he grinned, "Not tall enough eh?"

She pushed him away and huffed, "Well I'm sorry that I'm short. Now are you going to help me or not?"

"Of course," he answered as he did as she asked.

She took it from him and gave him a mischievous smile. "I guess having you around comes in handy once in a while."

He laughed at that and hugged her, causing her to drop the box in surprise.

Well, maybe he wasn't so useless after all.

--

Word count: 400

* * *

_AN: this idea's been in my head for a while, but I've been lazy to actually write it..._

_I'm pretty short, so I know how it feels not being able to reach (and people tease me about it too...). wish I had Mwu around to help me XD_

_Review?_


	42. Stuck

**Title/theme: **STUCK  
**Genre: **fluff/humour  
**Approx time line: **Around phase 25-28 of GS  
**Summary: **"_The door won't open," he answered quietly, as if afraid to let her hear. "It's like it's stuck, or…"_

----

"Hey Commander, what are you doing?" asked the young Archangel captain as she peered suspiciously at the man sneaking around like a thief.

He looked around a couple of times before turning to her. Putting a finger to his lips, he gently shushed before answer with a grin. "I'm going to pull a prank on the Lieutenant."

She blinked, not sure whether to laugh or scold him. It also baffled her that he'd come out and tell her what he was going to do, knowing that he'd get in big trouble with any other captain.

Was that it? Did he think she was soft, that she'd let him get away with it?

That made up her mind. She'd give him a lecture all right.

"Commander, do you realise—"

But she didn't get to finish, because he cut her off with a finger to her lips.

"Shh. I'm going in," he told her as he started towards the room.

He wasn't even paying attention to her!

"Fine!" she hissed, "Do as you want. But I want _no_ part of it. Got it?"

But he was already out of earshot.

She sighed and left him to his antics. She'll just have him pay for it later.

She didn't walk far when an angry scream split the air and reached her ears. She turned towards the sound, wondering faintly if the Commander had something to do with it.

That notion was confirmed when he came running from the direction of the sound, laughing with amusement.

"Wha—" she wanted to ask him what he had done, but didn't get a chance to, as he grabbed her arm and pulled her along.

She glanced at him suspiciously. "Where are we going?" she huffed, struggling to keep up with his long strides.

"Hiding." He continued running without looking at her. She raised an eyebrow and wondered what he was dragging her into this time.

"Here!" He stopped abruptly at a doorway, making her run into him. He flattened his back against the door, so that he was hidden from the hallway by the hollow of the doorway. Before she could open her mouth to protest, he pulled her against him and held her close, so that she was hidden by the niche as well. She felt her face growing hot as she became very aware of his close proximity and felt the drumming of his racing heart.

"C-Commander!" she lifted her head to protest, and felt her face growing hotter at the mischievous grin that stared back at her. He said nothing, just placed a finger on her lips again.

"But—"

Her protest died as they both heard angry footsteps coming down the hall toward them.

"Crap!" she heard him mutter under his breath. Suddenly, he shifted and swiftly tapped on the device to open the door. When it opened with a swoosh, she found herself being dragged into the darkness with him. She was too surprised to protest as the door closed, a moment before the footsteps ran past.

They were both silent for a while, listening for any sound of movement outside. When the footsteps finally retreated, he let out an audible sigh of relief. Hearing his relief, she too let out a breath that she didn't realise she was holding.

It was then that she looked around and realised what room they were in. She shivered slightly as the cool air brushed her face. They were in the storage room, where the temperature was kept cold—though thankfully not freezing—to keep the supplies fresh. The room was dim, lit only by a small fluorescent lamp. But it was light enough for her to see the sheepish grin on his face.

"So, you wanna tell me what's going on?" she crossed her arms and glared at him.

"Heh, sorry about that," he told her instead of answering, turning away from her irritated gaze.

"What's going on Commander?" she asked again, her curiosity growing slightly.

He avoided her gaze still, pressing his ear to the door. "Hmm, I think it's safe now."

She sighed. Was he even able to hear her today? She shivered again, her body reminding her of the surroundings. Maybe it would be better to take it outside, where it wasn't so damn cold.

She thought she heard a slight whoosh, as if something was being shut off. She didn't think too much of it, until the light flickered off, replaced by the green glow of a backup light.

"Hey, what's…" she asked, trailing off when she noticed his attention was fully absorbed in his current battle with the door. She thought she heard him swear under his breath, and wondered if he was losing.

"What's wrong?" she asked as she came to his side to examine his predicament.

"The door won't open," he answered quietly, as if afraid to let her hear. "It's like it's stuck, or…" he straightened up and smacked himself on the forehead. "I forgot. Murdoch told me they'd be running some test today and shutting off parts of the electrical system."

"Great," she answered sarcastically. "Isn't there an emergency manual way to open it?"

He looked nervous as he answered, "I've tried. But I think it's broken." Then at her exasperated look, he added quietly, "I'll remember to tell Murdoch to fix that later."

She groaned in frustration and leaned her back against the wall next to the door, banging her head against it.

"Thanks a lot."

"Sorry. I'll get us out," he assured her, eyeing her somewhat warily, "Somehow."

"Good. You better. You got us into this stupid mess, and you're going to get us out of it."

"Heh, Don't worry, I always make the impossible—"

"Oh shut it," she cut him off. She was more than a little bit irritated that she was locked in this damn place when she had much better things to do.

"I said I was sorry," he answered in self-defence. "We'll get out eventually. Murdoch said the test isn't going to take long. We'll just have to wait for the power to come back on."

"And what am I suppose to do until then?" she questioned him.

He gave her a roguish grin. "Well, you can start by telling me your deepest, darkest secrets."

She snorted, biting down the urge to wipe that smug grin off his face. "Just be glad I'm not throttling you right now."

"Alright, point taken. I'll be quiet." He backed away from her, leaning against the wall on the other side of the door.

She sighed. How did she get into this again?

The silence was starting to get to her, making the room seem even colder. So she sat down on a crate and drew up her knees, trying to keep herself warm. She stared at the floor, her ears ringing with the silence. She shivered again. Oh, how she hated the cold.

Suddenly, she felt something foreign covering her shoulders. She looked up, and saw that he had taken off his coat and draped it around her shoulders.

"It's not much, but at least it'll keep you somewhat warmer," he replied at her quizzical glance.

"What about you?" she asked. Wasn't he cold in his T-shirt?

He folded his arms and shrugged. "I'll live."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, it's the least I can do, for…dragging you into this." The sincerity of the guilt in his eyes made her feel slightly guilty. She smiled a bit, feeling her anger melt away by his kind gesture. Maybe he wasn't so bad after all. She was starting to think that, until…

"Unless of course, you want _me_ to keep you warm," he waggled his eyebrows at her, his eyes containing that familiar twinkle.

She sighed. He'll never change.

"No, I'm fine like this. Thanks for the offer," she answered dryly.

She tugged on his coat to stop it from sliding down her shoulders, and to bring it closer to her, inhaling his scent from the fabric. She blushed slightly as she felt his lingering warmth on the cloth. She was no longer cold, that was for sure.

They lapsed into silence again. Who would've thought just waiting could be so hard.

"Hmm, good thing we're in Orb," he mused out loud. "Imagine if a battle was to break out, and we lost because the ship's captain and commander are locked in a freezer!" he laughed. "I wonder what the history books would say about _that_."

"That's not funny!" she exclaimed. But let out a laugh despite herself. Great. Maybe it was the stress, or the cold, but she was laughing at his sardonic jokes now. She decided to change the subject before he could take advantage of it like he always did.

"So what exactly did you do?" she asked nonchalantly, pretending not to care.

He grinned smugly, as if proud of his accomplishment. "I switched her shampoo with hair dye."

Her mouth dropped open as she stared at him incredulously. "You _what_!"

He shrugged, as if it was nothing. "I wanted to see what she'd look like with yellow hair."

She didn't know _how_ to respond to that. Except…

"You do realise that she's going to kill you, right?"

He sighed. "Yeah, I know."

"And she's probably going to add this incident to her report as well," she sighed in defeat.

His eyes widened as if that notion had just occurred to him. "Oops," he mumbled, "I forgot about her list." Then turning to her with genuine concern, "I'm so sorry Captain. I'll take full blame for it."

She wanted to retort by telling him it _was_ his fault to begin with, that even if he _did _try to take full blame, she would still be held responsible, because she was the captain after all. She wasn't sure whether she was more amazed or baffled by his actions. How could he even think about things like pranks? Didn't he realise that they were in the middle of a war? Didn't he realise how serious their situation was?

She wanted to scold him, but looking at him, her words died. She didn't want him to feel worse than he was already feeling. Besides, it didn't really matter anymore at this point. The incident had already happened. And she had already stopped worrying about Natarle's report by now; she had more important things to think about. She sighed again. How did she get herself into this again?

"Oh whatever," she chose to dismiss it. "It's not like this is the only thing against me."

He eyed her silently, not totally convinced that she was okay with it.

"But you just _had_ to drag me into it. Even though I said I wanted no part of it," she told him instead and glared at him with narrowed eyes.

"Sorry," he smiled ruefully.

"Hmph!" she turned her gaze to the door. "Just don't expect any sympathy from me when she strangles you."

She heard him laugh, then sigh. "Fine." Then, "Can you be a witness at least?"

"No." She tried, but found it difficult to keep the amusement out of her voice.

"Alright then," he chuckled at her response, "I guess I'll just have to die a lonely and gruesome death then."

"I guess you will," she confirmed matter-of-factly.

Silence passed again as the two sank back to their own thoughts. How long were they planning to shut off the power?

"Commander," her soft voice broke the silence finally, "How do you do it?" She turned to him with a troubled look in her eyes. "How can you be so…carefree, at a time like this?"

She expected him give a half-serious answer like he always did, but what he said instead was way beyond her expectations and comprehension.

"I have to be," he replied quietly after a pause, in a serious tone that she had rarely, if ever, heard from him. "Because it keeps me sane."

But before she had time to decipher his answer, the seriousness went as quickly and suddenly as it had come. He chuckled in his usual way. "Besides, it's fun to pull pranks."

"What, so they can get angry at you?"

"Well, no," he admitted. "It's fun to see their reaction and expressions, but I suppose the aftermath isn't too rewarding."

She rolled her eyes. Typical. He'd rather live for the moment than deal with the consequences, but she supposed that she wasn't all that different.

"But why Natarle? Aren't you afraid of her wrath?"

He chuckled nervously. "Yeah…I guess I didn't think about that. But that woman needs to loosen up a bit," he turned his gaze to her, "And so do you."

She returned his playful gaze with a death glare. "Don't you dare! If you ever try to pull something like that on me, I swear, I'm going to—"

"Alright, alright!" he backed up, holding up his hands in defeat and chuckling nervously. "I get the picture."

Even though he often teased her, he had never tried to pull a prank on her. She silently laughed to herself. So, he was more afraid of her than Natarle. Was she _that_ scary?

"Why do you always pick on me to tease then?" she asked quietly, as if wondering to herself out loud.

"Because you let me." She narrowed her eyes at that answer. He leaned closer, eyes twinkling and mouth turned upwards in an amused and teasing smile, "Besides, you look cute when you're annoyed." There, he did it again!

She didn't know whether to feel flattered or offended by that. She let out a breath and answered casually while examining her nails, "And I bet you'll look really adorable with a broken jaw Commander."

Her words hung in the air for a moment before it sank in. And when it did, he let out a hearty laugh, loud enough that she swore it could be heard throughout the ship.

_Great. Maybe someone will hear him and let us out. _

Then again…she wasn't sure whether she wanted to be found in her…predicament.

"Easy with the threats there Cap'n!" he managed to choke out between bursts of laughter.

She raised an eyebrow at his never-ending chuckles. Was her comment _that_ funny? But pretty soon, she found his laughter contagious, and started laughing with him. She wondered vaguely what her crew would think if they found the two of them this moment, laughing hysterically at nothing in particular.

_Must be the cold. Yeah, that must be it. _

It was affecting her common sense. First she laughed at his stupid jokes, now she started teasing him back with lame jokes of her own. It seemed that his demeanour was rubbing off on her. Maybe spending so much time alone with him wasn't such a bright idea…She made a mental note not to ask when he'd start something, lest it would bring her to a similar mess again. Why couldn't the mechanics hurry up and end the damn test? Preferably before she could lose her sanity?

As if on cue, the light came back on with a whirl. Mwu quickly made his way to the door and opened it with ease.

He stood in the doorframe and turned to her, gesturing as if to invite her. "Ladies first."

Murrue slowly stood up, shaking her legs to get the numbness out of them. She felt stiff from sitting too long, and numb from the cold. But nonetheless, she walked to the door with dignity and exited the room, with Mwu following.

"See, told ya we'd get out."

"Yeah," she answered dryly, "No thanks to you."

He frowned with feigned offence. And she couldn't help but let out a small chuckle as she headed to the bridge, with him following

Slowly, the warmth returned to her body. It was then that she realised she was still wearing his coat. A bit embarrassed, she quickly took it off and stuffed it in his hands. On closer inspection, she saw that his arms were covered with goose bumps. She suddenly felt guilty for being angry with him. She supposed that if she had to be stuck somewhere, she'd rather be stuck there with him.

"Thanks Commander. For keeping me company I guess. It was rather…entertaining."

Before he could open his mouth to comment, she quickly added, "But _don't_ let it happen again. Got it!"

"Aye aye, Ma'am," he mock-saluted, before leaving her, staring after his laughing retreating figure, bewildered but amused.

"_Because it keeps me sane" _

Maybe the fact that he acted the way he did was what kept her sane as well.

* * *

_AN: hehe, I've got this idea in my head for a while, just was too lazy to write it down..._

_Anyway, them stuck somewhere together alone, so cliché... but couldn't help myself, because I love them flirtin' with each other :) hehe, I imagine Mwu to be someone who loves practical jokes. but he's _so _gonna get it from Natarle XD. _

_I dunno if the AA has a storage room, or if the doors could open without electricity, but lets just say I'm taking creative license so they'd be in a convenient situation. Because the idea of him giving her his coat was too cute to pass up. _

_This turned out longer than I thought, in fact, it's my longest chapter so far._

_Boy, Murrue made a lot of threats..._

_Review?_


	43. Kiss

**Title/theme: **KISS  
**Genre: **Romance  
**Rating: **PG-13  
**Approx time line: **Phase 46-47 of GS  
**Summary: **_If there was one thing she liked better than to be held by him… _

---

Lips touching, caressing, dancing.

What a strange way to express one's affection!

For the longest time, she tried, but failed to comprehend the strange tradition.

Yet, when she melted under the warm caresses of his sun-like lips, she no longer questioned the absurdity of the ritual. She began to accept it as normal, natural. As natural as the Earth revolving around the Sun.

She no longer thought about the ridiculousness of the practice as his lips traced every inch of her skin, or when she tasted the tangy flavour of his. There was nothing surprising or unusual about the way his lips moulded against hers in soft, sweet, chaste, passionate, and desperate kisses.

Their first had been careful, guarded, _stolen_. But now…

What seemed a fantasy then became a necessity now. Because if ever there was one thing she loved, wanted, needed, more than being held by him…

…their lips met time and time again.

---

Word count: 155

* * *

_AN: I dunno, I've wondered why people kissed to show affection..._

_anyway, that's as close to limeness as you'll ever find from me..._


	44. Moment

**Title/theme: **MOMENT  
**Genre: **fluff  
**Approx time line: **Phase 41-47 of GS  
**Summary: **"_Yeah, but I'd rather spend the time with you,"_

----

"Murrue, do you have a moment?"

The woman in question turned to the voice and gave him an apologetic look. "Sorry, I'm kind of busy right now. Maybe later?"

He looked slightly disappointed. "But couldn't you do that later?"

She was about to answer, when something occurred to her. She knitted her eyebrows. "Wait, aren't you supposed to be on duty right now?"

He waved a hand in dismissal. "Yeah, but I'd rather spend the time with you," he replied as he slung an arm around her shoulder casually.

She laughed. "That's such a cliché thing to say, you know that?" But a blush crept in despite herself.

"I know," he kissed her dark waves, "But it sounds good, doesn't it?"

She untangled herself from him, drawing a small whine of disappointment from the back of his throat.

"Yeah yeah. Now get back to work, _Commander_."

But instead of doing that, he attached himself to her again and nuzzled her neck, causing her to gasp in surprise.

She sighed. She wasn't going to get anything done with him around.

"As your captain, I demand that—"

He cut her off with a finger on her lips. His eyes twinkled as he playfully scolded her, wagging his finger, "Don't abuse your power now, _Cap'n_."

She rolled her eyes and buried her head on his shoulder in defeat. She could never win against him when it came to this. She glanced at the pile of work on her desk and groaned. But he seemed oblivious to her predicament as he rubbed his cheek against hers.

"You're like a cat Mwu," she observed as his bangs tickled her face.

"Am I?" he made a happy noise deep in his throat that resembled a purr.

She laughed and poked him on the nose. "Yes. You're a stray that I picked up somewhere."

"Aww…But you've found me a home, right?" he looked at her with hopeful eyes, making her laugh again.

"Yes, I think I'll keep you around," she answered and brushed her lips against his brow.

Oh well, he always managed to find time for her; she supposed she could return the favour, just this once.

* * *

_AN: hehe, silly fluff again XD. Spontaneous little piece, that's why it's short. It was actually supposed to be the start of another idea, but somehow morphed into this (I think it's because I wrote it after rewatching phase 46)... dunno, I always wanted her to compare him to a kitty...so affectionate XD_


	45. Future

**Title/theme: **FUTURE  
**Genre: **angst/romance/fluff  
**Approx time line: **Phase 46-47 of GS  
**Summary: **_For the first time in his life, he had dared to look at the taboo future. _

---

"Murrue, are you busy?"

The young captain stretched and looked at her work in distaste. Yes, she was supposed to be busy, but…

"I guess I could use a break," she told him as she joined him at the door.

He grinned and took her by the hand, leading her into the hall. "Good. I wanted to show you something."

He led her to the observation deck at the back of the ship.

"Isn't it beautiful?"

She floated upwards and pressed her hands to the window. She let out a tiny gasp as her her eyes widened at the view. He was suddenly reminded of a little girl window-shopping, amazed by the beautiful dolls in the display case.

"Yeah…" she breathed as she took in the sight.

From their angle in space, the sun was just peeking out from behind the Earth, signalling the start of a new day for those its rays touched upon. In the far distance, galaxies glimmered in their cosmic dance. Everything was silent, peaceful, calm. If it weren't for the fact that she was wearing a military uniform standing on a battleship, she would've never believed that this place was witness to so much death and destruction.

"Nice view eh?" He floated up to join her, encircling her in his embrace.

"Yeah," she answered, leaning back on him.

They stared into the endless space together, enjoying each other's silent company.

"Would you believe," she spoke up, "That I used to be terrified of outer space?"

"Why? Because of aliens?" he chuckled a bit as he threaded his hand through her hair, wrapping the silky strands around his fingers.

"No," she laughed too. "Because it was just so big, so boundary-less. I was afraid that I would get lost in its endlessness."

"We all feel that way sometimes," he assured her. "Are you still afraid of it?"

She shook her head. "No, I learned to trust the navigation systems."

"Hmm."

He placed his chin on her shoulder and closed his eyes, taking in her scent. He never told her that he had the same fear of being lost in time and space, and still did sometimes.

"Murrue."

"Hmm?" she asked, her voice almost inaudible. She had closed her eyes as well, lulled by the warmth of his embrace.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"I—"

His throat suddenly felt dry, and his pulse quickened slightly. He took a deep breath, and let her gentle, rhythmic heartbeats calm him.

It took him some time to gather his composure. So when he failed to speak after a few moments. She cracked open an eye to look at him.

"Mwu, what is it?" she murmured.

He sighed and tightened his hold on her. Closing his eyes, he murmured softly into her ear.

"I, I don't have much to offer." He made a "heh" sound in his throat that resembled a laugh. "Actually, I don't have _anything_ to give you at all. Nothing except myself." He paused, and repeated the final phrase, as if musing to himself, "Nothing except myself…"

"It's okay," she caressed his fingers. "You know that's all I want."

He smiled and kissed her. "I know."

"I don't know anything about how things will go, but…"

He broke off and paused, as if contemplating his next words.

"But, if this war ends, if it ever ends," he continued quietly, "And we're both still alive, will you," he swallowed and hugged her tighter, "Will you come and live with me?"

Her eyes widened at those words. It was a simple question, but…

Was that…Did he just…

She gasped at that realisation.

She looked at his dim reflection on the window and tried to read his expression. But it was carefully kept blank, unreadable, indecipherable, as he waited for her answer.

But his eyes. They betrayed him. She saw a crack in his outward façade, revealing a vulnerability she'd rarely, if ever, seen. His crystal blue eyes held a hint of…was it fear?

Fear of what? Rejection?

No. That wasn't it. It was something more, something that she shared, yet it was beyond her comprehension.

He knew that he shouldn't have. He shouldn't be making a promise he wasn't sure he could keep. He had no right to give her—give them—a false hope. He was just setting them both up for the fall. However…

Now that he had a glimpse of a possible future, he had dared to hope.

Before, because of his fate as a soldier, he had accepted the fact that he _had_ no future. It was just a silly fantasy, a distraction that he dared not look.

But things were different now. For the first time in his life, he had dared to look at the taboo future.

And it scared him.

Suddenly, he was terrified.

Of what, he wasn't sure, just that there was an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach as he dared to tempt fate.

Before he knew it, those words had flowed out of him. Because he needed her assurance, needed her to help ease his fears. He wanted something to look forwards to, because he wanted to be human.

She nodded with tears in her eyes. A simple movement that he felt rather than saw.

There were no words, no romantic gesture or flowery speech. And that what all he needed.

He had nothing to give her, except himself, his life, his future. And that was enough for her.

He squeezed her hand in thanks. No words were said. No words were necessary.

He could only move forward into the endless future, thrusting trust to his fate and caution to the wind, hoping against all hope that it wouldn't betray him. But with her by his side, the future looked just a little bit brighter.

* * *

_AN: aww... dunno, thought this up as I was trying to fall asleep. I wanted to write a proposal scene that was sweet and subtle, but not sappy._

_Anyone who's seen Inuyasha probably can tell I was influenced by Miroku/Sango and ep 132 :)_


	46. Advice

_AN: sorry for the delay._

_I know I said I'd write for SEED Mwu and Murrue here only, but this idea's been sticking in my head, because I really do wish Neo would talk to Murrue about Stellar (among other things). and this doesn't seem like enough to stand by itself, so I'm putting it in here. so spoiler alert for anyone who haven't seen Destiny..._

* * *

**Title/theme: **ADVICE  
**Genre: **general  
**Approx time line: **After Phase 43 of GSD  
**Summary: **_He turned to her with startling blue eyes full of…anxiety and guilt. "Do you think, she'd ever forgive me?"_

----

"Mind if I sit here?"

Neo looked up from his food at the voice, and found the captain of the Archangel standing beside him, holding her own tray. He shrugged, and without hesitation, she lowered her tray onto the table and sat down beside him.

He didn't talk to her, or look at her. Truth was, he still felt unsure around her. He sort of wanted to spend time with her, but was either too shy, or too afraid. He felt that he had made the right decision to stay, but there was still that feeling of uneasiness that he was missing something.

"You look troubled," her soft voice gentle intruded his thoughts. "Do you want to tell me about it?"

"What, so you can save me?" he retorted, perhaps sharper than he intended. She looked surprised at his reply, but the moment passed, and she smiled gently and shook her head.

"No, I can't do that. I just think it'd be better for you to let it out. And I'm here to listen."

He looked at her suspiciously, before staring back down at his food. "I don't think you'd understand."

She looked thoughtful. "Hmm, maybe not. But how would we know that until you let me know what's on your mind?"

He sighed. She was so…innocent, so naïve and pure, sitting there wanting to know what ailed him. How could she possibly understand the turmoil he was feeling within?

"What do you want me to talk about? My deepest, darkest secrets so that you can tell me everything's okay?" he asked dryly.

He heard her sigh. "No. You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to. I just want to talk, that's all."

He stole a glance at her, and found her studying him. Her eyes had that look in them again that made him feel like she wasn't looking at him. Suddenly, overcome by curiosity, a question came into mind, and before he knew it, he blurted it out.

"This Mwu la Flaga, what happened to him?"

She dropped her fork in shock at the sudden question. Her eyes widened as she stifled a gasp, and Neo noted that her hands shook slightly. She looked away, hands folded in her lap, her hair hiding her eyes.

"I…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…" he stuttered, feeling awkward again.

"He…died…protecting this ship at Jakin Due." Her voice was such a low whisper that he could hardly make out the words.

"Oh." Neo looked down at his food again. "I'm sorry…"

Silence came between them as Neo considered this information. He faintly remembered the news about Jakin Due, though his memory was fuzzy as to where he was at the time, or whether he even fought at that battle at all. But, if this Mwu was dead, then why did everyone think that he was Mwu? Especially this captain. Sometimes she'd look at him in horror as if he were a ghost, other times she'd look at him with such tenderness that he was starting to believe that he really was who she thought he was.

"You were, close?"

Her shoulders twitched at his question. She nodded faintly.

So that explained her sadness when she saw him, looking so much like her Mwu.

"He said, he said that he'd come back," her soft, trembling voice broke the silence, "But he didn't."

"I see." Neo closed his eyes and tilted his head back. He paused a bit before asking his next question: "Are you, mad at him for it?"

She turned to him in surprise, or amazement, he wasn't sure which. She smiled, not the soft gentle smile he'd gotten used to, but a cold and distant smile, nostalgic and painful.

"I guess at first, I was. For not keeping his promise and leaving me behind." She stared off into the distance. "But I realized there was no point in staying angry at someone who could not feel it. Besides, I've learned that nothing comes out of holding a grudge."

He considered her answer. "Is it that easy to forgive someone?" he asked softly.

She looked at him in surprise. "I, don't know. Depends on the person and situation I guess."

"You know, I was fond of someone once," he spoke up after a moment's silence. "She trusted me wholeheartedly. And I betrayed her. I lied to her, telling her that she wouldn't die. I promised someone that she wouldn't have to fight anymore, but because of my own incompetence, she paid the price. And in the end, I, I couldn't even protect her."

He turned to her with startling blue eyes full of…anxiety and guilt. "Do you think, she'd ever forgive me for that?"

Murrue regarded him softly. He could tell she was somewhat curious as to who he was talking about, but she didn't ask. She turned away and shook her head. "The dead don't forgive nor do they blame. It is the living who carry the guilt and want to repent their sins. You needn't worry about asking forgiveness from someone who isn't here anymore. They can't hear you, no matter how much you scream, cry, or beg."

Neo was taken aback by her answer. He stared at her for a few moments, wondering if she was speaking from experience. She didn't look at him, staring down at the table instead.

Something in her eyes made him think that he underestimated her, that maybe, she did understand him. Perhaps, she even understood his feelings more than he did.

"Who are you, really?" he looked at her in amazement.

She smiled, somewhat sadly. "Just someone who wants to live peacefully."

"I see," he murmured. "Is that why you're fighting?"

"I'd like to think so," she nodded. Then sighed. "But we're hypocrites too, for we're trying to bring peace with weapons in our hands." She looked down. "Just like before."

"Oh?"

Instead of explaining, she starting talking softly, almost to herself, "It may sound conceited, but I feel obligated to protect the peace that he gave his life to bring. I mustn't let his sacrifice be in vain."

She then faced him and explained, "We, that is, the people on this ship, cannot agree with what either the ZAFT or the EA are doing. But we don't want anyone to die either. Because the dead can never have a chance at peace again."

"Is that why you interfered when we were fighting the Minerva?"

"Eh? Oh, yes. All we want is for the battles to stop."

"Heh, I wonder what Jibril would say to _that_."

Murrue's eyes widened slightly at the mention of Jibril's name. She turned to him, "You worked for the leader of Blue Cosmos?"

He looked surprised at her incredulity. "Yes, I lead a special team directly under his command." Then he remembered, he never did tell her, or anyone here, what role he played in the EA.

He choked out a bitter laugh. "Yes, a special team consisting of children being used as weapons and nothing more. They're physically teenagers, but they have the mental capacity of young children, so innocent, yet they've seen things that even make adults hurl. All they know is how to kill, in order to survive, or so I tell them." Then he gave another strangled laugh, "And if they had a pleasant experience that would interfere with their purpose, I'd erase them. Because who needs pleasant memories when all you live for is the next battle." He paused and chuckled hysterically. "Soldiers, they're my toy soldiers! And when they're broken, I'm not supposed to care. Because soldiers, like weapons, are expendable. I should know, because I'm a toy soldier myself!"

He laughed again before looking to her to get her reaction. He expected disgust, horror, or pity. After all, he doubted that she'd ever seen or heard of something so cold, so…inhuman. But instead, there was concern and overwhelming sadness in her soft eyes.

"Oh Mwu…what did they do to you…"

He flinched slightly as she called him by that name again. She never called him "Neo", not even once. He supposed he should be used to being called by "Mwu" now, but the thought of being referred to by a dead man's name made him feel uncomfortable.

He studied her carefully. He thought he understood her, but she continued to confuse him. If she had accepted that her Mwu was dead, then…

"Why?" he asked, "Why do you always call me by that name?" He blurted out the question that had been on his mind for a long time. He had been hesitant to ask before, but now since they were both being frank, he might as well find an answer.

"Oh," she was startled by his question and the blunt way that he put it. She turned away, slightly embarrassed. "I'm sorry. I…it's just that you look so much like him, I…just…"

Neo knitted his brows in annoyance. "I'm sorry about what happened to him. I don't know why I look like him, but please get it through your head, I'm _not_ your Mwu!" he muttered, his tone coming out slightly angry. Then he immediately regretted it. He opened his mouth to apologize, but she spoke first.

"I know," she replied softly, seemingly not offended at all. "I know I ought to. I can get my mind to accept it, but I can't force my heart to believe it." She chuckled softly, mirthlessly. "Maybe I'm still in denial, even after two years." She looked up at him, eyes full of helplessness and apology. "I'm sorry, but I can't help it. When I see you, I'm reminded of him."

Then it struck him. That gentle look of in her eyes, the concern and kindness she was showing him, the fact that she let him stay. It wasn't because she cared about _him_, it was because she thought he was someone who didn't exist anymore.

He suddenly felt bitter at that realization. Perhaps jealous as well. Bitter about the fact that she couldn't see _him,_ that she didn't really care about _him_.

Because like it or not, he had fallen in love with her.

Was it possible? Was it even allowed? She was an angel, and he, he was tainted, a corrupted soul who would likely be punished for his sins.

"Is that why you let me stay then?" he mumbled, more to himself than to her. He wasn't expecting her to hear him, so he was a bit surprised when she shook her head in answer.

"Then why?" he wanted to know.

She smiled. "Because you asked me to."

Neo looked away. Still thinking that he was only a substitute for the man in her heart. As if reading his mind, she whispered softly, that he barely heard her, "You're not here to replace anyone. I'm sorry if it seems that way, but like I told you before, Mwu…is someone irreplaceable."

Before he could digest her answer though, she looked at her watch and gasped. Then she smiled at him apologetically, "Please excuse me, I have to go now."

As she stood up to leave, he caught her wrist. She turned her soft caramel gaze to him, surprised but expectant.

"Could we," he broke away from her gaze, almost embarrassed to ask, "Could we talk like this again some time?" And he meant it, because talking to her did make him feel better. She was right, talking about it made him feel lighter, more relieved. And he felt that he understood her, and maybe himself, more. Maybe she wasn't as innocent or naïve as he first thought, but there was something about her that was so comforting. Perhaps it was what he needed the most right now.

She smiled, genuinely this time.

"Any time Mwu."

He flinched again, but returned her smile as he realised she was calling him that probably more out of habit than anything else.

"Thank you."


	47. Visit

**Title/theme: **VISIT  
**Genre: **general/fluff  
**Approx time line: **Phase 46-7 of GS  
**Summary: **"_I wish you'd come visit me more often. It's so boring here by myself."_

-----

Mwu la Flaga stared at the white tiles of the ceiling and sighed. He was bored out of his mind. He lifted his right arm to scratch his face, forgetting the needle still stuck in it. He winced and groaned in frustration. The past couple days had not been fun for him.

He exhaled again, debating whether he should go back to sleep.

_But I just slept for 3 hours…_

He glanced at the book lying on his pillow. Maybe he should read some more? He looked at the cover and immediately decided against it; reading just made his head spin.

Before he could decide on anything else, the sound of the opening door caught his attention. He turned, and smiled as the Archangel captain stepped into the room, carrying a tray.

"Hey," she sat down on the edge of his bed, facing him. "Did I wake you?"

He shook his head, smiling as her scent tumbled down towards him.

"That good." She held out the tray, "I've brought you lunch."

"Thanks," he replied, "I am getting a bit hungry."

As he tried to push himself to a sitting position, he winced as his stomach wound protested against the sudden movement.

"I'm okay," he assured her as she moved as if to help him, looking worried, "Just a bit sore," he smiled weakly.

"If you say so. Here," Murrue placed the tray onto his lap when he managed to sit upright.

"Thanks." He moved to take the fork, but stopped and turned to her with a mischievous grin. "I can't use my arm. Will you feed me?"

She just stared back at him, eyebrow raised. "You can use your left arm, can't you?"

With a defeated sigh, he nodded, "Yeah…I guess…"

"I think you're old enough to eat by yourself," she commented as she watched him pick up the fork, ignoring the grumbles coming from him.

Her gaze absentmindedly found his right arm, where a scar was starting to form, and wrinkled her nose. But he chose that moment to look at her and saw her expression. Putting down the fork, he poked her right shoulder gently.

"Now we match."

She stared at him, confused. "What?"

"Now we match," he repeated, pointing to his new scar. "You have one on your right shoulder too, right?" He was referring to the wound she'd received at Heliopolis. That seemed like so long ago now.

She laughed at his strange observation. "You're weird Mwu."

"Yeah, I know," he replied matter-of-factly, grinning.

She shook her head and rolled her eyes. "Eat your lunch," she instructed.

"Yes ma'am."

Murrue laughed again. It was so weird to hear him call her that. But he was joking and laughing, which meant he must be feeling better.

_Unlike last time I was in here… _

Last time, he was depressed and angry as he told her the story of his childhood, and his relationship with his father. It was the first time she had seen him like that, and frankly, it scared her. For the past months, he had always managed to keep a calm front, and that had helped sooth her nerves. But now… even he was injured. She was starting to wonder if they were going to be okay.

"Hey, are you okay?" A gentle, calloused hand brushed her hair back, snapping her back to reality. She hadn't realised that she was staring at the floor.

"Who me?" She turned her attention to him.

He let out an exaggerated sigh, "Well, I don't see anyone else I could've been talking to."

"Why wouldn't I be," she replied softly, looking away. "You're the one who's injured."

He sighed. "Murrue, you know you can tell me right?"

She heaved a sigh. She knew she'd never hear the end of it until she told him.

"I was just thinking if we'll be all right. I mean, even you ended up like that…and I," she bit her lip, "What would happen if you…" she trailed off, unwilling to say the words.

He sighed, put his fork down and cupped her face with his hand, forcing her to look at him in the eyes.

"First of all," he lectured, "What makes you think that I'd get myself killed? I wasn't properly prepared last time, I didn't have the right equipment. And secondly," he released her and let his hand fall back. "Even if I," he cut himself off, thought for a moment and sighed. "Murrue, the world doesn't stop for anyone. No matter who dies," he looked at her sharply, hoping she'd understand what he was trying to say, "The Earth will continue to turn."

"Assuming that there is an Earth left to spin," she mumbled under her breath.

"Since when did _you_ become the pessimist?" he chided.

She didn't answer, and he scowled. As far as he could remember, she had always been pretty optimistic, from when they were running from Heliopolis to the battle of Orb, she had always tried to look at the bright side, determined to try and make things work out. Now, seeing her so discouraged, he wasn't sure whether to be worried or scared.

"You know, if the captain loses spirit, the crew would be disheartened too."

"Yes, I know that!" she snapped, and he recoiled, realizing she probably didn't need to be reminded of her responsibilities.

"Sorry," she mumbled, not looking at him.

"Is this about the Dominion?" he asked gently.

She sighed. "When I told her that I hoped to meet her again, this isn't exactly what I had in mind…" She had known Natarle since they were assigned to the 8th fleet. While they weren't exactly best friends, they had always held a certain respect for one another.

"So that's where they've placed her," he mused aloud. "Makes me wonder where I would've ended up if I had gotten on that submarine…"

"Hmm," was all she said. She wanted to say that if he _had_ gotten on that submarine back at JOSH-A, they wouldn't be here right now.

"I never thought I had to fight against someone I know so well," she exhaled again, "I guess now I know how Kira-kun must have felt."

He didn't say anything, just rubbed her shoulders gently.

"But," she continued, sounding determined, "I won't hesitate." Then she looked at him, seeking confirmation, "We do what we have to, right?"

"Right." He leaned forward, ignoring the protests of his stomach, and kissed her gently.

When he pulled away, she blushed and smiled to herself. Not sure of how to reply, she picked up the book on his pillow and flipped through it absentmindedly

"You know," he stroked her dark waves, "I wish you'd come visit me more often. It's so boring here by myself. All I do is eat and sleep, I feel so useless."

She smiled sympathetically and patted his hand. "I know, but the more you rest, the faster you'll heal. Besides," she put the book back on the pillow, "I see that you're reading too."

He made a face and gestured to the book. "Yeah, the Strike's manual. Not exactly the most interesting reading material."

She laughed, "Well, at least you're making good use of your time."

"Yeah…but I still wish you'd come more often…"

Murrue smiled at his pleading face. "All right, I'll try to come whenever I have time."

She suddenly found herself being pulled into his embrace. She rested her head in the crook of his neck and sighed.

"Rest and get better soon Mwu, okay."

He smiled. "Of course. I'd rather stay in your room than here anyway."

She laughed at his comment. "Yeah…I knew you'd say that."

"Well, it's true," he yawned.

She giggled at that gesture. Noticing the empty tray, she grabbed it and untangled herself from him.

"I think it's time you go back to sleep," she observed as he stifled another yawn.

"No, not yet," he protested, because he knew that meant she'd be leaving soon.

"Go to sleep Commander."

He scowled. She only called him Commander now when she wanted to remind him who was the boss.

"Oh fine." He lied back down, making a show of grumbling all the way. She just rolled her eyes and ignored his theatrics.

As she moved to stand up, he grabbed her wrist. She looked back, expectant.

"Murrue, could you stay with me until I've fallen asleep?" he requested softly.

Her face softened at his boyish expression. "All right Mwu, I'll stay for a while longer."

As she watched the gentle rise and fall of his chest, she thought back to what he said. While it was true that the Earth will continue to turn no matter who is here and who isn't, she was glad that they were both here now.

* * *

_AN: wow, look at that, I'm still alive! Anyway, more fluffiness... I feel kinda rusty writing seriousness... I have a couple of chapter ideas lying around that should be finished... but can't find how... issues with writing angst still..._

(insert shameless self-plug)

_Anyway, for all of you Mwurrue fans out there, I've created a Mwurrue shrine. It's still largely unfinished, but I've finished putting up the graphics and finished the fanart and fanfic sections. Since takes out any links I put here, I've put the link up in my profile. So go check it out!_

(end shameless self-plug)


	48. Lean on Me

**Title/theme: **LEAN ON ME  
**Genre: **fluff  
**Approx time line: **Phase 45-47 GS  
**Summary: **"_You don't have to stand by yourself."_

----

"Mwu? Are you in there?" Murrue peered into the dim cockpit of the Strike and called.

She received no answer, just sounds of a keyboard clacking. She sighed.

"Mwu I know you're in there. Why don't you come out and take a break?"

A moment of silence, before she heard him sigh. "Sorry, not right now. I'm busy."

"Too busy even for me?" she asked, pretending to be hurt.

The tapping paused. He poked his head out and pouted. "Cap'n, that's not fair."

She laughed. "I know, but I got your attention, didn't I? Besides, I learned from the best."

Mwu laughed too. "Yes, yes you did." He climbed out of the cockpit and kissed her. "And you're a good student, Murrue."

She blushed at the kiss and the use of her name. "Uh, I was on my break and thought you could use some company."

He stretched loudly and sat down on the shoulder of the mobile suit. "Well, thanks for coming," he grinned at her, and patted to the spot beside him, motioning for her to sit down.

"So how are things going for you?" she asked as she sat down.

He shrugged and grabbed a clipboard lying around. "Okay I guess. I'm still getting used to some of the functions of the Strike, and then there's the maintenance that takes forever."

"So I guess being a mobile suit pilot is harder than you thought eh?" she commented, hiding her spreading smile.

"I never said that," he narrowed his eyes at her. "Besides, even if it is harder, it's my job now, and I'll do my best."

She smiled. "Thanks for your enthusiasm Mwu."

"Sure," he agreed, flipping through the pages on his clipboard. "What about you? How's things on the bridge."

She shrugged. "Okay I guess. We don't have to worry about supplies too much, and we're doing okay on the repairs."

"Mmm," he made the sound of agreement absentmindedly, obviously distracted as he kept his eyes on the clipboard, brows furrowed in concentration.

Murrue sighed. He wasn't even paying attention to what she was saying. She waited for him to finish reading the page, but when he was done, he went to the next page. She exhaled again. The whole reason she called him out of the cockpit was so that he could stop working and relax.

Narrowing her eyes, she reached over and took the clipboard from him. That got his attention all right. He stared at her blankly, as if he just woke up from a nap.

"W-What," he looked at her, confused, before trying to reach for the clipboard, "Give it back Murrue."

She shook her head and held it out of his reach. "You need a break Mwu."

He sighed, but didn't look relaxed. In fact, he looked distraught.

"Give it back," he repeated, "I need to finish checking…"

He was interrupted by a yawn that he barely managed to stifle.

Murrue giggled, but turned serious as she studied his face carefully. She noted that there were dark circles under his eyes.

"What you need is more sleep."

He merely nodded as he stifled another yawn.

She sighed and looked down at the clipboard. They'd silently agreed to lean on each other from the beginning. But was she depending on him too much? Was she taking more than her share?

She glanced at him again, slightly worried, because he looked stressed and tired.

He had changed. Ever since the Mendel incident, he had changed. He had taken a much more serious attitude, joking less and making a lot less sarcastic comments. Her heart went out to him. She struggled to understand him, to understand the stress and responsibility that he shouldered from the knowledge he had been given at Mendel, as he prepared endlessly for the inevitable battle ahead.

"You know Mwu," she started softly, holding the clipboard away from him as he tried to grab it again, "You don't have to stand by yourself." She looked at him earnestly, and he stopped reaching for the clipboard to listen.

"You don't have to stand alone," she repeated. "If it gets too hard, too tiring, you know that you can lean on me, right?"

He paused as her words sank in, before smiling softly, gratefully, and nodded. "Yeah, I know."

She smiled and looked at the head of the Strike. There was still a lot of work to do, a lot of preparations. But for now, she just wanted them both to take a break.

"Don't work too hard, okay Mwu," she whispered softly.

"Mwu?" she asked again when there was no answer. Then she suddenly felt a weight on her left shoulder.

She looked, and had to stifle a laugh.

He was already asleep, using her shoulder as a pillow.

She had to smile at his gentle, sleeping face, so much like a child. His hand still clutching the screwdriver. She gently ruffled his blond curls, drawing a happy murmur from him.

She laughed, before wrapping her arm around his shoulders. She shifted closer and rested her head on his, closing her eyes contently.

"When I said to lean on me, I didn't mean literally…"

* * *

_AN: this one came from the idea of Mwu falling asleep while leaning on Murrue, it was just such a cute mental picture :)_

_Anyway, I actually started out drawing a picture of that idea, and thought why not write it too :)_

_btw, the picture can be found here (remove the spaces) www. geocities. com/ mwurrue/ artMM14.html or go to my profile for the link._


	49. Letting Go

**Title/theme: **LETTING GO  
**Genre: **angst  
**Approx time line: **After GS  
**Summary: **"_Stop it Murrue, you're only hurting yourself."_

------

"Ding-dong."

The church bells echoed in the silence of the dusk, calling the day to a close.

In the warm light of the sunset, a woman walked into the churchyard, carrying a bouquet of flowers. The gentle sea air tossed her chestnut hair, dyed amber by the setting sun.

She walked around the building to the little graveyard beyond. This private place had been around for quite a long time, as some of the tombstones dated back to the AD era. But in a quiet little corner stood a few monuments where fresh flowers still kept them company.

She picked her way over to her destination, standing before one in particular. It was simple marble, on it, engraved the words:

_Mwu la Flaga  
CE 43—CE 71  
Loyal friend,  
Brave hero.  
Hawk of Endymion _

Such simple words for such a complex man. But when they asked her what to put on it, she was suddenly at a loss. How could she sum him up with such few words?

She bent and gently placed the flower in front of the stone, picking at a few weeds absentmindedly. She gently traced his name with her fingers, feeling the cool marble brushing against her skin.

It was empty, the grave, as most soldiers' were. They never managed to find a single trace of him, not even a single speck of stardust to hold his fleeting soul.

She didn't know whether the military gave him remembrance. Probably not. So she and the others gave him a place to rest behind Reverend Malchio's church.

It saddened her. That all that was left of the great Hawk of Endymion was an empty grave, along with few other memorabilia, and the precious memories of those few who knew him.

She still found it hard to believe, hard to accept and swallow. In some recess of her mind, she refused to believe that he was gone for good. Because they never found his remains, some part of her heart wanted to believe that he was still alive by some miracle.

"Stop it Murrue, you're only hurting yourself."

She didn't turn around at the voice, or reply to it. Instead, she closed her eyes and tried to block it out.

"Please stop this already. You need to accept it and move on," the voice repeated.

_No, I won't. I won't accept it. _

The figure moved closer and tried to place a hand on her shoulder. She flinched at the ghostly touch and swatted the hand away.

"Murrue…" he sounded hurt, disappointed, sad. "Please…"

"No, _you_ stop it!" she finally turned to face him, eyes shining with unshed tears, making him back away in surprise at her sudden outburst. "Why are you doing this? Why do you insist on crushing my hopes like this? It, it's all I have left!" The last bit came out hysterically as she choked on her tears.

"Because I don't want you to hurt yourself anymore…" he answered quietly. "All you're doing is hurting yourself by refusing reality and giving yourself false hope. And it's going to hurt even more when that hope breaks."

"Oh as if that's anything new," she retorted. Suddenly she was angry at him, angry at everything. In a flurry of anger, she took a lily from the bouquet and flung it at him, and missed.

"I'm sorry," he picked up the flower and placed it back with the others. "But I'm not here anymore, so what good is it to make yourself angry?"

"I don't know, I just…" she trailed off, the anger leaving her. Suddenly, she felt tired as drops of tears fell on white petals.

"Don't be so stubborn Murrue." He knelt beside her and brushed back her hair and caught her tears. "Let go."

"Why should I?"

"Because you want to, because your conscience says so. Because part of you has already accepted it."

She looked at him strangely, "How do you know?'

He smiled sadly as he straightened up. "Because, you agreed to create this," he gestured at the marble monument, "Besides, I'm only a figment of _your_ imagination, remember…"

She watched as he faded into the night, his voice just an echo in her jumbled mind.

She turned back and stared at the cold marble, feeling the tears dry on her cheeks and sighed. She had lived most of her twenty-six years without him in her life, so why couldn't she do it again?

Because he had left a footprint in her heart, an everlasting impression that would never go away. And when he left, he took a piece of her heart with him.

She looked at the empty grave again. Maybe it was time that she _did _let go. She had tried on many occasions, but never had the courage to let go completely. Part of her stubborn self refused, and another part of her was afraid, afraid that she had nothing else left besides that empty hope, and once she'd let it go, she'd be as empty as the grave in front of her.

She didn't know which hurt more, knowing that she was only fooling herself, or the emptiness.

Murrue closed her eyes, said a silent prayer, and left him to rest in peace, knowing that tomorrow she'd try again.


	50. Reason

**Title/theme: **REASON  
**Genre: **general/fluff  
**Approx time line: **Phase 38-39 of GS  
**Summary: **_What do you think we should fight for now?_

---

"So, I guess we're fighting the Alliance eh," Mwu commented, setting his mug of coffee down on the captain's table. "Hmm, I never thought I'd bite the hand that fed me for such a long time. But, that's what they get for betraying me."

"Technically, they didn't abandon _you,_ Commander," Murrue reminded him quietly.

"Pfft!" Mwu rolled his eyes. "But that's because I was still of use to them. I'm sure that as soon as I become unable to pilot, they'd throw me away in a blink of an eye."

"But you already knew that, didn't you?" she inquired, her gaze travelling towards her Earth Alliance uniform hanging beside her bed. "We chose to enlist in the first place, and somewhere in our minds we always knew this would happen one day, that we'd have to throw away our lives if they told us to, didn't we? I mean, soldiers aren't supposed to complain about or question their orders."

Mwu sighed. "Yes, I know. But I still felt it was underhanded. I mean, I suppose it is a brilliant tactic when you look at it from their point of view, but for those who fought their hardest, oblivious to the fact that they were merely bait...It's hardly fair. Don't these people have a conscience?"

"Fair?" Murrue looked up at him and wanted to laugh at the absurdity of his words. "Since when is war fair? I think they have more important things to worry about than fairness. And you know how your conscience can be fooled and convinced."

"Yup," he nodded, understanding exactly what she meant.

"I wonder if Natarle made it out okay..." Murrue started, trying to change the subject.

"Oh I'm sure she'll be fine," Mwu took a sip from his coffee. "She's still useful to them. And she is probably still blind to it all and follow their orders like an obedient dog."

Murrue raised her eyebrows. "_We_ were blind to it too a couple of days ago, you know," she said quietly.

He sighed in defeat. "Yeah... But now that we're ur, free, we have a choice. What do you think we should fight for now?" he looked at her intensely.

She looked away and shrugged, "Peace, I guess."

"And how do you propose we do that?"

She looked at him, trying to decide whether he was serious or just teasing her. She couldn't tell, but it seemed like he was testing her.

"I thought you already knew. We've chosen to fight alongside Orb."

He arched an eyebrow. "And you think _that_ will lead us to peace?"

She narrowed her eyes. Yup, he was definately testing her. Exhaling, she looked to the side again.

"Do you remember the last time we were here Commander?"

He smiled to himself, remembering the outing that they had. "Yes."

"You said that it was so peaceful here, that it's hard to believe that there was a war going on a few miles away."

"Yes." He didn't see where this was going.

"Well, I feel this is like the last paradise on Earth..." she told him, slightly embarrassed, "And I wanted to protect it."

He smiled. "Okay. Then that's what I'll fight for too."

"Eh? But shouldn't you be finding your own reason?" she looked up at him.

He smiled softly at her. "But I already have found my reason, Captain," he winked, making her blush.

Mwu stood up and stretched. "Well, guess I should get back to work. I have to prepare, getting used to the Strike and all."

"Speaking of which, Commander…" she trailed off, biting her lip, as if unsure.

"Yes?" he turned back to her, waiting.

"Um, the Strike, it's your first time fighting in it right? So uh," she looked up at him, almost nervous, "Be careful okay?"

His eyes softened. With a few strides, he walked to her side and kissed her cheek.

"Don't you worry about me," he straightened up, plastering his cocky grin on his lips again. "You just make sure I've got a place to come back to, Missy."

With a wink, he left her, dumbfounded.

For a moment, she just sat there, not sure whether to feel assured or worried or offended by his reply.

Then she sighed. Something told her that it was no use worrying about _him_. He could take care of himself.

She leaned back on her chair and closed her eyes, smiling as she felt his lingering kiss. She mumbled softly to herself.

"Aye aye, Commander…"

* * *

_AN: hehe, so adorable! I love the idea of Mwu calling her 'Missy' :)  
_

_wow, 50 chapters! thanks everyone for their support! Shall I continue this?_


	51. Zero

**Title/theme: **ZERO  
**Genre: **angst  
**Approx time line: **After GS  
**Summary: **"_You miss him too, don't you,"_

----

The young captain of the Archangel wandered around the hangar, watching the crew unload various pieces of machinery.

They have already landed in Orb, and were getting ready to disembark, but not before the equipment has been unloaded.

Her eyes fell to a corner of the hangar, where the Strike used to be. She suddenly felt choked up as her eyes took in the pieces of scrap metal—all that was left of the once-powerful machine. So she quickly turned her head away and headed in the opposite direction.

Her feet took her to a remote space, where unused equipment lay. A flash of white caught her eyes. She did a double take, and felt choked up again as she recognized the broken Skygrasper.

Slowly, carefully, she wound her way over to it, placing a hand gently on the white body, the cool metal calming her beating heart.

The blue-and-white plane sat there silently, forgotten and broken. They never bothered to fix it, because they no longer needed it after Alaska. Why they still kept it on board when they were in outer space, she had no idea. Probably because they were all too busy to pay attention to such minor trivialities.

"I'm sorry," she whispered to the plane softly, feeling guilty that they've left it behind, tucked away in a remote place gathering dust, after all that it had done for them. It stared back at her silently, neither blaming her nor forgiving her.

She sighed, and almost laughed at herself. She was talking to a plane, of course it wouldn't respond!

"Maybe we'll fix you up someday," she mumbled absentmindedly, though she knew it probably wouldn't need to fly again.

She gave its metal body a final pat, before walking away.

As she was about to leave, something orange peeked out at her from behind the Skygrasper, as if beckoning her. Mesmerized, she found herself drawn to it.

She made a noise that sounded halfway between a laugh and a cry as she saw what it was.

The Mobieus Zero stared back at her, studying her with its hawk-like eyes.

"So that's where you were hiding." She went over to it and patted it fondly. The Zero answered with a metallic sigh.

"I know," she whispered as her pressed her forehead against its cool side, "You miss him too, don't you."

She was answered with silence. She sighed.

"_Prep the Zero for me, I'm going out again!" _

At the time, she scolded him for being so ridiculous, because all she wanted was for him to come back safely to her.

"You know, we're pretty similar," she spoke up again, her voice echoing in the hangar. She laughed mirthlessly and shook her head. "He said he'd come back for you, and you waited faithfully for him, just as I did," the laugh suddenly turned into a strangled sob, "But he never did, did he?"

The Zero didn't answer, listening quietly to her tearless sobs instead.

"Heh, look at me, I'm talking to machines now." As she said that, she suddenly felt silly, and there was a strange impulse to laugh at herself.

She used to tease him when he spoke to the Zero, who would've thought she'd do the same thing someday.

"He's fond of you, you know?" she told the orange mobile armour. "Even after getting the Strike, he hadn't really forgotten you."

She laughed as she remembered the way he used to brag about his Zero. Like a proud father.

"_So, now that you got a new toy, you've gotten tired of the old one?" she peered into the cockpit of the Strike where he was busily testing out its various functions. _

_He stopped and looked at her with a raised eyebrow, "What do you mean by that?" _

_She laughed. "I'm talking about the Zero," she answered, "Or have you forgotten it already?" _

_He looked offended. "Who says I'm tired of it?" He exited the cockpit and stared at her accusingly. _

"_Well, you don't use it anymore," she answered nonchalantly. "Besides, aren't you always insisting to me that you are a 'mobile _suit _pilot' now?" _

"_Hey, that doesn't mean I'm tired of it," he protested, laughing. "I still go see it sometimes. I'm very proud of it you know. After all, I'm the only one capable of using it, and—" _

"_Yeah yeah, I know," she cut him off with a wave of a hand, "You've told me a million times, o great Hawk of Endymion." _

_He pretended to look like his ego was hurt, before laughing along with her. _

"_So, I guess the Zero is your precious darling still?" she asked sarcastically with a raised eyebrow. _

"_Nope," he surprised her by pulling her into his arms and kissed her brow, "You are." _

_She couldn't help but laugh, shaking her head. "You're so cliché Mwu." _

_He didn't answer, kissing her instead. _

She wanted to cry at the memory, but her tears have run dry by now. Instead, she kept talking to the silent Zero.

"You were fond of him too, right?" she caressed the orange metal slowly. Even though the Zero was simple and outdated compared to the new mobile suits, it had always managed to keep him safe somehow. "So thank you."

She suddenly got the impulse to look inside, to see the cockpit, hoping to discover a trace of him, his presence.

Using the lift, she climbed on top of the mobile armour. Opening the hatch door, she carefully peeked inside.

This was actually the first time she had ever looked into the belly of the machine. And what she saw…she was sorely disappointed.

The cockpit was clean. Too clean. All she could see where buttons and controls. No memorabilia, or any sign that he'd ever been in there at all. Maybe if she went inside…

Slowly, carefully, she found her way into the seat. She looked around at the unfamiliar surrounding. The cockpit was tiny compared to the Strike's.

She brushed her hand against the controls, telling herself that his hand had been here once, and trying to draw any lingering feelings that she thought she'd get.

Nothing.

She leaned back into the chair and closed her eyes against the metal embrace of the Mobieus Zero. She was hoping to feel something. But she couldn't feel his presence at all. And instead of feeling at home, she felt cold.

She closed her eyes and sighed. "You really aren't here anymore, are you…"

A single tear trailed down her cheek and landed on the armrest of the seat.

"I wonder what's going to happen to us now that..." she stopped herself and swallowed, "Now that our future is so uncertain."

"I wonder what he would've wanted to do with you," she sat up and looked around. "I've never asked him. But I guess we didn't really talk too much about 'after the war'. It seemed so distant then. But now..."

"What am I suppose to do with you?" she asked the Zero. Her own voice echoed back in answer.

"I suppose...since there's no one else who could use you now..." she felt choked up again, but continued. "And besides, we probably don't need mobile armours now that the war is over. I suppose we could always put you in the aviation museum or something."

She paused and considered her idea. "Yes, I think we'd better do that, or else they might turn you into scrap metal."

She patted the armrest, as if assuring the mobile armour. "Don't worry, I won't let them do that to you. In fact, that's the last thing I'd let them do."

After all, the Zero was one of the few things that he'd left behind, and she swore she'd take good care of it for him.

* * *

_AN: I always did wonder what happened to the dear old Zero. In the manga, Mwu wanted to use the Zero after his Strike was damaged, but the Zero pretty much disappeared in the anime after getting the Skygrasper._

_Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter._

_Oh yeah, on a side note, I'm building a Mwurrue shrine, and I want to know, why do you guys like this pairing so much? If you want to participate, please PM me._


	52. Work

**Title/theme: **WORK  
**Genre: **fluff  
**Approx time line: **Phase 42-47 of GS  
**Summary: **_"Save your work Murrue,"_

-------

"Are you done yet?" the blond man asked as he peered over her shoulder, where she was busily tapping at her laptop.

"No," she answered for the upteenth time without looking up.

"Are you close to being done?" he tried again.

"No."

"Oh come on, it's late, and I want to go to sleep."

She paused, and turned to him, confused. "What does me finishing my work have anything to do with your sleeping pattern? If you're tired, then go to sleep."

He rested his chin on her shoulder and grinned. "You know I can't sleep without you."

She rolled her eyes. "Well, try." She went back to her report again.

"You're so cold Cap'n..." he protested.

She didn't answer, choosing to ignore him instead. Eventually he'd get bored and tired, and leave her alone.

"Don't you think you've worked enough Murrue? Aren't you tired?" Apparently he wasn't bored, or sleepy, yet.

"No."

"Oh I think you are," he told her smugly.

"Oh yeah? How would you know?" she asked while typing.

He pointed to the screen at a particular paragraph. "This doesn't even make sense," he told her helpfully.

She reread what she had wrote, and flushed as she realised that he was right.

"It's because you keep on distracting me!" she protested and attempted to fix her report.

"So why don't you call it a night, and I'll stop bugging you."

She groaned in frustration. "Mwu, you're so annoying!"

"I know," he grinned.

She turned to him and glared, but he wasn't the least bit fazed, as he returned her glare with a smug smile.

Rolling her eyes, she attempted to continue writing. But found it hard to concentrate once again as he started kissing her neck.

"S-Stop that!" she tried to push him away.

"You stop writing first."

"Urgh! Mwu, why don't you just go to bed! I'll join you when I'm finished, okay!"

He continued to kiss her.

She sighed. "You realise that the more you distract me, the longer it's going to take me to finish, right?"

He paused and straightened up as he realised this fact.

She sighed in relief. Maybe now he would finally leave her alone.

No such luck. He decided to take matters into his own hands.

"Save your work Murrue," he told her firmly.

"What?" she was baffled by his request.

"Save you work," he repeated, tone all serious.

"Okay..." she didn't know what he was up to, but did as he said and hit the save button.

"Good," he said. And before she realised what he was doing, he pushed the power button and turned off her computer.

"W-Wha..." she was speechless as she stared at the black screen. "M-Mwu!"

She reached for the power button to turn the laptop back on, but before she could do so, she found herself being carried out of her chair.

"What are you doing!"

"Taking matters into my own hands," he told her matter-of-factly as he carried her to the bed and deposited her there.

She was too stunned to move as he climbed in beside her.

"I-I'm not finished my work yet..."

"I know. You still have work to do here," he winked as he pulled her close.

She uttered a sound that was halfway between a laugh and a cry. Sighing in defeat, she realised that she'd never get her report finished tonight anyway, not with him here.

"You really are demanding..." she mumbled as she kissed him back.

* * *

_AN: hehe, gotta love the inuendos...and Mwu XD_

_ahh, so much fluff!_


	53. Childish

**Title/theme: **CHILDISH  
**Genre: **fluff  
**Approx time line: **Phase 42 of GS  
**Summary: **"_Is that why you act so immature sometimes?" _

-------

"You look like you could use some coffee," Mwu observed as he set the mug down in front of his captain, before taking a seat across from her.

She smiled weakly. "Thanks."

"Something troubling you?" he asked, almost casually, as he took a swig out of his own cup.

She groaned and rested her head on the table. "I'm just tired that's all."

"Right…" he raised an eyebrow, unconvinced.

She exhaled, the air blowing up at her bangs. He knew her too well.

"I guess, I'm a bit worried, about our mission," she mumbled, staring off into space. "I mean, even the children are fighting."

Her eyes widened as suddenly a thought occurred to her. She lifted her head and looked at his expectant face.

"In fact, except for you, all of our pilots are teenagers."

He narrowed his eyes. "Are you implying something?"

She didn't answer, just turned her head to hide the smile creeping onto her face, amused by her new discovery and his reaction to it.

He sighed and leaned back in his chair. "Yeah yeah, I know. I stick out like a sore thumb. The captain at Heliopolis pointed that out to me as well," he said flatly. Then he grumbled, "Makes me feel old. And I'm only twenty-eight!"

"Is that why you act so immature sometimes?" she asked, thoroughly amused.

He was unfazed. "Hey, I gotta do _something _to feel young." He rested his feet on her desk, a pen sticking out the corner of his mouth as he returned her look of amusement.

She shook her head, laughing. "I guess it has the desired effect. Now get your feet off my table!" she said as she shoved at his feet, causing him to almost topple over.

The way that he managed to maintain his balance while trying hard to look dignified made her laugh again.

"You're very entertaining, you know."

He stood up and gave an exaggerated bow. "Why thank you! I'm glad to be of service."

Grinning, he walked to her side and embraced her, resting his head on her shoulder. "Anything else I can do for you?"

She laughed and ruffled his blond curls. "Sometimes, it seems that you never grew up."

He just grinned. "Thank you."

"It wasn't meant as a compliment."

"That's okay." He kissed her neck. "As long as you don't find me too childish all of the time..."

"Mmm," she closed her eyes and let his lips caress her skin. "No, you're not childish _all_ of the time..."

* * *

_AN: yay more fluff! well, it's true, Mwu is the only pilot in the Triple Ship Alliance over 18 :D_


	54. Sun

**Title/theme: **SUN  
**Genre: **general  
**Approx time line: **During GS  
**Summary: **"_He was the sun"_

-----

He was the sun.

It was in his golden locks, in his intense eyes, in his warm embrace, his inviting lips, his loving touch, and in his bright smile.

And she was a planet drawn by his gravity, unable to escape the mesmerizing power and intensity of the sun.

She didn't mind, choosing to obey the laws of nature, choosing to let the sun's rays caress her, nurture her, embrace her.

He gave her life, gave her light, gave her warmth.

But as she spiralled closer, following the wrong orbit, she was blinded by the sun's light, melted by the sun's heat, and chocked on the solar flares.

Because as Icarus learned long ago…

Get too close to the sun, and you'll fall.

--

Word count: 123

* * *

_AN: was going for drabble (100 words), but 123's a fun number._

_Icarus: (Greek mythology) son of Daedalus; while escaping from Crete with his father (using the wings Daedalus had made) he flew too close to the sun and the wax melted and he fell into the Aegean and drowned_


	55. Night

**Title/theme: **NIGHT TIME  
**Genre: **general/romance  
**Approx time line: **During GS  
**Summary: **Night time was when

-------

Murrue disliked the night. To her, the never-ending darkness lasted forever.

Because night time was when she was left alone to her thoughts. Even though she had a chance to relax from the stresses of battle, her mind wouldn't relax. She'd lie awake on her bed, questions and thoughts plaguing her, thinking of the day ahead, and denying her body its much-needed rest. The silence provided no distraction from her thoughts.

And it was cold, where she would lay under the thin blanket alone, curled up in an attempt to conserve warmth.

And the night had brought her nightmares. Even though the sounds of battle ceased temporarily, she could still hear the sounds of alarms or gunfire in her head, haunting her. And she dreamed of her past, of battles and death, and heard the cries of all those souls who left the world around her. She would squeeze her eyes shut, hoping to shut them out, until her fatigued body fell into a restless slumber.

But now, the night didn't seem so bad. In fact, it wasn't long enough, as she found that morning came too soon.

Because night time was when she was with him alone. At night, she could just be herself with him, just be "Murrue", and not "Captain Ramius". At night, she could forget her duty and responsibilities for a while, and revel in the touch of his lips without any inhibitions.

And during the night, she forgot the sounds of battle as his deep assuring voice filled the silence while his calloused hands caressed her cheek. She heard his whispered words of affection and laughed at his stories. She talked to him about anything and everything until they fell asleep together.

And she no longer had nightmares. He chased them away with his warmth, his arms around her, and his presence. She buried her face into the crook of his neck, breathing in his scent, an unique mixture of aftershave, soap, and sweat, and let his gentle breaths and murmurs lull her to sleep.

Murrue loved the night.


	56. Name

AN: Yay, look I'm not dead! No, just really busy.. and writing takes up too much time and concentration... but, since today is Murrue's birthday (yay!), I made an exception and finished one of my older ideas. No, unfortunately it's not really birthday-related, 'cause I already kinda did one for her b-day back in chapter 25, and I don't have any more birthday-related ideas... Actually, I kinda wanted to do one for a picture that I've done, but I couldn't make it on time, so you'll have to deal with the picture and imagine the scene instead. (If you wanna see the picture, go to my homepage in my profile)

* * *

**Title/theme: **NAME  
**Genre: **general  
**Approx time line: **Phase 42 of GS  
**Summary: **_It was hers. Her name_

-------

Murrue Ramius.

It wasn't an especially pretty or extravagant, nor did it hold any special meaning, but it was hers. Her name.

Although, being part of the military, people hardly use it anymore. People around her either called her Ma'am, Lieutenant Ramius, Captain Ramius, or simply Captain. The closest of anyone using her name was Kira, who started calling her Murrue-san, but it was still formal, polite.

Perhaps it was due to this polite and distant environment that she was so polite herself, choosing to refer to the people around her by their titles and last names, and choosing the honourifics carefully.

She supposed that close friends would call each other by first names, but she only had colleagues and comrades.

There was once, when someone called her just Murrue. But he had left her.

And then there was him.

He too, called her Captain, and she couldn't remember him using her name -- first or last, even though he had become rather friendly around her. And she too, remained polite and distant by calling him Commander. That is, until that one day at Morgenroete.

"_That no longer applies...Murrue-san."_

She was surprised and blushed as her name was uttered from his lips.

But still...there was that honourific attached.

Until one day...

She didn't know when it started, or how for that matter. He just all of a sudden dropped the "-san".

"_Good morning Murrue."_

She blinked. "_Pardon?"_

He looked confused, wondering if he had said something wrong.

She smiled and shook her head. "_Nothing, never mind. Good morning Commander."_

She still referred to him by his title, out of habit probably, as it came out of her mouth naturally.

But he seemed to notice. He stopped and corrected her, "_It's 'Mwu', remember?" _he winked. "_I'm no longer a Lieutenant Commander you know."_

_"Oh, right," _she flushed.

But for some reason, for a while, she was reluctant to use his name, still feeling somewhat uncomfortable. She didn't remember calling anyone by just their name, without any honourific or titles whatsoever.

Until one day, after a kiss, she accidentally said his name.

"_Mwu…"_

She gasped, too late to catch herself. He saw and laughed, amused by her reaction.

"_I told you it was alright to call me by name."_

She smiled to herself, finding that she liked the feel of his name on her lips. "_I know, Mwu."_

He still called her "Cap'n" or "Ma'am", but only when he was teasing her. And she still called him "Commander", but only when she was reminding him who was boss. But otherwise, she became one of the few people who called him by name.

And whenever she heard her name uttered in his deep voice, a shiver would run down her spine, and she'd reply happily.

Because he was the only one who called her just Murrue. To him, she was special, she was his "Murrue".


	57. Birthday II

_AN: Ack!! I'm a day late!! TT... sorry... This one's very much different from the one I wrote a while back (chapter 22), I guess I'm in a more fluffy mood :D  
_

_I originally planned this little storyline as a 2-page comic strip, but alas, I didn't finish it on time (it's still in the rough sketch stage)... then it occured to me last night that I could just write the story instead (heh it's much faster). So yeah, I'm a day late, so happy (belated) birthday Hawkie!!  
_

* * *

**Title/theme: **BIRTHDAY II  
**Genre: **fluff  
**Approx time line: **AU after SEED or after Destiny  
**Summary: **_"__Tomorrow would be Mwu's birthday"_

-----

"Phew!" Murrue sighed as she dropped the pile of reports on her desk and slumped in her chair. She has been working practically non-stop to complete her latest project that was due at the end of the month. She glanced at her desk calendar and smiled. November 28th.

So yes, technically she did have one more day to work on her project, but tomorrow would be Mwu's birthday, and she didn't want to work through that. Of course she wanted to spend the day with the birthday boy.

She grinned to herself at that thought. "Birthday boy" eh. Even though he would be turning a year older, she still thought of him as a boy, with the way he acted most of the times.

Murrue stifled a yawn and glanced at the clock with sleepy eyes. She hadn't slept too much in the past few days in order to finish her work on time.

_It's only 2 o'clock. I think I'll take a nap…_

With that, she slumped over her desk and closed her eyes, thinking of what present to pick up for Mwu on the way home.

-------

_Brriinnggg_!!!

"Hmm?"

Murrue cracked open an eye at the foreign sound that woke her up from a wonderful dream.

"Ugh." She closed her eyes, deciding to ignore the sound.

But it was persistent, coming again and again. With a groan of annoyance, Murrue sat up and grabbed the phone that was on her desk.

"Hello?" she grumbled.

"Murrue-san?" asked the voice at the other end, somewhat intimidated by her response.

"Oh, Kira-kun," she smiled sheepishly, "Sorry, I just woke up."

"Oh. I'm sorry to wake you up," the boy replied. "But uh, it's 5:30, and we were wondering where you were, and we were getting worried."

"5:30?" Murrue replied numbly, glancing at the clock automatically. He was right, she did sleep for more than 3 hours. It probably was time that she should get going.

"…So uh, are you coming? We're all waiting for you, and Mwu-san's getting impatient as well as worried."

"Huh? Coming, where?" she asked, confused.

"Uh, to Mwu-san's party, don't you remember?"

"Of course," she replied, "For his birthday right? That's tomorrow."

A long pause at the other end of the line.

"Um, Murrue-san, it's today," Kira told her in a small voice.

"But…" Murrue was getting more confused. "It's on the 29th, right? So…"

"Yeah…" a pause "That's today."

Murrue's eyes widened as she looked at her desk calendar, which was clearly flipped to November 28th.

Thinking quick, she logged on her computer and checked the date.

_November 29th._

She slowly sat back down in her chair, feeling numb.

"Murrue-san? Are you all right?" asked Kira, hearing the silence on the other side of the line.

"…Yeah, I'm fine," she managed to reply. "I, I'll be there soon."

She hung up the phone and slumped in her chair.

"Ah damn it!"

She had been working so hard that she'd forgotten to change the date on her desk calendar! And she'd been so confident that Mwu's birthday was tomorrow that she didn't even think to double-check.

She suddenly sat up straight. Oh no!

She was planning to get his present after work today! Looking at the clock, she almost cried. The little shop that she was going to buy Mwu's present from closed at five.

Now what!

She slowly got up and put on her coat. She couldn't believe how horrible she was, forgetting his birthday, and on top of that, she didn't even have a present for him.

_I, I guess I'll have to make it up to him tonight then…._

----------

"Murrue! You're here!"

He didn't give her a chance to move before wrapping her up in a tight hug.

"I've been waiting for ya."

"Sorry I'm late," she mumbled into her shirt, unable to keep the smile from forming on her lips.

"Come on and enjoy the party," he released her and took her by the hand, leading her into the house.

"Sure…"

"Hmm?" He turned around, noticing her lack of enthusiasm. "Something wrong?"

She couldn't meet him in the eye, standing there with her head bowed.

"Hey, are you all right?" he asked softly, reaching out to put a hand on her shoulder. But she backed up slightly before his hand could reach.

"I'm so sorry!" she blurted out, bowing to a surprised Mwu.

"Huh? What are you…"

"I'm sorry," she repeated, straightening up, still looking to the side, and he was surprised to see the buds of tears forming in her pretty eyes.

"I, I forgot…" she lowered her head, "I forgot your birthday Mwu… I thought it was tomorrow… and I… I didn't even get you anything. I'm sorry."

A tear threatened to fall, but just as it did, he caught it with his finger.

"Hey, don't feel bad," he assured softly and cupped her face and tilted it up.

"But I… I didn't even get to spend your birthday with you," she protested.

"It's still my birthday, isn't it? You have all night," he winked.

"Still…" her eyes cast down again.

"It's okay Murrue," he smiled softly. "I know you're busy, and that you're working hard. I'm just glad that you're able to be here right now.

Murrue looked up and blushed at the gentle look in his eyes. She couldn't help but start smiling as well.

"Even so, I didn't get you a present…" she sighed.

To her surprise, he suddenly pulled her into his arms, making her blush even deeper.

"It doesn't matter Murrue. I don't need any materialistic presents, you know that. All I ever wanted for my birthday is for you to be here with me. That's enough for me," he whispered in her ear.

She smiled softly and rested her head on his shoulder, wrapping her arms around him.

"Thanks. I promise that I'll spend tomorrow with you."

She closed her eyes and sighed in content.

"Happy birthday, Mwu."


	58. Protect

**Title/theme: **PROTECT  
**Genre: **angst  
**Approx time line: **After GS  
**Summary:** "_If you ever need me to, you know that I'll be willing to…"_

"Captain! The Lohengrin, it's—!"

"Evade!!"

"There's no time!"

Murrue could only stare helplessly at the bright light coming to claim her. Instinctively, she grasped the sides of her chair and readied herself.

As her eyes squeezed shut, waiting for the blow she knew was coming, all she could see was him, his face, his eyes, his smile. Her mind groped in the darkness for him, screaming desperately.

_Mwu… Mwu! Help me…please… I don't want to…not yet...Mwu…_

-----

"I'll protect you."

"Eh?"

Murrue turned around and stared at him, confused. He stared back with an earnest look in his eyes.

"W-What do you mean?" she looked away, lips turning upwards, thinking that he was just teasing her again.

"I'll protect you," he repeated.

She let out a small laugh and looked up at him, smiling. "Thanks for the offer Mwu, but you know I don't need you to do that."

He didn't reply nor smile, locking eyes with her silently. Her smile faltered slightly.

Taking a step closer, she took his hand in both of hers and looked down at them.

"It's okay, you don't have to do that," she murmured softly, "I can protect myself you know."

His hand suddenly grasped hers and squeezed, surprising her. Murrue looked up and found herself staring into his intense blue eyes, unable to look away.

"…" she opened her mouth to ask what was wrong, but no words came out.

Still holding her hand, he spoke quietly, with a calm that startled her.

"Please Murrue, let me protect you."

Flustered, she finally managed to break away from his eyes, though he still didn't let go of her hand.

"I, uh, I," she stuttered. "I-If you say so, I guess..." She let out a small laugh to relieve the tension she was feeling.

"Murrue…" Before she could react, he pulled her into his arms. Resting his chin gently on her shoulder, he whispered into her ear. "Please…"

The young captain wasn't sure how to react or what to say. She wondered what had gotten into her commander. Why was he suddenly so serious? A part of her felt uneasy.

"They say a soldier is rejuvenated when he finds someone he wants to protect," he whispered, his deep voice reverberating beside her ear. "A soldier, that's all I can be right now, and I finally found that someone most important to me, someone I want to protect with my life. So please… If you ever need me to, you know that I'll be willing to…"

His voice faded, and she was glad, because she didn't want him to say those words that she knew were next.

Pulling away, she gently ran a hand down the side of his face, her eyes searching him, as if studying and memorizing it. Her eyes softened.

"All right, fine," she sighed, smiling softly, "If it'll make you happy." She leaned into his shoulder and closed her eyes. "But you know, if you want to make _me_ happy, I think I'd rather have you alive and by my side."

He finally let out a small laugh, much to her relief.

"Yeah, I know."

----

Tears blurred her vision as she leaned against the doorframe to his empty room. Tilting her head back, she let out an ironic chuckle.

"I told you I didn't need you to protect me, didn't I?"

She closed her eyes, her mind recalling the events not so long ago, how she was calling for him then… And how he had answered her.

_Did you really hear me back then? Is that why you came?_

She remembered his last words to her.

"_Didn't I tell you that I could make the impossible possible?"_

_Didn't I tell you that I'd protect you with my life?_

"Yes Mwu, you did…But did you forget what _I_ said?"

Silent tears trailed down her pale cheeks as she smiled mirthlessly.

"I told you…"

---

Word count: 650

* * *

AN: Yay I'm not dead! 

Hmm, haven't written angst/serious stuff in a while... Random idea sprung while watching Gundam Wing and hearing this quote "They say a soldier is rejuvenated when he finds someone he wants to protect." as said by Noin to Relena when talking about Heero and Zechs' duel. In a lot of ways, Mwu is kinda like Zechs (including the alter ego thing, and they even have the same Voice Actor). Anyway, that thought also made me wonder what Murrue was thinking in those few moments. And in case you couldn't tell, the block in the middle is a flash-back sort of thing, I just didn't want to block the whole thing in italics 'cause it'd be harder to read.

Wow, could you believe that "Promise Me" has been published for exactly a year now?! It didn't seem that long ago... Thanks everyone for the support! (and I just had to write an angsty one to celebrate, right? XD)

(goes back to hibernation)


	59. Words

**Title/theme: **WORDS  
**Approx time line: **After GS  
**Summary:** "_Every time she tried telling him, the words got caught in her throat."_

--

"I love you".

Three words. Three simple words.

Yet, she could not say them.

"_Murrue,"_

"_Hmm?"_

"_I love you."_

_She felt her cheeks flush, and the corner of her lips turn upwards._

"…" _she looked into his kind eyes and opened her mouth to reply, but no words would come out. It seemed as if they were stuck in her throat. Instead, she nodded softly and leaned into his embrace._

_She closed her eyes. 'I know.'_

_She could feel it, this warmth in her heart whenever he was near, whenever she thought about him. Yet for some reason, every time she tried telling him, the words got caught in her throat, and she was forced to swallow them._

_Perhaps she was just no good at saying things like those. She couldn't say them to _him _either. _

_But she wanted him to know, so badly. Or maybe, he already knew._

'_One day, one day I will be able to say those words that I want you to hear…'_

As she stared at the empty room, she would never have a chance to say those words.

* * *

AN: -gasp- an update!! Guess I've been in a more drawing mode than writing mode lately... yay for Mwu/Murrue fanart!! 


	60. Lipstick

AN: Back with some more randomness :D

* * *

** Title/theme: ** LIPSTICK **  
Genre: **Humour/Fluff **  
Approx time line: **Phase 41 of GS **  
Summary: **_"Say, were you very pretty when you were younger?"_

---

"Why are you doing that?"

Murrue stopped and turned to him, "Doing what?"

"Putting on lipstick," he replied from his spot on her bed, glancing at her curiously.

She shrugged and turned back to the mirror, and continued to apply the pink lipstick with care.

"It's not just you, but I noticed the Lieutenant had lipstick on too."

"Hmm…" she put down the lipstick and went to grab some tissue to dab at her mistakes. "Trust you to notice these things."

He shrugged, even though her back was turned to him. "I'm just curious."

"It's because we're women," she replied.

"And…"

She sighed and faced him. "It's to make us presentable."

"You mean 'pretty'." He eyed her up and down. "But you're already pretty without all that makeup."

"Gee thanks Mwu," she gave him a wry smile and turned to the mirror again.

"But seriously," he continued, leaning back against the wall, "Who else do you want to look pretty for? You're on a warship. I'm sure the crew couldn't care less, as long as you don't look a total slob or something."

"What, like you?" she grinned, unable to resist.

"Hey, I don't look like a slob!" he protested, offended. "Well, most of the time anyway."

She laughed and threw the ball-up tissue at him, except it didn't quite make it there. "It's a female thing, you wouldn't understand."

He laughed too, "No, you're right, I don't understand. It's one of the mysteries that men will never be able to solve."

"But like you, they'll try anyway."

"Yup. And fail miserably."

Stretching, he watched her in silence as she leaned close to the mirror and applied mascara.

"Say, were you very pretty when you were younger?"

She stopped the applicator in the air and turned to him with a raised eyebrow.

"I mean, were you popular with the guys in those days?" he grinned. "Did they all chase after you and fight over you?"

Murrue stared at him due to his sudden, and odd, question. Shaking her head, she rolled her eyes and turned back to the mirror.

"Oh yeah, they couldn't help it and threw themselves at me," she answered sarcastically. "And if you had known me back then, you'd be one of those guys, right?"

"Yup, that's right," he answered, grinning in that way of his. "I'd be chasing you the hardest."

She stopped again, looking at his reflection in the mirror, and she couldn't tell whether he was joking or not. But she found herself blushing slightly at that smile of his.

"And," he stroked his chin in a 'look at me I'm handsome' way, "I bet you would've found me irresistible."

She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, sure," she told him dryly.

"But really," his tone suddenly became soft, "You don't have to put all that stuff on your face."

She smiled at him in the mirror. "Yeah I know," she answered softly, "It's more or less from habit anyway."

"Maybe one day, when I'm not captain anymore." She had meant for it to be a natural remark, but it came out sort of wistful, and she wasn't sure if he caught that or not.

Maybe he did, because he got up and walked to her, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"Murrue, you're not the captain right here and now."

She wasn't sure what to say, as she felt a lump in her throat and his hand squeeze her shoulder gently.

So she swallowed and nodded, "I know."

Feeling the atmosphere getting a bit tense, he cleared his throat and picked up her lipstick absentmindedly. "So, are you done?"

"Yes." She stood up and took the lipstick from him, putting it away along with the rest of her makeup. Smiling, she kissed him on the cheek.

When she pulled away, she burst out laughing. Mwu stared at her, confused.

"What?"

She pointed to his face, so he glanced in the mirror.

There, on his cheek where she had kissed him, was a pink smudge the exact same shade as Murrue's lipstick.

"Argh!" he rubbed at the spot, only succeeding in making the smudge spread. "This is why I want to know why you put that stuff on."

Laughing, she handed him a tissue.

"Well," she smiled wryly, "Maybe it's because I want be 'irresistible'."

He laughed and kissed her, "But you already are."

* * *

Wow, 60 chapters!! This is the longest thing I've ever written. Should I just end this here and call it complete and start a new collection, or keep going with this one? 


	61. Owari

**Title/theme: **OWARI

---

Murrue Ramius looked around at the empty space.

"What's going on?" she asked the man standing beside her, who was just as confused as she was.

"I have no idea," he shrugged. "I came here 'cause I thought there was supposed to be a story..."

He sighed "But this fangirl, MapleRose… she really is obsessed isn't she…"

Murrue laughed. "Yes I think so too. 60 chapters about us, could you believe it!"

Mwu shook his head in amusement. "Fangirls."

"Well I don't mind them too much," Murrue shrugged, "As long as they don't go too overboard, and stick to the canon."

"Okay fine."

"At least this fangirl didn't make us do embarrassing things in these 60 chapters."

"Not here, but in her other stories…" he mumbled to himself.

"What was that Mwu?"

"Oh nothing."

"At least she respected our privacy by not writing um…" Murrue's face suddenly got pink.

Mwua laughed at her reaction. "Yeah, but I think she made you cry too much, and blush too much. And she calls herself the 'Ultimate Mwurrue Defender', what a hypocrite." Mwu shook his head. Then looking at Murrue up and down, he smiled. "Although," he came closer to her and cupped her face, "You do look cute when you're blushing."

She swatted his hand away, the colour in her face deepened.

"We still haven't figured out why there's nothing here," she stood up straight and changed the subject.

"Hey wait, what's that?" Mwu pointed to a piece of paper on the ground.

"Looks like a note of some sort." Murrue picked it up and read it aloud.

" 'Dear Readers, thank you very much for your support of _Promise__ Me._ I had a lot of fun writing all these stories. So thanks for sticking with me throughout 60 chapters. However, this collection has gotten really really long with too many chapters, and things are becoming hard to find. So I am going to end the collection here, and start a new collection titled _Captain and Commander,_ which can be found under my profile. I hope you will join me there as I find more ways to show my fangirlness.' Signed, 'MapleRose'."

"Wait, what's that down there?" Mwu leaned over Murrue's shoulder and pointed to the small text under the signature.

" 'P.S. Murrue-san, I'm sorry for making you cry so much for no reason at all, and for making you blush like a high school teenager so often. And Mwu-san, sorry for making fun of you, and for making you seem like a teenager sometimes. I will try harder in the next collection to not do those things. But if I do, please forgive me, the inner fangirl sometimes can be hard to control. Lastly, thank you for letting me write about you, I really appreciate it.' "

"So is that why there's nothing here… the fangirl decided to end this collection and start a new one," Mwu mused.

Murrue shrugged, "I guess so."

"So that means… we're free for the rest of the day, right?" he winked. She just rolled her eyes. But her cheeks pinked when he embraced her from the back and rested his chin on her shoulder.

"Not now Mwu…"

"Why not? I'm sure we'd have some rest time between ending this set of stories and starting a new set. And it's not like we have anything to do here anyway."

She sighed and looked at the emptiness around her. "Okay, fine." She grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the exit, missing his big grin.

"Do you think that the fans will continue to read stories about us in this next collection?" she murmured.

He shrugged. "Heh, I have no idea. But I'm sure this fangirl will continue writing about us either way."

As they exited, the note paper drifted slowly to the ground.

* * *

AN: Cheese way to end _Promise Me_, but it's getting long (it's the longest story I've written).. so I want to end it here and start a new collection. 

_Captain and Commander_ can be found under my profile, or www. fanfiction. net/ s/ 3653376/ (take out the spaces)

Thanks everyone for reading and reviewing _Promise Me_!!! ♥ MwuxMurrue ♥


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